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Thread: I Only Need Myself.

  1. March 16th, 2005, 09:53 PM #1
    Lay Doubt.
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    I Only Need Myself.

    I'm steadily losing religion while also confusing this wisdom
    I realize my views and opinions are only amusing his minions
    Refusing to listen, the other day someone threw me a vision
    It showed a gruesome incision to the state of blues that I live in
    Making a clueless decision, who's really choosing admission?
    And the few who do get in.. are they bruised from deliverance?
    There's no room for indifference, is God holding a spot for me?
    He's probably hoping for honesty and I'm promoting hypocrisy
    At times my lonely conscience leaks a load of thoughts that bother me
    I'm told that I'm a mockery, there's no one around to talk to me
    I only wanna stop to think, so caught up that I forgot to breathe
    I'll try to go on flawlessly but I'm so exhausted and on the brink
    Mentally washed-up and often weak, I have my eyes on a feast
    My plate is full of lies and deceit.... so don't be surprised if I eat
    Inside I'm a beast, feeling trapped, it's like I try to get free
    And any denial will bring.. overflowing anger that rises like yeast
    This provides me at least... with a sudden newfound revival
    Then a moment of hype will, remind me I'm alive still.....

    ..and so I put down the bible.

    I only need myself.
    Last edited by Lay Doubt.; March 19th, 2005 at 06:02 PM
    Been a real one.
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  2. March 16th, 2005, 09:55 PM #2
    Lay Doubt.
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    will edit with links.

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=178372
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=178238
    Last edited by Lay Doubt.; March 17th, 2005 at 02:50 PM
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  3. March 16th, 2005, 10:04 PM #3
    Knoxxious
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    Damn.......This is some dope shit man. Flowed well, nice structure, multi's were tight, wording and vocab to be honest was outstanding, concepts and creativity worked very well. I reckon this verse is Hall OF Fame worthy, that's why I'm nominating it. Keep dropping shit like this. pz.

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  4. March 17th, 2005, 12:11 AM #4
    Lay Doubt.
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    thanks.
    Been a real one.
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  5. March 17th, 2005, 12:34 AM #5
    Tim
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    agreed with knox this was a really dope drop by you nice concept and amazing flow each lines went down perfectly liked the emotional level you brought in this piece also the vocab you used made it even doper to read your turning into a very dope topical wtiter also you should join ss stay up man and can you please retun the favor thanxs
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  6. March 17th, 2005, 12:37 AM #6
    Lay Doubt.
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    link me man..
    Been a real one.
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  7. March 17th, 2005, 12:41 AM #7
    Tim
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    http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=178372
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  8. March 17th, 2005, 02:04 AM #8
    djb
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    good stuff i really liked this. i thought the end was a little sudden but very nice drop. good flow nice multi's and overall a good read. i like the theme of this also. very cool idea. and yes listen to tim and join ss. i wanna beat you....lol.
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  9. March 17th, 2005, 10:06 AM #9
    Rezen
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    nice.

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  10. March 17th, 2005, 11:17 AM #10
    warchild
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    This was tight a good concept you got good imagery and emotion out in the rhymes it was just raw.
    The structure and vocab were fine youve got a nice flow so overall nothing to hate on a really nice verse.

    Return the favour.
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=178619
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  11. March 17th, 2005, 01:09 PM #11
    Ion Metatron
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    Ouch.. that was deep on some Fuck God I'mma do me shit lol.. Pretty bold of you.

    But aside from that this joint was tight.. I was lovin' the multis, one of my favorite devices to use & read.. Done very well here.

    Overall nice Peice of work here Geno.. Keep it Bangin' as Usual
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  12. March 17th, 2005, 01:32 PM #12
    young duce
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    dat shit was hot kid i mean dat shit really work on a nigga mind make a nigga think bout what i done been thru wit all dis otha shit dats some real dope spittin keep spittin dat shit you gone be a RB legend holla at da kid young duce
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  13. March 17th, 2005, 01:50 PM #13
    Deviate
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    This was a very nice piece. It really did prove that it is quality not quantity. You wrote consistantly, maintaining a good flow and level of vocabulary. It was not the technical aspects, however, that attracted my attention. Your emotional writing, complimented by the vocabulary made this truly a great piece. It wasn't just a story that relates to you but it brings other people in to, it involves the reader. This is something that's hard to do and so I really see the quality and work that's in this.

    Nice piece... If you could check out "Unseen Insurgent" in my sig I'd appreciate it.

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  14. March 17th, 2005, 02:50 PM #14
    Lay Doubt.
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    thanks.. feedback returned to Tim, warchild, and Deviate.
    Been a real one.
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  15. March 17th, 2005, 02:53 PM #15
    Ion Metatron
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    ^^Heh.. Peep http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=178636

    You should enjoy it
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