I'm steadily losing religion while also confusing this wisdom
I realize my views and opinions are only amusing his minions
Refusing to listen, the other day someone threw me a vision
It showed a gruesome incision to the state of blues that I live in
Making a clueless decision, who's really choosing admission?
And the few who do get in.. are they bruised from deliverance?
There's no room for indifference, is God holding a spot for me?
He's probably hoping for honesty and I'm promoting hypocrisy
At times my lonely conscience leaks a load of thoughts that bother me
I'm told that I'm a mockery, there's no one around to talk to me
I only wanna stop to think, so caught up that I forgot to breathe
I'll try to go on flawlessly but I'm so exhausted and on the brink
Mentally washed-up and often weak, I have my eyes on a feast
My plate is full of lies and deceit.... so don't be surprised if I eat
Inside I'm a beast, feeling trapped, it's like I try to get free
And any denial will bring.. overflowing anger that rises like yeast
This provides me at least... with a sudden newfound revival
Then a moment of hype will, remind me I'm alive still.....
..and so I put down the bible.
I only need myself.