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Thread: sciiteh-immunity

  1. #1
    Banned Dios de Hip Hop's Avatar
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    sciiteh-immunity

    i strike the last match out and it lights up my face
    identified by the scars and the tears, forged from hate
    i begin to lean, the cracking bricks begin to brake
    thy streak of death has come to the pearly white gates
    five deadly fingers clench at the world gone in flakes
    alive but crossing over, the stench grabs, pulls me to this place
    i guess God wants me to feel it, savor this rancid taste
    pride and dead bodies mixed in on one gigantic plate
    slide away my young brothers, go once again to Gods embrace
    things aside, he'll laugh at me for my krylon blaim
    its never the leader, only the swords fluid stain
    that leaves a blood trail accross the feilds name
    "so and so fought here" but in my eyes its all the same
    the crickets of time, make noise in my mind
    the crimes for which god will make me atone for, are mine.
    as i puff against the cold, my eyes light with the snowflakes
    falling onto a desert slope dipping in and out of no place
    and a single white speck is caught, the cigarette slowly darkens
    mazes of light and darkness, rays begin to center
    and my soul is pulled into the heavens


    had this happend the minds of many would be at rest
    a man would fall, a regime and tyrant would be dead
    laden didnt drop the towers, our chief did.
    but in this scenario, the man behind a mobster war
    would feel the warmth, the fury to the core..
    and on some distant battle field, God would forgive this whore
    on the podium he speaks of success while we're washed into the curl
    if only he was talking about the same war,even the same world



    im on a shitty comp so i dont know if the lines overlap
    tell me if it does.

  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Omniscient's Avatar
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    Hot shit dogg...keep it up...like da vocab and sructure...good piece overall 8.5/10

  3. #3
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    that was good dog...nice flow an structure.....9/10

  4. #4
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    You need to leave 2 links to 2 open mics that you left decent feedback on or this gets closed, Thanks.

  5. #5
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    nice structure, flow was good.

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