sniper's will

[exprtsharpshootr]

thine heart be still,
for I fell a soldiers will

no last words to call his own,
waiting to kill, he sits a prone

no last words, he'll meet his fate,
a silent killer patently waits

2 miles away, bound to kill-
this is known as (snipers will)

cross hairs lined the beads dead square
he knows he's out there, the question where

no one knows the game I play
and hope u never see the day!!!

the bead is broken by your pick
no one tells, but you ARE sick

bead is locked barrel steady
wait to pull, I'm so ready

here's my change, time to pull
slow and steady's how I go

there the pop, bring back the coil
there it went in the spoil

I look again, he's in two
damn good job, my shot was true

my job is done I look around,
always persistently scanning the ground

looking for papers gone astray
I'm done looking I'm on my way

I go home, just to do it again
don't know how, or even when

but I know for sure, I'll be ready,
cause when my rifle rests, it rests steady!!!!!!


http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=139327

[Bloom.Quist]

A unique piece. Topic wasn't there for me, i was kind of lost in it. I couldnt feel a lot of emotion, but your writing still seemed to capture me. For future tips i would try to portray more emotion into the subject of ure writing. Good job.

B

[DthsMissingAngel]

Pure dedication to what you do. Good job. I remember readin this one too. Flow was great, and the scheme was good. You always have the imagery down pat. Good job hun. keep up. Tty bout it l8r

[exprtsharpshootr]

thx, both of u , but bloomquist, the whole purpose of the poem is to show no emotion as u would if you were in that situation, how it captured you, i'm not to sure, maybe we can talk later and i can explain the poem more! again, thx alot.

[Mistral]

You need to start leaving links man this is like the second piece i saw without a link, so get a link of feedback or we will have to close this, Thanks.
(Bloom You Da Man!)

But this was alright i dunno though..not really a poetry person but im starting to see what is taking effect now lol..But i found this interesting none the less..dont know about the structure though but i cant really judge it...but i did like what you did with this piece...nice.

[exprtsharpshootr]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=139327

[Bloom.Quist]

Closed. Other poem re-opened.