Lunatic ibviously didn't read this....Thankd Wogzta and Filed...much apreciated
Lunatic ibviously didn't read this....Thankd Wogzta and Filed...much apreciated
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
up over Timeless lol....
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
uppin
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
jeez...please? Sumone?
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
This is ridiculous
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
... As 'SHI',' said i wish summer was like that around my area, tasteful imagery
really loved the way you expressed yourself before breakfast, with the birds,
dragon flies and butterflys. I definately like this one, nice to read, makes you feel the summer jus reading from it, really quite something this... Peace ...
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
..........Thai
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Warrior..........
Uppin
Last edited by Sidewinder; April 2nd, 2004 at 12:19 PM
Uppin for more cool people to peep lol...please?
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Well, you asked for Vet's and cool people, sorry but you'll have to setttle for plain old bounce!
Lyric, you are indeed an up and comming poet here on RB. I have known that for some time now, but this second drop proves to me, you can take constructive critisism, and apply it to your work. That in my mind is a true measure of one's gift. If one can incorperate the suggestions of thier fellow members, then that one, is more involved with the work, than thier self! Only a real poet will put the work on a pedastool, and ground them self. Too many try to force the piece, or make it revolve around them. That is a major mistake, the poem should be first and for most at all times. It's not about the indiviual it's about the expression. I think you have that down pcked my friend. A hearty congradulations on that, it's of utmost importance when writting for effect.
I liked this second drop, it was smooth and light. It was a bit more complex than the first, which to me is a great plus. I detected the multies, some of which seemed forced (could of got by without), but not enought to take away from the piece. It just caused some parts to flow, more so than the rest. Tone was well done, I felt your mood at the time. Mellow relaxed and just in awe of your suroundings. Nice job on that. Some of the rhyme patterns you used (mulites) were not neccasary in a drop like this (focused on nature). I just think it took away slightly from the complexity you wove into this piece. Sometimes the two complelment eachother, other times they contrast, depending on the subject and style of the piece. I am no expert and do not claim to be, so don't take my words for more than they are worth to you. Overall this was a really good second drop, and a great way to follow up on your first. I enjoyed the read and can tell where you made those slight alterations from the last drop. Like I said up at the top, that is the true measure of a poet. I think you are well on your way to becoming a common name in RB's poety section. It's been a long while since I contributed here, but many of the members such as filed to name one, can remember when this forum was filled with remarkable talents. It seems as if the changing of the gaurd so to speak is upon us again. You guy's are doing a great job, please keep it up and encourage eachother to do the very best work you can.
Expression is more than an art, it's a way of life!
~Bounce~
Last edited by Bounce; April 2nd, 2004 at 01:16 PM
[YOUTUBE]Av7yOXafS40?hd=1[/YOUTUBE]
"World Class War" Official Music Video
We can use all the views we can get, please support the Father/Daughter movement in hip hop. Do us a favor and post on your Facebook walls and such. Thank you
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
good imagery.... liked the care-free child-like feeling it gives. Could use some improvements on vacabulary and multis, but all in all nice work. pz
Thanks $pit...and thanks Bounce...really appreciate it
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
uppin for a few more opinions
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
please?
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Damn..shits pathetic at times
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
see above post
A few achievements here and there
To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.
Posting Rules
Reply With Quote