Dark days.
lonely nights.
head spinning.
endless fights.
Hectic thoughts...making my mind shake, try to relax, lay down, only to feel my heart race.
The need to gather my thoughts but they always seem to overtake.
I take a deep breath and let out an uneasy sigh.....
This feeling slowly takes over.....mind, body, and soul.
I sit up.....
Lay back down.....
Faced with losing control.
Get a grip.....I cant!!?!?
I wanna scream!
I wanna yell!
I need to hit something, anything just to release this anger.
I see red....all my feelings have turned cold.
At what point did I simply let go?
How cud all this be so real when inside i feel dead?
I get up but only to get knocked down again.
I feel it.....its coming....that weakness that holds me back, holds me down, lower then the ground.
I feerl sedated as the world walks over me.
I feel my anger rise, once again I hold it all in then just let go.....
I cave in.
I throw my head in my hands and cry as everything passes me by....
my happiness.
my life.
my world.
my love...........why??
why this stress the kind that just takes over and eats at the best?
head pounding.
mind bottling.
I cant eat.
I cant sleep.
falling hard.
falling deep.
wanting to hold on as i watch myself let go.
I've reached my peak.
I dont even believe the words that I speak.
I've tried so hard only to realize..................I'm weak.