Shades of Grey
By: Cry
"Remembering is one thing for a loss...
taking action is another."
There's dirt in my shades of grey...
...little specks blotting out events
so that I can't see what's plain as day.
when you were here...
your love made a difference --
your heart was made of grain...
injecting life in our family.
Then you died,
and it's safe to say...
there was no more sunlight,
our source of happiness --
became a dry, sun-less, desert.
no shine - just dark...
no air to breathe,
we're a family of moon-men...
looking for water on a baron globe,
without a bulb... idea deprived
as to where our next step will be.
but instead of one small step for us,
it's only one large step from love,
- and one microscopic step for mankind.
because outside this town,
maybe five phonecalls of a million
would care you're gone now...
and maybe, if the price was right,
they'd come on down...
they'd be at your memorial,
in that church...
mooching the snack-bar
instead of God, now...
crying a few tears --
but not for we who cry the most.
your family...
broken without you,
knowing... the church you were remembered in
will very likely be the last we enter.
thinking that since you're gone,
the previous christmas as a whole --
as a family --
was probably our last december.
no glue... no band-aid could fix this,
you were the strong hold,
begging this family to love each other.
when you left us...
I got kicked out,
slapped too -- for what it's worth...
moved from house to house,
missing you.
Aunt and Uncle split,
both in new relationships...
even Ashley moved away --
now seventeen and expectin' a baby!!
...if only you were here,
God, it's making me crazy.
Jackie was bein' hit by some guy,
it's like our family's breathing quit,
because if you were here --
we both would've ended up there
- beatin' him.
but I guess that's life...
it's been years since it happened,
and no body's taking action,
so Grandmother -- Betty...
it may have left them,
...but your heart's never left me.
There's dirt in my shades of grey...
...little specks blotting out events
so that I can't see what's plain as day.
when you were here...
your love made a difference --
your heart was made of grain...
injecting life into our family.
You were the sun, soil, and water...
and without those to offer
our family's growth portrays decay,
now it's up to me...
I'm the light in the dark,
the soil beneath the flower,
and the rain for it to drink.
first I was sleeping... mourning...
now I'm awake to save --
to pick our fallen family up...
- and erase those shades of grey.
Miss you Grandma...
told you I'd write.
peace.
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