Reign in Blood

Reign in Blood
by trajik

my name is alex, i live adjacent to a palace
a mason's talents that make my face and hands all callous
my brain is balanced, knowledge that's based on ancient ballads
it's plainly fallacy, although i think they meant no malice
society structured on stone: roads, walls, everything known
so too, the king's luxury throne, there's benevolence shown
seeing how the population's grown as more than mindless drones
no bubbles to puncture, evoking the feeling heaven is home
there's education, medication, health care and dentistry
preach meditation, psilosybin, to reach the next degree
our empire nation is running in unique propensity
no explanation, i believe it's true, things are meant to be

if there's one thing that bothers me it's the lottery
it's an obscene act fostering the economy
messages seen vast across the stars like astronomy
it's a monthly occurrence alerting atrocity
curiosity envelops the people, who's chosen?
possibility develops endless as the blue ocean
desired by the entirety, unless you want truth spoken
winning is like having your own personal noose woven
they say the rain and sun rays are regulated by blood
fields of grain dehydrated and awaiting a flood
weather patterns of saturation then dry late in the month
whether random or formulated it's got fate in the clutch

kidnapped mid-nap, wake to a struggle, wearing a muzzle
arms tied, sharp mind but i'm befuddled, we're in a puzzle
four hostages and two in control explaining why we're here
"for positives let beauty behold, we aim to silence fears
your consciousness consumed as a whole contains an opulence
an audience viewing your souls, you're the finest of your peers
we are subservient to a superior species
look around, they invented the interior we see
the wall's inscriptions are all the scriptures i insist you read
abolished diction and polished fixtures that exist as creed
they sleep beneath our feet and are the reason you will bleed
discreet evil genius breed who are the real ones who lead
they feed on our best representatives, never drunk with greed
when we comply they remain in shadows letting us succeed
now you've been educated on how our society functions
your brains hold strength, that's why you are the quiet inductions"

the next morning the populous converged for their tradition
surrounding a platform, circling and merging in position
the air is quite light in spite of the imminent affliction
with last night's insight i'm kind of intimate with the mission
my pulse is calmed and palms are moist in anticipation
nothing's audible beyond the noise of silent patience
the wait is over, the nooses have been allocated
"drawn together, your souls will be amalgamated
let us celebrate their lives and not mourn their departure"
we're drawn inward, depicting a scene of scary artwork
four of us by ankles are hoisted, blood rushing to our head
horrendously severed our voice boxes, flushing out the red
the neck's secretion collects beneath them, into sacred bowls
"let rain reign over the grain fields, and too take their souls"

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This was amazing.

Dude. This was an amazing piece ma . Just the mechanics of it was highly remarkable alone. The way evetything played out and fell into place was genious. Dont know if this was a highly timre consumibg piece or not.. maybe your like me and when ur on you can just flow a piece like this in an hr or so.. iono. But for whatever its worth.. im impressed. Loved this.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Genocide

Dude. This was an amazing piece ma . Just the mechanics of it was highly remarkable alone. The way evetything played out and fell into place was genious. Dont know if this was a highly timre consumibg piece or not.. maybe your like me and when ur on you can just flow a piece like this in an hr or so.. iono. But for whatever its worth.. im impressed. Loved this.

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thank you very much. i saw "genocide" and htought "yes! this dude will rip me a part! the nc dudes loves taking me off my high horse!" (which is good)

i've always been a slow writer, taking my entire allotted time to write a piece for a league. this was the first thing more than 16 lines i've written in over a year. took me probably 10-12 hours of writing time over two and a half days. asked a writer to assign me a topic wednesday night and i posted friday night. so this was actually a pretty quick piece for me. i went outside my element because i don't normally get this creative, i tend to just make something emotional. but this was a nice change for me. i really appreciate the comments about mechanics, it's been so long since i've seen a writer here mention mechanics on my pieces which is one of the reasons i fell out of writing.

http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...31#post8637731

http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthre...ise-By-Request

Nice piece here, flowed real well. Nice use of multies and sprinkled in some inners here and there. I remember you from Dynasty, so its good to see some familiar faces here. Nice shit tho man, stay up.

thanks for the feed man. sorry though, never been on dynasty. rb ria nc and rr are the only ones i've dabbled in

Ahh, im thinking of Majik i think. My mistake.

your first piece in how ever long and im already gonna nominate it for hof..damn dude.

things that were dope: first line thru last line

feed done. lol jk

the vocab here was great. nothing too over the top but still polished enough to really impress me. I know what youre capable of and this didn't disappoint me. very descriptive verse and very creative. dunno if ive ever seen something like this from u. I unno ive been gone for 2 years so shit could've changed. your flow and multis/ inners were execute very well. some tiny issues but too miniscule to quote so I wont. but I honestly couldn't find anything that hindered the experience. and im gonna leave this feed here. got some shit to do but ill come back later tonight and finish

Damn it's been a while since I read one of your topicals that wasn't in a battle. Starting off the topic with quads and make it work seamlessly with the transitions is pure genius. I love how you approach your topics. It's like Rakim mixed with Big L. Fuck the technical shit because that's not even an issue. Overall this is some dope shit from the narrative point of view and I might have to drop this into the HOF thread.....143

thanks guys, means a lot from each of you. you're right @Jukon i've never written a concept like that before, it was very out of my element. @143 rakim mixed with big l, that's dope as fuck thank you very much.