1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
http://mmalife.com/wp-content/upload...es-Feature.jpg
Intro
Welcome to week 6 you fuckers. We had more no shows last week which at this point is not surprising since it happens every fucking week lol. Someone was trying to give me flak for dqing Bomb Bard even though he was roughly an hour late. This is 1-2 punch. ONE FUCKING BAR people.. The rules state: absolutely no extensions and everyone must post a bar REGARDLESS of if your opponent shows or not. And
@Barcotic
fuck you too, I'm not running the shit wrong. If your opponent doesn't check or show you still have to drop a bar to get the win as is stated in the rules. Now that the rules are as clear as they can be, lets move on..
Battle Summaries
Krucial Th1rt3en vs Joe Boston
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Krucial Th1rt3en
at our battle...
we can rap or i can use tools to Earth u... wit something like a blade,
Book 13 on the Card and ill Run BOSTON... or Cut em with the Spade.
vs
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Joe Boston
I'll spit another bar insulting a bitch, this retard dont get it then god forbid
Sure he knows what a lager is, but if im doing that to his sister cunt better have 12 in her fridge
Okay, let me tell you a bit about these 2 when it comes to battling. Krucial likes to focus a little too much on correlating words and having as much shit make a connection as possible but he's not right in this thinking. You need a connection sure, but not 4, 5 or even 6 key words that all connect. You want to have a punch that attacks your opponent with some words that correlate but don't go crazy on that or you're taking away from the sting. Joe Boston just doesn't have it in him to consistently drop good for some reason, and I have no clue why. This last punch he literally flipped a wordplay that was just used on him the week before lmao. That's probably why Krucial got the dub.
KnowP vs plethora
Quote:
Originally Posted by
KnowP
I killed this drag queen last League, Jesus he resurrected again? Not coo!
So I swear to the AzGods If this princess Diana warrior arises, we expect to still see a bitch in a costume
vs
Quote:
Originally Posted by
plethora
ur old P & close to diseased. his lady gotta be fifty at least
nobody uglier Thanos wife, the whole universe fears that wrinkly beast
The first champ match of the season.. And congrats to plethora for taking this one home. I think knowp had a dope wp and with cleaner execution coulda taken this one.. plethora used a nameplay and those are generally counted as personals so that may have been what gave him the edge. This was a good battle though. Good shit to both you guys.
Requiem vs Belooshka aka Zunto
nothing
vs
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Zunto
Cute avatar but..
Your life is in shambles & ur girlfriends a whole
His life image is a downward spiral of him n his ho doing drugs on the floor
I dunno what happened to requiem. Cried bout not getting put in the last contenders match and then no shows when he is in a contenders match. Zunto had a bar that used imagery and metaphor based off of reqs avatar but it wasn't a punch it was just a description more than anything. Zunto moves on to champ match though.
Barcotic vs Bombard
nothing
vs
nothing
Barcotic no showed then cried about not winning due to lack of aa check in even though the rules were right n front of his face. Then BB posted an hour late and got DQed. I wish I could have let him slide with it but if I do that then I gotta let everyone slide with it, and Im trying to run a tight ship here.
Porch Freestyle
[youtube]kboYfDwt7jk[/youtube]
Week 5 Top Punches
people booted for not voting on ANYTHING are not eligible for top 5
3. Krucial Th1rt3en
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Krucial Th1rt3en
at our battle...
we can rap or i can use tools to Earth u... wit something like a blade,
Book 13 on the Card and ill Run BOSTON... or Cut em with the Spade.
2. KnowP
Quote:
Originally Posted by
KnowP
I killed this drag queen last League, Jesus he resurrected again? Not coo!
So I swear to the AzGods If this princess Diana warrior arises, we expect to still see a bitch in a costume
1. plethora
Quote:
Originally Posted by
plethora
ur old P & close to diseased. his lady gotta be fifty at least
nobody uglier Thanos wife, the whole universe fears that wrinkly beast
Interesting Facts
No booty this week gentlemen.
https://i.pinimg.com/236x/b1/d4/90/b...ndom-facts.jpg
https://i.pinimg.com/564x/30/ff/86/3...-fun-facts.jpg
https://i.pinimg.com/736x/ef/fb/fb/e...-fun-facts.jpg
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/6a/b6...b0d92aa285.jpg
https://i.pinimg.com/736x/d4/c6/c4/d...ting-facts.jpg
Week 6 Match Ups / Predictions
Champ Match: plethora vs Zunto
plethora is basically a dump truck plowing through a field of fellow battle rappers. At this point we gotta wonder if he is unstoppable or if someone can humble him and prove that he bleeds like the rest of us. Will Zunto be the one to do it? Hell no. I got plethora taking this battle easily.
plethora: 90 | Zunto: 10
Contenders Match: Crack Morris vs Krucial Th1rt3en
First off fuck anyone who disagrees with me setting this contenders match up. I think this battle could be close.. Crack Morris and Krucial have both shown they got the mechanics down, but I think Crack Morris is a bit more accustomed to the style around here. With that being said I'm giving the edge to him. Should be close though.
Crack Morris: 60 | Krucial Th1rt3en: 40
KnowP vs Joe Boston
Joe Boston just got off a week where he flipped the same wordplay that was used against him the week before. KnowP just lost in a close champ match but had a good bar and walked away from the battle with his dignity. I got KnowP taking this one comfortably.
KnowP: 70 | Joe Boston: 30
ILLunatic vs Kill Spree
ILLunatic hasn't battled in a hot minute but hopefully his disdain for Kill Spree pushes him to drop dope. I think both these dudes will drop some type of personal, but with Kill Spree being more polished at the moment I gotta give the edge to him.
Kill Spree: 60 | ILLunatic: 40
Slowhands vs Lenny
I've heard Slowhands name get tossed around from time to time but I don't really know him. Lenny has had a couple good bars but hes not consistent. I think even though I don't know Slowhands, I'm gonna give him the edge because it seems like he's well known and must've battled and beat some top tier heads.
Slowhands: 70 | Lenny: 30
WEEK 4 WTF'S
WTF @ ILLunatic coming out of his hole and finally getting some E-sun.
WTF @ Zunto being afraid of ILLunatic and telling him to "GET TENFCKAWAY FRKM ME YOU CREEP"
WTF @ Only 5 bars being dropped last week?
WTF @ Lenny getting out of detention to drop some bars?
WTF @ Krucial & B Dot being worse than the Cody P & Dia feud?
WTF @ B Dot and Krucial making up?
WTF @ sniffing dried semen crust?
WTF @ Amen bitching about the battlers in the contenders match?
WTF @ Zunto trying to dictate how the league shall be run and what battles will be set?
WTF @ These WTFs?
WTF???
Outro
We got 5 battles and I'm hoping everyone shows. It's only a bar people.. I think if anyone no shows it will be either slowhands or Lenny. But hey prove me wrong. I don't have much else to say for the outro so fuck you all and have a nice day.
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Nice... lmao
@ILL
coming out of his hole only to get put back into one
- - - Updated - - -
E sun
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Nice write up bro. I'm coming back for that title tho. Sad all these no shows for bar still exist. Lol Joe go kill yourself.
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Ha ha ha you maaast be keeding aren’t chu
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Zunto
Ha ha ha you maaast be keeding aren’t chu
yeah it shoulda been 100 to 0 but I'm a funny guy
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Nice mag
@Fresh.
You are almost close to my caliber of mags.
It's too bad the only bars that showed made the tops 3 list, LMAO.
I'm sorry but the only decent one was Pleth's. KnowP's was a crazy run on paragraph and Kru's was just terrible working and execution.
- - - Updated - - -
Wording.
Fuck typos.
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Amen
Nice mag
@
Fresh.
You are almost close to my caliber of mags.
It's too bad the only bars that showed made the tops 3 list, LMAO.
I'm sorry but the only decent one was Pleth's. KnowP's was a crazy run on paragraph and Kru's was just terrible working and execution.
- - - Updated - - -
Wording.
Fuck typos.
i liked knows bar. was a little long winded but it still worked for me
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Quote:
Originally Posted by
B Dot LESNAR
fans me in his breakdowns, it's awful when he dweebs
ur cooked andouille both know u throat my sausage in ur feeds
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Kill Spree
Andouille was dope to. Some will say it's a reach but say it in slang it works
This slaughtered my soul.
- - - Updated - - -
Say his long winded run on paragraph in slang and it will work,
@Fresh
If shit is forced - just say it in slang - it fixes everything.
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
and doowey
and dude we
I wouldnt call that slang I'd call that having a few dicks in your mouth
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Rappers say shit like that... same in battles.
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Just say it in slang.
That is the answer to life.
Say it in slang.
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5
Amen over here talkin more white than fresh and I combined
Re: 1-2 Punch Season 27 E-Zine: Volume 5