Undisputed Written Battles Championship- Mr Elmsby (c) vs Whorticulture

This is for the Undisputed Written Battles Championship, the title that encompasses ALL formed of written battle.

Introducing first the champion of the LLL, the SS, the FL, the 1-2, and the Golden Gloves... The Great Straight,Mr Elmsby

Next, the contender via call-out... the Bold Word Battler, Whorticulture.

There is to be twelve lines and one bonus closing line.

they call me the bold word battler cuz to talk to who i speak to the way i do you must be bold
say what you want but watch the way you act cuz it'll make me react and i promise you wont grow old
ima let you know MR i be on ELM Street BY the way and they all scared of me im a nightmare like freddy
cruger, no knives im usin my lex luther laymens terms im runnin around with my ruger hauntin these sukkas so u better sleep with your teddy
i highlight my targets in in bold lettering something similar to battlefield
dude said he wanted to battle i left his body some where in a field,battle-field
he said he wanted it drop 12 so i hit him with a dirty dozen
sawed off 12-gauge pump thats a dirty dozen
i didnt want the funk but u wanted to get crunk
so i smiled at you casually walked to the back of my old school and popped the trunk
hammer and some nails so i stripped you of everythang tittles clothes shit i even took your name
ill blow ya block up like osama but they can call me young obama around here cuz shits about to change

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dam that teddy line was to long

Boom! it's Mr Elmsby with the thousand thunders
I speak truths, you speak lie so your speech induces a powerful slumber.

Your line about the teddy was funny, sorry to break the rules of war, you fooled me more
you don't suck cock like the other text battlers but I have to say you do so I can break from a draw

Sorry fella, but even though you can beat most of the bullshit from front lines.
I beat all of them, twice, I casually cause angst and despair sometimes.

These little homos sass with no class, jazz with no pizazz, so check it you pissass.
Facts strumming with zap, Clapton and Frampton with amped gibsons on acid and grass.

I'm the undisputed champ, I cock the metaphorical gun like FL guns for literal cock
But now you do too, so your eventual AIDS should not come as a shock.

For this last line, I'll advise you to not fall into the homotextual traps
Or you'll think it's gangsta to drop homosexual raps.

PS- You'll likely be offered a chance to gun for the fake FL title if you show cock. Resist this at all costs!

Vote DJKINGDAVID

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Johnny Darko

Vote DJKINGDAVID

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You tried to be funny. I can tell you giggled a fair bit while posting this, maybe even a little pee escaped. I regret to inform you that it fell flat. It was basically when a man worn down from a rough day at work goes to his local watering hole and asks for a whiskey neat and they get handed back a chewed-on clown nose and are charged double and the clown nose has the male bartender's number.

His sense of humor about that particular incident, that is about the level of humor you have reached. Even Paula Poundstone wasn't this lame. If you take up comedy as a career or even a hobby, I can promise that you will be raped. Probably on multiple instances. You can bet your last dollar on it, and use the profit on that bet to buy soothing butt cream. You know, because of the rapes.

Just mad because that teddy line caught you.

That teddy line DID cause me to laugh. I won't even lie.

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Not mad if you voted for TV Teddy, just use his actual name. This is the first actual championship match this damn site has seen since before Fresh had his short lived admin status. Which I suspect was revoked because he did something straight.

v/ Mr Elmsby

Mr Elmsby got it

whos this rap95?? haha they deleted me whats up with a rematch I'm feelin froggy