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Soap Box Opera
I stand
I stand alone
I stand for purposes
Proposed by unknowns
I've come to know my purpose
...Standing
I stand
While others sit
Listening to my stance
For a chance to stand
For their own known stance
Untill they are on their own
...Sitting
I sit
While others crawl
Wondering should I crawl
Or should I just lie down
Tasting the ground they crawl in
To plan my stance, within them im
...Crawling
I crawl
So others can sit
They sit understanding to listen
For their own chance to stand
Standing demands me to crawl
But I cant stand to crawl
Do I stand to tall while im
...Falling
I fall
Atop a soap box
Crawling inside your thoughts
Sitting within your hearts
Standing atop your deepest parts
To listen to your thoughts about..
...Speaking
I speak
I spoke to you
Can you speak or move
Now that speech is moving
Im moved to speak by you
Please speak when your spoken to
Speak quickly before im removed
Careful before you speak too soon...
...Listen
I listen
To those sitting
Seeing what its like to stand
When they planned on crawling
They recall seeing me standing
Not knowing that they'll be falling
But i'll crawl to them, calling
Stand tall and crawl to me
...Sing
I sing
Musical songs
Songs of a keynote speaker
Leaving your ears bleeding
I feel musical while I stand
I heal when I sing, I sing because
...We're Standing
We stand
We stand together
We stand to demand purpose
Proposed by those who know
Whether we stand, sit, or crawl
Speak, listen, move, or none at all
We will always stand tall within
Stand with me as we make a stance
...Forever.
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I'm not sure really what to think of it. It had emotional parts but I was sort of lost in the abstract feel to it. I'm not completely sure what it means but I have an idea. The wordplay was well done, I liked how it seemlessly changed from one thing to another. I liked it, however, it became too repettitive in the second to last stanza. It got annoying actually. Well, the last stanza was very well written, it made me like the poem again. You imagery was good, but not very great. I felt that you put great emotion into this piece, but the reader has to look for the emotion to get it. This is an intelligent piece, abstract, well rounded, a bit repetitive, but overall, it's nothing short of great.
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thanks. i replied to your criticism in the crew thread. appreciate it.
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I think this piece is very... emotional. the reader could tell that you put everything into it. Altough, i must agree that towards the end it gets repetative, thus affecting its meaning, and the readers attention spand. But the metaphors are well written and its very well composed.
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Mind I think someone bite this piece from you.
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word. i got your PM's. thanks alot. he's biten more too.
such a shame.
might have to take a break from posting my work for awhile...
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Yeah that is a shame. Stay Up.