Love at first site: verse 2

for those who haven't read it or wutever.
here's the first verse:

Love at first site: verse 1


Verse 2
Either procure flight with this angel, or burst into tears//
I confided confidence in myself by submergin my fears//
Slowly embraced paces I reaped my courage for words//
Somehow everything seemed like a reoccurrence at first//
Introductions were absolute, I felt I knew her before this summit//
The very entity of my dreams, I was already equipped to commit//
Deprivation of previous depression, my heart resisted dismay//
Till this I was insensible to the fact that bliss existed this way//
I breeched supreme glory when I conquered her askin me//
An emergent of miracles, my aspirations converged veracity//
Insurance was superfluous, my feelings became explicit//
I had no real reason to subsist until she became listed//

its about actually speaking to her. the third verse will be up
later. and for those who don't know:
verse 1- when i first saw her
verse 2- when we met
verse 3- where we are now and where i want to be

threads i replied to:
My bitch
I'm ready
U ain't a rapper

peACE

no feedback huh...cmon peepz...i could really use some...
this is for my princess...and i want to know if you guys like it or not...
so i can show it to her...thanx
peACE

This was good i thought...it was something i could relate to cause i write a lot of love songs lol but i liked this...You had good emotion in this i thought, you said what you needed to and got it across good..i felt this verse though...everything seemed good overall....keep at it man.

this is as solid as anyother track here regardless of topic...emotion imadry sincerity poetic concept everything linked well and paints a great perception of love ...great work

nice drop, very well thought up. gr8 vocab(sounds like u swallowed a dictionary lol)
good structure and wordplay, and multi's, keep it up and thanks for the reply.

thanx for the feed back. much appreciation. this came from the heart.
i enjoy writing about how i feel or felt. and this was the result
thanx again.
peace

i thought it was good great picture and flow. you used a good vocab and it seemed like it had alot of feelings in it.

thanx man, i appreciate the feedback. i enjoyed writing this. so i'm hoping
people like it. i'm glad that you do. thanx again.
peace

Either procure flight with this angel, or burst into tears//
I confided confidence in myself by submergin my fears//


^^u piece of shit that was a got damn nice line.
felt that one for sure
im jealus :o.
:hump:
keep up that shit hopin the third verse keep s up with this
.....nice 2 verses
respond to mine in my sig.

thanx dao. i luv you like a brotha. hahaha.
that line is deep. don't you know. its wut makes
and breaks the situation of love.......
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peace

yo this was a great verse.. keep it up dawg.. i was feelin it crazy style

nice drop good flow I was feeling it

yo that was a nice Open Mic I liked the first one and and the second......nice flow....Allround Nicely Done wasn't Long Like All The Others I have read today.........But I have to say Thats a good idea Posting them sewperatly.......9/10 counting the First One too Peace Out Kuz

-{/]~{Ú§kÍ}~[\}-

A nice solid verse, you displayed good abilities by keeping people interested which is something important. You didn't drown yourself in emotion which is good because it becomes to personal a piece, Good drop.

excellent vocab and good topic

nice wordplay and rhyme scheme

it represents your record

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thanx^ peeps...much appreciation...
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thanx again....
peace

I liked part one and I liked part two...

I think your emotion showed more in the first one...

But this one definately had better vocab and complexity.

Plus, it made me want to hear part three, so...

Kudos, my man.

Except for the forced rhyme on "summit/commit", this was pretty near flawless.

8.75/10

Peace

thanx for the feedback bro^...much appreciation...
stay tight............
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peace

can't forget bout this. im gonna start on the third one
soon..uppin
peace..................

LIKIN THIS PLAYER. THE STORY LINE IS TIGHT TO THE POINT. THEM BUTERFLIES ARE BAD WEN U TRYIN TO CHAT A MINT BIRD THAT U REALLY LIKE

^thanx man. word^.........
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peACE

Nice flow to you shit, short and right to the point, good use of vocab and imagry with words..godd shit, decent shit maman

thanx man. i appreciate it.
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peace

this was a good verse, so was the first one though, i liked the vocab in this it was really good, your descriptions on things i think were very well done, the lenght also was good, i think this is going tobe a good song once it is done... you going to put it in adio? it would probably sound good there but thats my 2 cents

great verses keep it up

peace

^thanx man. much appreciation....
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peace

good drop...nice vocab and steady flow..good structure and it seemed like it had alot of emotion and feelings in it....great drop overall

9.5/10

return the favour and hit up my openmics in my sig...thanks

Quote:

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Originally posted by Ace Of Spades
^thanx man. much appreciation....
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peace

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damn. im still working on the third verse. its hella hard.
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........i got like 2 lines for it so far....
..........im going for 10......
peace