Dont Call (personal shit.. deep)

This Was A Track On My Fuckin Father..
Or Whatever He Is.. Its To THe eminem "KIM"
Beat.. SO Go With It From There.. This Will
Be On My Album Also

Fuck You..
Fuck Tha Shit You Put Me Through..
Don’t Chu Every Fuckin Call Me..
I’ll Be Too Fuckin Busy To Answer You..

(Verse 1)
Lemme Make This Real Clear, Cuz I Want You To Hear This Shit..
I’d Say You Play’d A Role In My Life.. But You Was Only There For 2 Years Of It..
N’ You Wonder Why She Left Chu n’ Ya Life In Pieces..
Maybe Its Cuz She Didn’t Wanna See Her Fuckin 2 yr. Kid Get Beaten..
N’ We Know Ya Secret.. How Dumb Do You Honestly Think We Are?!..
Say Your Goin To Rehab.. N’ Locate Ya Ass At Tha Fuckin Bar..
So Now You Wanna Know How Tha Fuck I Am-
And I Don’t Give A Damn To Know Who The Fuck You Are!..
A Little Boy Watchin An Empty Road, n’ View The Relationship That Broke Up..
Didn’t Move For 4 Fuckin Hours til’ I Realized You Never Bothered To Show Up..
A Father That Never Grown Up.. Theirs No Hope In That..
N’ How You Gon’ Tell Your Kid That When You Had Him.. U Was Fuckin Hooked On Crack!?..
Remember Awhile Back.. When Me n’ Jeff Stopped To See Whats Up..
Finally Realized How Much My Life Was Fucked Up-
-When You Chased Me, Shirt Off.. Down The Street Drunk..
Callin Me Everytime You Remember Im There, Tellin Me You Love Me? I Laugh..
Cuz It’s the Same Difference If You Speakin Out Ya Mouth.. Or Talkin Out Cha Ass..
The Hell With The People You Know.. I’m Dreadin Their Faces..
Lets Face It.. You Know Tha Past.. n’ Still Question-
-Why I Didn’t Accept Ya Fuckin Weddin Invitation!?..
I’m Old Enuff To Tell You If You Talk To Me Wrong.. Ima Fuckin Hit You..
You Don’t Know How Old I Am, What Grade Im In-
-Hell, You Didn’t Even Fuckin Know I Rapped Now Did You!?..
God, That’s It Dude.. Keep Remindin Me Me That You My Only Father-
-N’ They’ll Never Be No One Like You’d Start..
When A Complete Fuckin Stranger Is More A Father Figure Than You Are..
You Contributed The Sperm, But A Father? You Hide It..
N’ If Dirt-Bag Had A Fuckin Name.. You Defined It..
You Cant Patch This.. Child Support Checks, Of Shit Chu Cost Bitch..
I Got 16 Years Of Material Jus Sittin Around To Piss You Off With..
Rip You Off It.. You Was Real Man Til’ You Turned For Faker..
I Liked Recievin Ya Letters From Jail-
-They Made For Good Fuckin Burnin Paper..
Invite Me To Ya House.. But I Was Told To Say No To Fags..
Oh, N’ I Never Was Busy.. I Just Hate You (That’s Why I Never Wrote You back)..
Don’t Get Sad, Cuz You Know Exactly What You Did To Me.. –
-You Aint Gotta Be Psychic..
I’ll Call You Up.. Say I’m Comin Over In A Lie..-
- Just See How You Fuckin Like iT!..
I’ll Be Tha Son You’ll Never Have..
If I One Day Become Famous.. I’ll Never Mention Your Fuckin Ass..
Hope You Cry For The Laughter You Coulda Done..
N’ When It Comes Down To It..
.. I Rather Be A Fuckin Bastard Than Your Son!!..



Fuck You..
Fuck Tha Shit You Put Me Through..
Don’t Chu Every Fuckin Call Me..
I’ll Be Too Fuckin Busy To Answer You..

(Verse 2)
Don’t Call Me, I’ll Be Busy, I Don’t Bother With Faggots..
You’re a Fuckin Sperm Donor Cuz You Don’t Fit The Father Status..
There It Is, Bare This Shit.. Faggot Left In Embarrassment..
You Wont Get My Invitation-
So Don’t Bother To Show Up At My Marriages..
N’ When You Die, n’ I’m Prone To Access..
Only Reason I Come To Your Funeral-
-Is To Piss On Your Fuckin Face In An Open Casket..
You Lost Me, You Don’t Know How Much Of A Bitch You Are, Now Do You?..
Shit, I Know Fuckin Animals Who Gotta Fuckin Life Than You Do..
You’ve Caused So Much Pain, I’m Startin To Like The Hurt..
N’ Find If Fuckin Hilarious When I Heard You Ride A Fuckin Bike To Work..
But That’s My Price For Words.. n’ If A Punch Is Love..
Then I Wont Duck n’ Run, Enuffs Enuff..Punch For Punch til’ I Fuck You Up..
You Fuckin Chump.. I Been w/o You For 16 Yrs-
-So Don’t Expect Me To Miss You..
I Fuckin Hate You!.. n’ That’s Just Bein Real Wit Chu..
Fuck You, Fuck Your Life, I Don’t Need Love From You..
You Love Is Garbage, Your Fathering is Bullshit-
-oh, N’ Your Weed Sux Too..
All You Ever Meant To Me Was Less Than Nothing..
So It’s the Same Difference If You Lived Next Door-
-Or Out Tha Country..
Fuckin Punk, Callin Me Drunk, Thinkin Its All Right..
Maybe If We’re Lucky.. You’ll Fuckin Die In A Bar Fight..
Disconnect My Phones Cuz You Wont Stop Callin, Man You Fucked Up..
Trust Me, You Doin Nothin Is Enuff To Ruin So Fuckin Much..
Took A Shit Ride, I’ve Already Done That.. Not Even Gon’ Bother..
When You Die.. I’ll Remember A Scum Bag.. Not A Fucking Father!..

Fuck You..
Fuck Tha Shit You Put Me Through..
Don’t Chu Every Fuckin Call Me..
I’ll Be Too Fuckin Busy To Answer You..

Will Drop Feedback Tomorrow
Really Tired And Frustrated
After Writing That
I'll Edit This With My Feebacks

That is dope in my opinion. I felt what you were saying. I think that it was a nice piece.

By The Way:

Rap Battles sucks dick...

Go To Hiphop Dialect.com

God...The emotions were unbelievable in this piece. You layed out your feelings in a creative way, more than venting, but less than spazzing out. You did a beautiful job with this piece, it came out excellent. Wow..Im amazed, good drop.

Alot Of Feeling'

Is Dis True...

Cuz I Wuz Definitly Feelin You On Dis One...

I Specially Liked Da Part "Didnt Know I Rapped Now Did You"...

Dat Wuz Real Nice...

Good Subject...

Feelin It Homie...

One...

-P

Quote:

---

Originally posted by ShEmY
That is dope in my opinion. I felt what you were saying. I think that it was a nice piece.

By The Way:

Rap Battles sucks dick...

Go To Hiphop Dialect.com

---

hit the nail on the head APART FROM THE HHP STUFF
'spicious i dint know ya cud hit shit like this...damn bra that was hard hittin...i know i sound like a fag but i was gettin a damn lump in ma throat...me n ma dad arent close but it sounds like ya dont really want yours t live...feelings are very clear here...could ya pm me with any audio shit you have?

ratin=10/10

Very emotional, well thought, good flow and rhyme scheme. I was feeling this homie, you showed alot of skill. Keep writen this shit, our rap style is kinda tha same. Ge peep my shit " Closed Doors" Not my deepest one, but it tells somthing that went on in my life. Its not long, so dont worrie about waisten your time either.

OUT

-High Class a.k.a Confusion

that shit was hot .one eminem my idol and i can see this went really well to da beat of that song so much respect to u. i like the vocab and the flow of this hey cheak out my shit under poetic scriptures it called dear mom

Thanks..
Yes This Is True.. I Get Frustrated Everytime
I Write it Or Spit it To Myself.. If You've Been
In My Situation You Know HOw it Feels. But I'll
Drop Sum Feedback Now.. Just Got Too Pissed
Off At Myself When I Wrote This..

Audio Sometime in The NExt Two Weeks.. n' Im
Not Gon' Hesitate The Blow The Track Up.. You
Felt Me Here, Then Your Gon' Feel Me Even More
When I Drop On Audio

this shit was sweet man fuck it made me think about all the shit that pissses me off in my life

so u pissed me off for makin me feel that way :mad:

jk

anyway fuck emotion out the ying yang
i felt this a lot nice imagery
good shit much props

peace

Thanks Bro..
Much Appreciated

Feedback On..
^^ That Kids Piece
LoCo
n' Withersmith

Quote:

---

Originally posted by Auspicious
N’ When You Die, n’ I’m Prone To Access..
Only Reason I Come To Your Funeral-
-Is To Piss On Your Fuckin Face In An Open Casket..
[/I] [/B]

---

^^^ That was dope. This pice was amazing. The emotion was just flawless. Keep spittin. And check your pms.

dude good shit
lotta emotion and good vocab
good visuals
too much info...lol
real good verses

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=93377

if ya could ^^^

Up

Emotional, Deep, excellent peice.
Felt it real bad.
I know there is possibly nothing i can say ot make matters better, but i can say that this peice was written very very well. When it sounds good in writing, it will sound excellent on audio. Make sure you post it on the site or something. Vocab was good, way to stay with it, and nice use of flow, it was good.
Overall-9/10...

1 point reducted cuz i wasnt really feelin the chorus, but it was still good

To The Top

I Was Feelin This Shit So Fuckin Much Dude, No Damn Joke. My Situation Ain't Like Yours, Only In A Way Tho. My Dad Used To Work All The Time, Come Home, Drink Beer, N Take Himself To Bed. That Was My Father Figure For The Longest Time. No Real Bonding Or Nothin, I Couldn't Really Gather Up Enuff Shit To Get A Real Connection With Um Till My Parents Split N I Say My Pops Cry For The First Time Cause My Moms Cheated On Him. . That Shit Hit Me Hard And From Then On, I Finally Got That Bond I Always Wanted.

Sorry Bout That Aus, Back To Ya Piece. The Emotions Jus Fuckin Jumped At Me, Shit Was Crazy On The Emotional Tip. I Don't Even Give A Fuck Bout Vocab Or Flow. The Imagery Protrayed, All The Emotions, And Jus The Piece As A Whole And It's Meaning Made It Fuckin Dope Man. Word Up, I Felt This Shit And Could Relate To It.

-Formula.

Really Appreciated Kid..
Its Cool Son.. Dont Worry Bout It..
I Just Wish I Had The Same Shit U Do
In A Way. But He Never Been A Father
Figure To Me Either.. The Originally Name
oF thE Song Was "Sperm Donor" Because
Thats All He Did.. Gave Up His Shit
But NEver Lived Wit The Concequences
So Very Much Appreciated Man

To The Top

N if dirty bag had a fukkin name, u defined it

wow that shit was fukkin dope as a mother fukker. my dad just left me and my mom and he is a prick and i could relate to a lot of that. damn dude i dont even know wat to say. that shit kept my jaw to the floor because i absolutely love rhymes with pure substance and that shit was more pure and deep than anythin ive read in a long time really dope drop dude seriously really dope

can i get some feedback

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=94198

To The Top

that was a tight Deep Piece.........i enjoyed tha read............LoL i was listening to the Instrumental of Eminem's Kim wheni read it........the beat fits it well u choose the right lyrics and beat but the chorus i wasnt feeling ya that much on.........all round 9/10.........

Aiight Peace Out Kuz (v)

it was pretty nice i can relate to it caws i been thru it same damn story same damn time same damn lies all it kid bare wit it keep writin itll release ya mind from all the forbidden memories holla..

Thanks.. Uppin

I read this whole piece bout 3 times now, its dope as fuck...

Really deep cause i have hgone through the exact same thing, my dad left before i was born and stillt ries to call me....

Nice piece....

pce

Thanks Bro

if you don't drop adequate feedback, this will be deleted by the end of the day

Me?

Dunny a most wanna hear on a audio track... shyt... this could be a real head kicker.. (eminem type ish)... you put it out there... the hook was well not the ILLEST... but hey its just a keystyle... good ish... big ups....on3