Cardboard Ordinance ft. Soulstice

1st - Passive
2nd - Soulstice

The people have been torn in two
As war wastes life and drains away
The future's hope from me and you
A stain of blood descends to stay
The proud hand which holds suffering
And leads but to decline and fall
Proud they sowed but harvest will bring
Disgrace unless we soon and all..
Stand free..
.
.
I'm trapped in a fashion of gore, where they live the strife of fasting
They had to stomach the chores if they wanted life everlasting
They slept in compact corners, abuse concluded in cracked sternums,
These acts blew into reenactments like the bruises on Nat Turner
We've choosed to look past, further, the news has unwrapped Earth..
..Of the truth that we slapped under the roof with the facts burning
Exclusive attacks - murder - the roots have attached and risen
The crew that is trapped in prison, has a youth that is half missin'
The booze, gives a bad vision, we've sparked war, then lit the fuse
He gave America their 'cut', gambled with troops, and can't fucking 'stitch the bruise'!
Fighting a civil war for a country, inducing innocent hearts with fear
U.S. crime rose to the sky; spot the truth when clouds start to clear
Hatred clings like a still stone that is gathering moss
How do we recover from brittle bones, and from this staggering loss?..
This man makes speeches to treaties, as the crying plummets
How come George Bush aids OUR country only when we're dying from it?
..In a war with no end, children with guns were never loved
What's this hype about ceased fire? Speaking of peace that never was. . .
.
.
Existence estranged as veins range from Mujahidin to Disney
Same Dante/Vigil visuals that were derived at the Cistine
Felons spying, evolving to hellions riding through the Vatican
Screaming "After them" and then begin using their gats again
Stagnant things, that desecrate many fates, and our offspring
Exalting the bombs spewing and wrongdoings. faulty
Dissolving a land where Sod's law is the last decree acknowledged
Timeline relapse, please gasp, to continue seeing the follies
Disease bleeding through bodies, as they stack up in Sudan
A land that sees no new man, in need of a true plan
or effluvium allurement?
As we invade Iraq, induced by petrol assurement! For the people!!
As we ignore the feeble! We scramble to monetary victories
As sovereign avarices lay upon condescending mysteries
A commen mesh of misery, a mesh of children locked in prisons
Reality and actuality encased in a prism of unbridled living
Lightning and vile winters, metaphors for the pre-apocalypse post show
Is a rapunzel hair noose right? Common tricks that only a ghost knows
hymns of the ocean, tsunami - as Mother Natures acquitted
Where is the blame placed! brother nation's are listed!
It's a subtle behavior so listen, through the disorder and strife
I suppose that death is the natural order of life..
.
.
How do you define ...peace?

Hello? Are you listening?

Mr. President? Sir...Mr. President!

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...32#post5064032
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...83#post5063583

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...wpost&t=307884
Me and ta2 tears collab ^

Passive- Damn! It's really nice to see your work man. I enjoyed your piece it was refreshing and worded nicely. This might be a good HoF piece here. I liked the imagery and the diction, it made a clear understanding to me what you were talking about. Great work here bud.

Soulstice- You always seem to hit ahrd with your topics, you did great as well. What a great collab this was. The styles are so different and I think that's what really helps. Soustice you use great wording in short lines and passive uses imagery in longer lines. What a nice piece overall from you as well!

Great work boys!

Hmm this was a pretty good piece in my mind.. the topic was played to some extent but you two did do a good job on it that's for sure..

Passive- You're structure scared me at first, because at first glance, your bars looked as though they were severely stretched, but once i started reading, i found that the lines flowed beatifully none the less. And while reading this, i could almost hear it in my head, and knew exactly how it would b said, with the purposeful tone of voice, you really got your message across well i think in your verse.. i believe your strongest point was the rhyming all together. The display of multis was outstanding and your rhyme scheme was interesting and kept my attention.. all rhymes were complex and difficult, and you let your true colors shine in this one... good work

Soulstice- Your verse was very well put together aswell i found, though i dont think you reached your full pontential on this one.. You're flow was consistent as usual, along with your unique approach on the subject, this verse turned out amazing. The only problem i had with the verse was that you seemed to be holding back in the rhyming categorie, unlike you usually do.. i saw words rhymed like "know" and "show", and i have read your writing before, and that's not like you at all.. i think you could put a little more complexity and effort into that category... But on the other hand, your strongest point in the piece was by far your spectacular vocabulary.. It was advanced, and in my perspective, your vocabulary is THE MOST superior on this site... well done none the less and keep up the writing

If you two could return the favor on my piece with Educated "You'll Never Know" it'd be greatly appreciated... good work.

erhum

thanks, favor returneduping

up.

Pass- This was a great read from you i havent really read much of your shit but your flow and structure was good. your imagery and emotion that you put into this was very good i loved the topic and the wya that you approaced it... very well written and your vocab was pretty good aswell overall i'd nom this for HOF

Soul- I havent ever read any of your pieces but im going to have to start reading more of them by what i saw here... your structure and vocab was deffintly onpoint. you both came with 2 different styles and they went together good... very well done and you stayed on the topic very well aswell..

EDIT: Well soul, if you want me to feed it, let me know but Passy here doesn't want me to so.. blah Talk to you guys later.

Don't bother leaving feed. I don't want to hear what you have to say, honestly.

Passive- This was very nice, you wrote extremely well here, you had great emotion and imagery. You made the read very enojyable and easy for the reader to get in to, I have to say, in all honesty I am not a fan of your previous work, and I'm not trying to diss you by saying that. But this peice was different for me, you really shone in this collab dude, I like the way you approached this topic. Nice job dude, I really enjoyed it.

Soulstice- dope as usual, I am a fan of your style, and I enjoy nearly all of your peices, so this wasn't really a surprise, but it was dope, you too had great imagery, and emotion. your approach to the topic was very good, and I was very impressed. Good job dude.

I really liked this peice, it had everything I could ask for in an OM, props to you both, you did a greta job. I think this may be my first HOF nomination this month.

Please return the favour.
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...34#post5068534

I'll get to that soon. Thanks.

Up.

Final up for the night.

feed on mine y0 ^

strange title. nice piece all in all tho. had some good flows poppin off. nothing much original in the concepts used but used well neway///////////////////////.......
nice layout and delivery of lines. both had dope multies littered througout the joint .. soul did excel somewhat in the flow and vocab department. just 1 or 2 words i thought was over the top and used well at that... but yeah was tite ass write f'sho. worked well indeed

pz1

thanks yo.

I don't know, it was a cool concept and idea, but I just couldn't really get into Pas's parts because of the similies and odd tenses. Soul on the other hand, I really like your section, lol however small it was. I mean, I dont know, I had a hard time staying with the verses, I just got bored and my attention shifted very easily. Sorry man, jsut wasnt entirely feeling it.

1 day later.