"A Misguided Youth"

Im here to post, I run on UK time. Lol.

"A Misguided Youth"

Born to a Jordanian town, that while quaintly profound and not greatly renowned ..
.. was rich in resolve,
Ahmed watched as his city evolved.
Often he’d cast a gaze over the vast array of placid grey ..
.. building’s that masqueraded, as the al-Ma’ssoum slum he had fast became -
Accustomed to.
Before he’d thrust his new, books into, ..
.. his carry-bag, and began the mile long journey on foot to school.
Ahmed was an indifferent student,
Who often would sit alone ..
.. His playground; The municipal cemetery opposite his home.
When mother found him kicking stones- “There’s nothing to do,” he would report,
.. Before she smacked him for scuffing the only shoes we could afford.
Ahmed hankered purpose,
His rebellious streak began to surface ..
.. and he turned juvenile delinquent, with intentions to leave this languid circus.
His gambit earnest,
At least up til his arrest where it’s proven -
An adult Ahmed was influenced by the Salafist-Jihadist Movement.
Captivated by the stories portrayed, in glorious ways ..
.. and local mosques, preaching radical Islam to all us who prayed.
Ahmed left for Kandahar, where he then made a pact ..
.. with bin Laden. The maniac, offering him a training camp.
It was here Ahmed changed his name, to one more common to you and me ..
Calling himself “Abu Musab al-Zarqawi”.
A name that strikes fear in our hearts to the beat of a taut drum,
“Abu Musab” meaning “Father of Musab” - His fourth son ..
.. “al-Zarqawi” because Zarqa’s the city he’s spawned from,
And from his Training Camp in Herat, his leadership was forth run.
With the invasion of Iraq,
And allied tanks roaming forth, in droves and hordes ..
.. al-Zarqawi chose to pour, his gross support, into igniting “Holy War”.
The primarial reason Zarqawi was known to state, over tapes …
.. was that “The great lie known as democracy,” diametrically opposed his faith.
When his ultimatums weren’t met, he would stick to his word ..
.. which led most noteably to the cruel be-heading of Nicholas Berg.
The U.S stripped and searched the Middle East’s continued plight ..
.. until finally,
they succeeded in killing him on June the ninth.

A tragic tale of misguided youth, yet those who do not know the past are doomed to repeat it.

Abu-Musab al-Zarqawi
October 22nd 1967 – June 9th 2006-06-17
Rest In Peace

http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/4...ile_zb_203.jpg

His gambit earnest,
At least up til his arrest where it’s proven -
An adult Ahmed was influenced by the Salafist-Jihadist Movement.
Captivated by the stories portrayed, in glorious ways ..
.. and local mosques, preaching radical Islam to all us who prayed.
Ahmed left for Kandahar, where he then made a pact ..
.. with bin Laden. The maniac, offering him a training camp.
It was here Ahmed changed his name, to one more common to you and me ..
Calling himself “Abu Musab al-Zarqawi”.
A name that strikes fear in our hearts to the beat of a taut drum,


woo. hell yeah sum tite ish.f'sho.
sure like the way you flow your shit..........you come up short a lot of times but this was Nice............topic was flipped well and in depth........shit was smooth to read. shit was graphic.... rhymes was 1....... yeah f'sho rythym was ace......vocab was yeah!

tite joint

stay1

Cheers bruh!
I put a lot into this piece, I wanted to show heads im not solely a STORYTELLER. I can go topical too, and I think it was important to do this, because while the younger members may not be fully aware of Zarqawi's past, they're aware of him. I thought this would give them a little insight into his life, he wasnt just suddenly a terrorist- Events in his life made him like that. He did, sadly, become a product of his environment. Its actually quite a tragic tale, and one point worth noting is that when he first came into contact with Osama - he actually REFUSED to be linked with Al-Qaeda. But yeah, im glad you enjoyed this. Booo at more of you not taking the time to respond after the effort I put in ..

^To be honest, this was a story, lol. A magnificent one at that. Well, I do see what you're saying. It was a topical (poetically message fulfilled) with your story telling ability. And you don't need to show heads anything, you're actually one of my favorite writers at the moment and I honestly don't really have any storytellers as my favorites. Anyway, this is one my favorite pieces up to date because I liked how you incorporated a message to the youth, a political statement, the United States' current, and a man's life and made it into a brillantly written piece. I think you're the only person I know who can write a very good story into like 26 lines. I could never do that. My topicals alone exceed more than 20 lines. Shits ridiculous. You made such a hated man look simply confused and forced into an unfortunate lifestyle due to manipulation while being a 'misguided youth'. Your knowledge about things is real cool. Someone from the UK who knows a lot about his surroundings. Anyway, I really thought this was good. very good.

Cheers Nique, its appreciated.

Where the REAL heads at? This has been slept on horribly. DaMn!

well cam, compared to your last OM, well the last i read a few days ago, this was much better, you can tell you spent the time on it... very descriptive, i like to see something revelvant to the world, yea tight

short reply, but...

...good read

Tight story. I like the concept, and the oepining of the scene is really good. the vocabu;ary was superb as well, with the word usage tying into it and making that camarac-patented flow scheme. which is really dope, buti never really liked how you just switched immediately rhyming.. ah well, maybe i jut read it differently.. anyways, you showed excellent knowledge of the whatever race/ethnicity/culture this was, and that impressed me. the constant refrences/allusions towards these middle eastern places with strange names shows great knowledge, but using them in your rhyme scheme shows mastery of flow. dope piece

hit up "Savior Serum?"

very nicely written, just about flawless. i really liked how you bring a point out in the open and drive it into our heads. You wrote this for what seemed to be a reason, and i think that reason deffinatly made it across. It's almost a sad story, but then again it's such a typical one. you turned an every day burden into a beautifully written story. i've never really read your work at all, and i doubt you've read mine, but this was really cool. loved the way you brought it out. flow rocks, vocabulary was nice, you used big AND small words and they all clashed with each other and fit exactly where they were put. Nice ish ..

- B. Nash

GOOD SHYT.. KEEP IT UP.. got me into it..

I Liked It, Except That Damn Al Queada Guy, Aahhhhh
No Really Though, First Good Thing Ive Read On Here

This should be in legends by now, but thanks - Everyone.

ill reply later with some indepth mate

Damn. I'm not easily impressed.. and this was moving. Well written, your execution of multi's here was flawless as one set of multis blended into the next, and not once was the story/topic sacrificed to keep the rhyming flowing.. not a topic many would venture into.. bravo Cam

HOF for sure..

Quote:

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Originally Posted by X.Cell

Tight story. I like the concept, and the oepining of the scene is really good. the vocabu;ary was superb as well, with the word usage tying into it and making that camarac-patented flow scheme. which is really dope, buti never really liked how you just switched immediately rhyming.. ah well, maybe i jut read it differently.. anyways, you showed excellent knowledge of the whatever race/ethnicity/culture this was, and that impressed me. the constant refrences/allusions towards these middle eastern places with strange names shows great knowledge, but using them in your rhyme scheme shows mastery of flow. dope piece

hit up "Savior Serum?"

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http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=297939 :D

I loved this peice. the flow was great. Creativity was welly done. The structre was nice. The wordplay was very mature. the story was great. 9-10. Keep it up Cam.

~Lex

Well done man. You are honestly my hero. I enjoy everything you drop. Everything is always written to near perfection. And there is always some meaning or some type of story that is very entertaining. Respect.

I do perfer reading stories, there's so much more twists and turns your piece can take. This was based on the topic of 'Misguided Youths'... but it detailed Abu-Musab al-Zarqawi's life story. So the two overlapped in a way.

I really liked the decision to write on this man. I thought he was just some random, notorious terriost who was killed, so the way you presented him was eye opening. The words you chose, and language you used, persuaded me into thinking he wasn't such a bad guy... or atleast gave me understanding into why he WAS such a bad guy.

This was very polished. I really enjoyed your last piece, but I don't think the use of multi's and internal rhymes matches the level you attained for this piece. I'm always amazed at how you are able to use all those multi's, while keeping strictly on topic.

Quote:

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When mother found him kicking stones- “There’s nothing to do,” he would report,
.. Before she smacked him for scuffing the only shoes we could afford.

---

^ I liked these two lines a lot, because of the use of dialogue. The imagery was really great in this part especially, because I could easily imagine this exchange occuring. The dialogue in the first line is realistic, it's cool you were able to use the multi at the same time. I like how you didn't force the speech in the second line, but I was still able to imagine his mother saying what you implied.

This was a joy to read. Deserving of legends, honestly. I would appreciate feed on -
Water Under the Bridge

Thank you, everyone. I was beginning to this this board was dead. Lol.

Shout outs to Evo for stopping through! I`ll respond to all of your links when I get a chance, and Eddy- remember to edit your reply in, bi-otch!

Again, thank you for the responses.

Peace!