With New Love, There`s Old Flames!

With New Love, There`s Old Flames…

– By Baron Mynd

http://imagecache2.allposters.com/im.../10121621B.jpg

She sang from the soul, with a voice that commanded control ..
.. and candidly strolled the stages circumference with an ambient glow.
Revelling in her glamorous role, as he seethed in the corner ..
.. watching her smile beam with the aura of a seasoned performer.
His hatred grew, as he waited through her ‘tasteless slew of grating Blues’ ..
.. Applause erupted, straight on cue, and he opted to make his move ..
***
Knowing it would take a few minutes before the curtain would fall,
He made an uncertain withdrawal…
…to backstage where he started searching the halls,
His hands fervidly toured the burgundy walls as his quest ensued ..
.. before it halted him like a pointed gun -

Her dressing room!

***
The sequestered brute rests his huge fingers on the handle’s brow ..
.. and her clicking heels rang aloud as she ambled down in her spangled gown.
With no time to hang around…
…this stark recluse, threw himself in the darkened room
Poor Cassandra had no idea what she was about to embark into ..
***
Slowly, she entered.

She ventured a brief sense of relief as she pondered the Saturday ..
.. whilst discarding the auburn hairpiece she’d donned for the cabaret,
The thankful throngs at the matinee had brought tears to her eyes ..
.. When suddenly-
A tall figure near to her right, gave her a fearful surprise!
He covered her mouth with his palm,
Remaining resoundingly calm ..
.. as he grabbed for her neck, pulled out a knife, and savagely stabbed her to death.


This is from the RSTL this week, my opponent no-showed, lemme know what you think!

Peace.

Replied to Soulstice and Evolve`s latest works. :)

Leave links with your replies and i`ll get at those too,

Peace!

goddamn, the first stanza had megatonic superpyscho inners, it flowed silkily perfecto, thats just a big wow, man.. good multisyllabic rhyming and the word usage was great, nice description as well. To be honest, as linear as this piece would look as a whole, it threw me off, because i thought he was going to rape her... so the end suprised me, good job.. overall: tight piece, little short, but still nice, keep at it

Honestly i also thought he was going to rape her. But it seemed to me this ending to soon. I needed a longer peice from you. It would've been ill as fuck. It's still ill just short.
But overall dope peices. this whole part.
She sang from the soul, with a voice that commanded control ..
.. and candidly strolled the stages circumference with an ambient glow.
Revelling in her glamorous role, as he seethed in the corner ..
.. watching her smile beam with the aura of a seasoned performer.
His hatred grew, as he waited through her ‘tasteless slew of grating Blues’ ..
.. Applause erupted, straight on cue, and he opted to make his move ..

is ill as fuck

Holla at mine.

Una Palabra ft Daz

pZ

WOW!...this a was a fuckin nice drop homes. nice emotion and delivery that blended and the story telling GOD DAMN!...nice. it kept me interest and on my toes through the whole piece but like what DAZ said it was too short homes..it could have been a perfect piece but its shortness slacked your piece!. your multies and vocab just was a great added asset to this drop along with the intro and closer!

Up, up and away!

I dont like you anymore. You always have these pieces that arent finished .. yet are masterful. From now on you are no longer allowed to drop unfinished pieces. This was dope man. Your flow & word choice are as close to perfect as can be. Imagery is always on point. JUST FINISH THE DAMN THING NEXT TIME!!!!

^ Haha. I actually had up until like... the last 'stanza' wrote already, but when I browsed my battle at RM, my opponent hadnt showed up, so I just quickly threw the last part together. Im in the #1 Contendership match this week at RapMusic, hoping to bring the title back to RB :^)

This was good...very good...as your OM's always are...

But this one ended blah...very rushed...too fuckin quick.

What happened?

Quote:

---

She sang from the soul, with a voice that commanded control ..
.. and candidly strolled the stages circumference with an ambient glow.
Revelling in her glamorous role, as he seethed in the corner ..
.. watching her smile beam with the aura of a seasoned performer.
His hatred grew, as he waited through her ‘tasteless slew of grating Blues’ ..
.. Applause erupted, straight on cue, and he opted to make his move ..

---

Dammit, that was crazy. Absolutely AMAZING story. I wanted this to go on, maybe into another stanza, or another chapter into the storyline you are writing to. The topic was ver original, I love the quote you used for it. If you came up with that witty expression, then I gotta hand it to ya. I also thought the man was going to rape her, but instead...just stabbed her to death...ended it cleanly. Too bad it didnt go any further, I would've loved to know what would happened next. Its your choice though, you're a great writer, and I loved this shit. Peace.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=292338

This was really dope cam, the flow was insane. You always seem to have perfect wording on all of your lines to fit exactly what u want it to say. Its crazy. Dope story, but like what everyone was saying, i wish it would have been longer. Great drop Cam, keep it up.

http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=291054

I liked this peice. kinda short but really good.
Imagery was excellent thoughout this whole peice.
Flow was smooth and i was feeling that.
Vocab and complexity was nice as well....
Overall this was a really good peice....

wow this shit was dope as hell i like the flow and really went wit the emotion...the wordin was really nice this just made me want to read it more it was off the chain nice drop

Gyeah!

Not much to criticize. Struggling to come up with something to say that differs from what has already been said. The murder didnt really come as a suprise to me. It was apparent that the dude hated her rather than wanting to gain some sort of forced gratification. Flowed to perfection, you seem to always use the best words in the best places. I could say that it was too short. But in reality this was perfect length. .and I only wanted it to go on and on. I could criticize consistency, mainly because of the dizzying heights you achieved with the first stanza. Wtvr, you are an exceptional storyteller. .and I agree with whoever nominated this for HOF.

this was a very nice peice,you had everything in this,although I have seen better.....you had a nice structure and it was very easy to read,the flow was very good, I have only read a few of your peices and I have loved every single one of them,and beilieve me when I say,not a lot of people have me loving their writing. I think you may have rushed the ending, it seemed like you just couldn't be bothered to write anymore so you finished it as quick as you could, but it still turned out fine in my eyes...nice peice,keep at it

Second Coming, bitches!

leave feed on my OM 'Two sides of a fight' it may be long,but I don't think it will be a wasted read

thnx

Well, the kid who said it was an amazing story lied. It was only a decent story. BUT the piece itself was damn good. You took an average ass topic that I wouldn't have even read (or at least replied to) had someone else written it & made it a good read. Excellent flow, while maintaining the storyline. Good use of imagery btw. If you would put your talents to use on a better topic & went into it further, easily legends every time.

Pz!

Yeah, like I said - I rushed it towards the end, and the RSTL league is currently defunct, lol, just as I was starting to get back into writing topically too ..

Oh well, fear not, I`ve re-joined the league at PR and will probably post those pieces here for RB`s perusal when I get round to it .. Thanks for the peepage, all of you. It is appreciated.

Pz!

The concept was creative and the scenery u set was kept me interested so good job with the imagery. The usage of words with the rhymescheme was so smooth and easy to read... the rhymes were complex with great multies. The presentation was pretty much great and i liked the ending even tho it's claimed to be unfinished. This was cool, but maybe something a lil bit more creative would have been better instead of her getting stabbed to death.. u know if it would had been strangled by a shoe-lace or something you would be able to bring out so much more emotion and drama.

good shit man, can u please return the favor in my sig there's a link to my most recent open mic "is it a sin to kill an insect?"

I like your shit cam, i read your pieces alot but mostly dont have time to leave feed.

I think your concepts are dope, kinda unusual but it makes it more intresting. You got a real good flow, just makes the whole piece come together real nice and its an easy read. Good use of emotion but it seems like its kept to this certain calmless (cant really explain it) even the last couple of last lines, where in terms its violent are better read softly, its just real good. Plus your vocabulary is spot on most times, sometimes i think peeps overuse vocab but you use it at the right time and it makes for a better read.

Overall a real good piece, not the best i've read from you but still dope lad.

I liked this alot... Seems different from you typical work though. I think it lacked as creative of a flow as I've grown acustomed to seeing you produce. It really doesnt matter though because the flow on this was still very strong and held itself consistantly. The story, on point with every other story you fabricate... Detail is just immaculant and every emotion and image is described to a tee. The only thing I didn't like was the length, I always feel like Im getting jipt when I reed an Om from you... Because it's always either really short or unfinished. I think a full lengthy piece from you would be amazing, I'm really hoping to see one soon. But, this was a great piece regardless of my minor complaints. Loved it.

It'd be dope if you could return the favor on my new Om,
In the Shadows of the Livingroom
Thanks alot, I really apreciate it.

Im working toward something 'long-ish' lol. I used to write 100-line novels, but that was when I had only a basic grasp of rhyme scheme, so it was much easier to do. A lot of my old work was simplistic A, B multies at the end of bars and start of the following bar, which was good at its time - but nowhere near the level of work I produce now. And while some may not like the length, it is REALLY hard to pull out a piece of great length with THIS level of complexity. No matter who you are! Lol. But yeah, I have a number one contendership match this week at a rival board and it looks certain to become an epic. Im still toying with this 'new' style at present, which could be another factor in the lengths of my recent stuff, but im working on it. Glad to know you're all with me!

Thanks,

- CamZilla.

Think you could hit that favor for me man?

what can I say.. extremely well written, and each line was executed beautifully.. the flow was smooth and dramatic, I think you conveyed the exact mood you were shooting for.. couldn't have been done better imo.

nice work.