30 - 40 lines
Topic = The Greatest Gift
Checkin and drop by Sunday
No D/R votes
No Unexplained votes
Blah Blah Blah
Yall know the rest
Good Luck
30 - 40 lines
Topic = The Greatest Gift
Checkin and drop by Sunday
No D/R votes
No Unexplained votes
Blah Blah Blah
Yall know the rest
Good Luck
check up
1 to the 2
CheCC............g/l.........
The first day of school, the impressions would carry on :coolio:
On the ride my dad decided to blast some Shania songs
I said turn that crap down but he smiled and blared it louder
I opened the door and ran out leaving wit Can you be cool for an hour
As I socialized my dad came up and said I forgot a bye kiss
he left me with that and a hug, my friends never stopped the diss
When I arrived home my parents asked how my day was I exploded in two
They yelled back but I replied with parents most dreaded words "I Hate You"
All The yelling ceased as they stood, their eyes dulled, spirits diminished
Silence signified all the confusion had started but the fight had finished
The next day as I woke from bed, my fathers smile no longer gleamed
His words were few and lifeless, my mom even refused to be seen
With my folks gone my status rose as I tormented others for theirs blunders
But I missed how my dad would yell my name with conviction and love booming like thunder
My life seemed better socially but for my parents happiness Id trade it all
Yet my emotions I never revealed until I was home in my bed curled in a ball
A week later form the incident it was 3:46 my parents unusually late
It was the week before Christmas, thoughts of presents fueled me to patiently wait
The nurse said I need to come into her office quick, I muttered "Oh great"
Little did I know my ignorance paid the price for a section of twisted fate
the call informed me my mom distracted by my former words, hysterical, crashed
The 5 days in the hospital, my dads back turned towards me as she slowly passed
my guilt consumed me totally but I held it in, my dad didn’t even leave the house
one day coming home, the yard was crowded wit objects, my dads rage over the loss of a spouse
I ran out of the car showered with tears showing my fears I had tried to suppress
I looked through the boxes like there was redemption and love but there was none left
A note in blood confirmed my suspicion, my heart gave way as I read(red)
"YOUR HATE HAS RUINED EVERYTHING, I HATE YOU, YOU BROKE MY HEART, SHE DEAD
NOW LEAVE OR YOUR DUE WILL COME, DECIDE YOUR END" crushed me as I cried to above
Lost God's greatest gift, my center for living ,my life gone without unconditional love..........
.
.
.
As black skies - crack open clouds cascade forth -sacred waters
Raindrops dancing on rooftops serenade Earth’s arid creatures
The deepness of my thoughts reaches each spiritual dimension
Life grows while the Sun and Moon work in lateral conjunction.
We start as fertilised spawns… attached through the umbilical
Cocooned within the womb for nine months, birth is a miracle
So, it’s shameful when the blameless meet with a painful end
And, instead of love people act with - a most disdainful trend
I just wish we could bend-the-rules… then exist for eternity
Jumping aboard trains to wherever this journey carries me
Birds chanting tunes to my ears, melodies of hope and elation
My eyes are the stars; blessings are gems for each can glisten
Listen for the vibration of the world heartbeat… as it ticks
Time passes, quick as a flash the future turns, plus it twists
I clench fists to fight the reaper with if death tries to stalk
Ever walking the walk, stirring thought driving the wise to talk
Genesis reports how humankind was grafted in God’s image
Woman then came from part of man, erected from Adams rib
Raised from the crib, children of Heaven bear light on shadows
Still peril follows the tracks of many mortal saints and heroes
Imagine being -murdered for speaking your mind in public…
Picture your powerful words leading to state crimes & conflict
Walk amid the riots… as fire kindles looters with shooters
Politics instigates dirty tricks… the truth is shit’s ruthless
Since authorities kill killers, can two wrongs make a right?
We didn’t stem from gorillas, that’s a fallacy fake & hype
A - Bacon tripe meaning to living “life” believing the bull
They keep deceiving the dull… looks like population control
Took its toll, now some think power is the greatest gift to hold
Even though death spreads like mould in a forest of toxic toads.
Living is more than gold, a gift to cherish,
Why is all corruption nowadays so devilish?
Sometimes I wish the good didn’t perish
For life in itself is surely the greatest gift.
Immagery-vortex
Flow-vortex
Vocab-vortex
Complexity-vortex
Overall enjoyment-vortex
v-vortex for the reasons above
both came hard
SIX6 had the flow and structure but Vortex came with the imagenary and creativity...I really enjoyed reading both verses, but Vortex verse was the one I could really see happenin' in my mind,that was sum tight shit...Also Vortex wordplay, vocabualry and complexity was pretty damn good...SIX6 had a decent verse and I prolly lose against it but Vortex just came better, that's my opinion
Vote Vortex, (keep it up u 2)
i gotta disagree with the majority of the voters and say six took it he had a better flow and he put alot of feelings in his, vortex urs wasnt wack u had emotions too its just that i was feelin six's verse more, he made my eyes watery nah im playing but he made me think about what u should say to people even though u dont mean it aight so this goes to six for a better overall verse aight
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyrical Damage
the fuck outta here with the hatred.. your view means nothing chump.. you cant vote antway.. and if you could i'd just get it DQ'd 4 str8 hate n Dick Riding
motherfucking upz
UPPin...........votes
aiight i thought this battle was pretty sic vortex and six had a tie in verses i like them both but i would have to go wit six for nice flow structure and complexity...no hate vortex u had all tht shit to but i liked six's betta aiight 1
v-six
i felt both stories...
it is really hard to decide bcuz it is soooo damn close
topic-
6-10
v-10
imaginary-
6-10
v-6.2
vocab-
6-8.2
v-9.3
emotion-
6-9.2
v-7.8
structure-
6-10
v-10
v/6
not by much.
Yo both of yall did a really good job with ya pieces here.
I just felt dat Vortex took this to a different level here. Six no disrespect homie but I just think he killed it on this shit man. The similies and parodies just did it fo me. I felt like Vortex completly took this topic and made it into a total mind fuck.
V/Vortex
tight ass topical yall
-props- to both
vortex had it locked on the creative side
it was a tight spit n well thought out
but i can relate to 6 better with his drop
plus he showed much more emotion
better flow n the image is still stuck inside
my head
v - 6
this topical battle should be legendary. six you had a better flow. you stayed on topic, plus you had showed alot of emotion.the imagry was amazing, the concept was ok, and the structure was not that great..8.7/10.vortex you had an ok flow, ok structure"better" you had a good imagry as well. the concept was very clear,and understandable 8.3/10
v/six6 ... very close tho
UppIn votes............ppl.............woRD<
a yo dis was a hot battle but vortex took dis one wit da personalz so he got my vote iight holla
Vortex and six6 both ma dogs, but King_Of_Flowz what ya mean when ya say more personals, what this is a topical aint it
vocab = draw
wordplay = six6
structure = draw
flow = draw
\/= six6
Oh shit i read both pieces - aight heres what i thought
Six - your shit was deep - i liked how ya presented this topical - ya had a creative storyline - ya kinda swayed off the point a lil but ya finished it well......
Vortex - nce peace i think six had better storyline but your piece stood out more to me because it was more creative - also ya stayed on topic the whole time
both of yall did a good job and i like both pieces
but i would have to vote for Vortex for the reason above
sorry to both of you i dont have enough post but very close and good battle both of ya keep up the hard work
vote = vortex
Immagery-vortex
Flow-vortex
Vocab-vortex
Complexity-vortex
Overall enjoyment-vortex
wow, this was a really close battle.
VOCAB: V
Rhymes: six
Flow: v
Imagry:six
topical: six
i thought six wrote about a better, or greater gift. you guys both had kick ass rhymes and flow but i though six had a slightly better verse.
uppin a few honest votes.. dont be silly.. just be real thats all.. no big rush.. read both pieces properly if you have time... keep it 1
hey yo if i could vot ill vote for vortex crew for better hitz n better rhymes
a yo dis was a hot battle but i cant vote not enuf post iight fo sho
aiite yeah good looks out.. thanx 4 reading yo.... no more crew votes from 6 crew please.. ie professional..gansta deciple.and maybe that other dude with funny name
uppings
explained non crew votes only!
UUpin this Shitt...............word<<
bump
cough
oh well looks my last up
come on peeps dont let this go cold dead
SIX6 dqued banned