Sci-fi vs. Reality

Forget disaster, I don’t care if the sphere goes BOOM!
Then all that’s left on the surface is a nuclear mushroom
As I die drowning in this doom, burdened with spiteful sin
This is my rightful end, sliding to Hell when the sky falls in
Even Lucifer don’t like me, see he’s never given me shit
Living in the same boat as the broke ever feeling seasick
So defend your borders with a battalion of reptilian guards
It’s not my concern if the earth crumbles to a billion shards
God I lost faith, life left scars on my psychosomatic state
My soul is a result of society: fuelled by cold erratic hate
Untold prophecies of a tragic fate, making the feeble faint
Envision green skies & red rivers painted in deceitful taint
Fiends touch angel dust pressures influx war spills erupts
Men kill for lusts, the hungry fight over no-thrill products
Acid rain leaks fill ducts; pollutions reach obscene peaks
The ozone’s already fucked it’s too late for green-peace
Imagine clones machine freaks linked in synchronization
Thinking same thoughts spare-parts’ our last destination
The scrapheap melted in trapped heat recycled as robots
Could this be the future reality or just a mythical paradox?




This Sci-fi vs. Reality

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=234611
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=233738

links

Damn that was dope a loved the complexity of this peac nice wordplay and decent vocab always help keep postin shit like this

thanks for peepin still bro

uppin this ish

^><><><^

You outta cum join Ill R Us we got a str8 roster

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=235076
But If you post in here take out your karakte kick sig makes you look like a herb

that is one hell of a crazy message and the piece really got me thinking the words used fit perfectly

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mcl

that is one hell of a crazy message and the piece really got me thinking the words used fit perfectly

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safe bruv


upz

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Elavated

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=235076
But If you post in here take out your karakte kick sig makes you look like a herb

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NO! i dont wanna be in your crew

come on this is worth more than a couple one line feeds

after all the fukken feed i giv out

up this fucker

I liked the concept it was original so i'll give you props for that plus you actually did this concept justice. Your vocab was used well but you overused it in some parts espically towards the end. Try and keep that vocab at the level youve got it but try not to make your rhymes too cryptic(Hard To Understand) cause the average person who reads this is another gonna find a lot of it gibberish. But the vocab worked well cause you created some nice imagery and you brought up some deep questions in this piece so this was an impressive piece. The structure was fine but i dont give a fuck about structure when you do audios bar structure dont mean shit.
Another thing i noticed about this piece was the flow it wasnt as nice as your previous pieces so try and keep that flow more consistent.

Return the feed on my new om id appreciate it:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=235527

Man this was some El-P shit right here. Very complex in the concept as well as the structure was tight and not scattered all around. Also you kept things eerie, I like that kind of energy in rhymes. All in all, good piece man.

good looking out warchild and madhatt5er

but warchild this vocab is far from too complex or over the top

if peeps cant read it str8 they should peep a dictionary or just stay retarded, i dont gi a fucki.. and as far as im concerned the flow is air-tight you gotta read it at the right pace.. which is fast


uppins


up

i enjoyed this piece..i agree with the vocab...it was just right for you to understand and make your verse more complex without goin over the top..but i do think 1-2 bars were uneven with flow compared to the rest of the verse..your concept was nice, i liked your imagery about the pollution n stuff...you coulda probably extended your verse but thats ok..your multis were really nice, fav bars:

So defend your borders with a battalion of reptilian guards
It’s not my concern if the earth crumbles to a billion shards
^^flowed perfectly right there

overall i'd say this was dope...keep writin..oNE

im feelin this. its thoughtful, kinda scary really. good creativity. luvin the rhymin.
{As I die drowning in this doom, burdened with spiteful sin
This is my rightful end, sliding to Hell when the sky falls in}

that was my favorite part... luv your words... keep writing

aiite last bump n im out
leave yo link n ill reply

up tiddly up upz

up digady uppetys

I liked the phrase, battalion of reptilian guards. It had a good sound, and worked where it was placed. Having a religious aspect didn't seem forced. Solid use of a question to end the piece. Structure was straight. Being specific with colors helped with imagery.
Thanks for hitting up my piece.

safe blud

up

bump

cough

this was a good peice good choice in wordplay could use more vocabs and a pretty good flow keep it up

yo that was crazy man o mean that in a good way keep up the good work

:emerge: aiite good looks.. you could elaborate a little more on the feeed tho

lol

uppies