Mirrored Blood ft. Foreshadow

1st - DeNiILL
2nd - Foreshadow

Mirrored Blood
A Mistake...

Satan, grim, bloodcurdling reapers and killers
Insanity and profanity is growing deeper within her
A booze to sip stirs fluent craze, and a devil appears
a sudden mother has a swing, and out comes a rebel feared
picking up the sharp knife, grabbing the handel so fierce
with a deadly intention to take a life by a stab and pierce
Her sisters betrayal, sparked a womens craze from inside
a black coat with a jagged blade, and a fast plum ride
Peeling 100 down foster drive, pupils glued to the street
jeepers creepers aflow the speakers, a bass vibrating the seat
a rotten intention to follow, but a self order she must do
get revenge on a disceptive sister, and impale the knife through
.
.
arriving at the dark house, one room lit with a bearing flame
standing with a devils eye out on the porch of mary jane
.
.
.
A gust of sudden rage lurks behind my heart, past love
Looking at Mary's house deranged, what do I ask of?
I barge through the door, looking, searching for Mary Jane
With a insane cerebral image of stabbing a wound with max pain
I hear a noise from the bedroom... I creep along the shadows
Desperate to feel blood among my fingers & a stomach so shallow
A restless sleeper always rolls over to torment & torture
I pierce the sheet that covers her body & bring to life, The Order
I hear her last words & I dread the truth knowing it's false
I'm completely appalled but the mirror is where God forgives all
Knowing I have scorned Mary Jane's life by cutting at it with haste
I look closer into the mirror & see the sheet covering Baileys face

..Judy's last words before putting the knife in her own heart were

You were everything to me I never meant to hurt you in such a way
Bailey my child, I love you & I'm sorry this was your fated day

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=216441
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=216010

?

bump, buh buh bump bah bump

This was dope.
I liked the imagery from both and i felt emotion through out it.
The rhyming was great and made it all flow well.
The story-line was crazy and the way u collabed was interesting because it all connected well.
keep this shit up.
peace.

Thanks ES Uppin...

Uppin........................

this wasnt bad at all a nice little collabo...
cool concept
both had nice imagery - had ya wondering whats coming next shits nice
acouple misspelled words but nothing major
the emotion was nice also a lot of passion....plenty there
nice and decent vocabulary by both.definately feeling this not too bad nothing really wrong with this piece

i was feelin this. u should spell check every now adn then though
but i liked the way the vocabulary fit with the flow good shit

Thanks, Upp

This was a very nice piece fam....Imagery, metas and other literary techniques we used to a very high level in this...Flow was very nice - easy to read, nice use of vocab - juss an overall nice piece y'all - keep doing it!

Thanks up.......

Word, Up

Upppppppp

jeez

nice collab

you and foreshadow have the same style and both simplify the second line with uncomplex rhyming schemes. Ya'll like the same poets lol. Should partner up or something. Anyway nice read..try maknig your lines more complex. Or ya rhyme scheme.

Pz

Def. Nice Vocab & Descriptions...Flow Was Crazy, Emotion Was Pretty Good..

All In All A Very Nice Piece...Props To Both!

a nice collab, i was feelin this, it was detailed and that is good, and you had good structure, didnt do too much with every line just kept it basic but it was hott

i give that high marks
keep writin fams much love l8r 1

very nice collaboration... no need to up the vocab or rhyme scheme, they both went together perfect..
One of the dopest peices ive seen on this site...
Check out My Drop :.Apollo.: and give me some feedback

peep my battle as well if ya don't mind... it needs some votes

very dope....the emotion was immaculate....i loved tha wordplay and the slight bit of complexity you used which did accent this piece very well....like i said the emotion was mos def there....rhye scheme and flow...very tight....i loved tha ending...good twist....both of yall used real vivid imagery....very ill drop...keep droppin tha hottness.~1`

good scheme and i liked the idea :yes:

i aint a killa but dont pushme
revenge is like the sweetest thing nexta gittin pussy

yeah this was real good i could feel your emotion and what is it to say
execpt it was flames

^shush