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...Massacred...
Rock/Rap. Dont think of it with a traditional hiphop beat. Its intentionally short.
Frozen in the depths of my heart
A chilling picture paints itself
Tearing my tepid life apart
How can you live with yourself?
You massacred what I have left
Squeezing every inch of my breath
Suffocating me into a endless void
Look at me & what you’ve destroyed
Battling thru the field of flowers
Each one reminding me of you
& what could have been ours
If we had kept our love true
You massacred what I have left
Squeezing every inch of my breath
Suffocating me into a endless void
Look at me & what you’ve destroyed
My blood spilled thru the sacred hatred in your eyes...
Your calling me...calling me to die & never arise...
My goodbyes are phoney but I’m lonely without you near...
I’m calling you...calling you to appear & conquer my fears...
My ears can’t hear paranormal signals you transmit to me...
A ghost calling...calling your resistance to give in to me...
Please sing to me with lullabies of cradles destined to fall...
You called upon me...called upon me to forgive you if I recall...
Massacring...Forgiving...how can I keep living without you...
Singing...Thinking...always and forever about you...
You massacred what I have left
Squeezing every inch of my breath
Suffocating me into a endless void
Look at me & what you’ve destroyed
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real nice man... short and dope, the imagery in this piece was sweet, the chorus was a real nice add to it, i felt you should've tried to put in more internals and multies, but it was ok, since the imagery was quite dope multies werent really needed alot in this piece... the main verse had a few sick parts, quite good..
all in all, this was decent, hit this up in return man..
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=171622
peace
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Yo I liked this one. Showed real emotion and had good lines. And the concept was different aand struck me as being real poetic in its structure and flow.
Was more of like a rap poem and it came out well.
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This was a real nice piece R.T....The reason why i thought it was so good was because it had a blend of so many things in it...It wasn't like a standard piece...It was a poetic, rhymin, sing-song verse...it was very diverse not alot of what you see nowadays...I havent read anything from you since i left RB but i can see you havent lossed your touchh one bit...ill piece...much respect...
Battling thru the field of flowers
Each one reminding me of you
& what could have been ours
If we had kept our love true
These lines were so simple but withem you can picture so much...ill...
Thank you for your reply to my piece...comin from a vet it meant alot...peace...
-E-
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Perception.. This was a nice piece... I havent seen you in a while... But this was cool in the beginning I thought that this had more of a poetry feel but you picked it up... Nice work I'm feeling this stay active...
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i coulda swore this was a poem at first lol but then it turned out it coulda been alotta things and it was good nice imagery could have had more multi's but you gets lots of respect from me
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damn short and tight at the same time dawg
good flow on this one adn good imagery.....kinda like a poem
like yo structure nikika!!!
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This was a nice piece.. I enjoyed reading it and really felt the words... Nice flow... Good vocab.. It was a good combination that you worked with well. The storyline was written well and was made better by the imagery. It's a shame not many people have read or left feedback to this because it's a nice piece.
Thanks for the constructive and good feedback to Messiah Complex. I appreciate it.
Peace
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