16-20 lines
No Crew, Hate,...The Regular No Votes
Topic: Dream
^^ New Topic..got it from SS...thought it was easy for both of us to write bout quick.
After Check In Drop Your Verse. A.S.A.P
Printable View
16-20 lines
No Crew, Hate,...The Regular No Votes
Topic: Dream
^^ New Topic..got it from SS...thought it was easy for both of us to write bout quick.
After Check In Drop Your Verse. A.S.A.P
checkin in...............................
waiting for u to drop shun...............................
peace...............................
iight i'm checkin in....i'm droppin after school..
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The mortality of my self inflatuation is to help guide me
but who is there to provide the initiative to help my destiny
So I sit back with my eyes closed to the window of thoughts
Reaching out for a positive gift that helps me turn the clocks
Nobody helps me, I dont need the support I have my dreams
They help me..grow..breath..live..conquor..by any means
Patiently I awaite the happiness to flow as fast as water
Down my viens to my face to show my dreams are my father
They were there for me sence the begging never left a child
I thought of falling to the hands of god..I dreamed an smiled
Riabilated every aspect of grief because of the energy obtained
From the passion desire every sweat and tear uncontiained
Still the desire remains but i live to drive further then heavons
Take dreams as they come..to over come thought..a true blesson
Dreams have guided me..never let me down..help me to achieve
Created a road untaken..gave me another lung..to easily breath
...an all i ask for in return...
Is the satisfication of my life to revolve around the.......
......thank you..............
for my ability to dream...
Hurry up and drop yours....that was keyed in 8 minutes...lets go...
do u not understand the fuckin rules...hurry up..are ye dropen a pre-write or some wack shit fuck
c'mon man the rules specificaly said drop a.s.a.p
WTF.. u said ASAP.. so how can i post As Soon As Possible if im not on the net 24/7 like you? stfu, here's a keystyle for ya wack ass, i just logged on.......
At night time I cast a sphere around the Earth as we pass to darkness..
But I see through the dark with glasses, and my dreams begin with laughing bastards...
& a god from the heavens, and they tell me a bomb will drop at the seven..
So the clock ticks on the willow, im in a comotosed dream with a strong grip on my pillow..
There's a person in the dream, hes a freak, and he's kissing my window...
But he turns to a beautiful lady and says with her lips shes got a story to tell..
But it's boring as hell, and i offended her so she casted me onto the porch with a spell...
She takes me through life, about 4 different stages by eight in the night..
She shows me my mother dying but makes me weight with patience and fright...
My heart is aching and tight, and she says its how she feels every day of her life..
It's how she felt when I called her a freak, she gets it all day and all through the week...
And seeing my mother dye is like her life being seen through her eyes...
But as I wake up im greatful, because my dreams are my teacher of life..
Done.
...man calm down...i was just buggen....lol
fuck lol
good vberse though man....good luck....ass hole lol
Shit....
This is the first topical battle I've ever read and it was pretty good
Rule: your concept, well sorry but it bored me.........your vocab was good, but you lacked multi's....structurally you were good
Fame: your ideas kept me hooked, you had good multis, tight structure and over all better verse than rule...nice drop
Good shit by both but Fame took it by a step
Vote: Fame
sorry I can't poll, but please vote on this
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...hreadid=104306
the concept is unique if you read it...and understand it
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uppen
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haha people mustnt like voting on topics........... uppin............................................. .....
Rule...
Hmm, your verse was good but it seemed that while you were going to imagry, you feel short or were trying to hard to paint the picture that you wanted to say. Your flow was iffy at time, you can tell where...here..and here...throw it off if the whole piece doesnt have the consitencey of it.
Street...
Your verse definetly had a more abstract feel to it. Technically your verse was better i.e. multies, flow, rhyme scheme but i didnt like it. The way you rhymed was a style iv never seen but didnt enjoy very much. Your approach was very dream induced in how if unfolded.
Vote - Street
While rule's verse was a more enjoyable read, Street took it in the actual writing of the piece
rule won
street fame i wasnt feelin ur shit.............................................. ...............
Read Voting Rules!!! Vote Gone
-Token
me niether i never read these battles but was bored tonight so votin on everythin
rule=ur shit was hot i think it was deep son but it was like too deep and i didn't like it sometimes like u was sayin some mumbo jumbo shit i didn't like
street fame=i liked ur story it was tite and more clearer and on point i liked the shit how u see ur mom's death and wake up that shit is deep son i liked it and urs was way more enjoyable
vote=street
yte are u a fuckin idiot just votin like dat without droppin feedback u fuckin dumbass........................................... .......................
yte girls vote has been reported to IR
poll will be fixed..................................
.................................................. .........
yte don't vote on my battle again unless you explain your self dumb ass
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last uppen
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uppin this.............................................. .................................................. ...........
what the fuck, c'mon lets get this damn battle finished.......................................... .........................
Quote:
Originally posted by The Realist
Rule...
Hmm, your verse was good but it seemed that while you were going to imagry, you feel short or were trying to hard to paint the picture that you wanted to say. Your flow was iffy at time, you can tell where...here..and here...throw it off if the whole piece doesnt have the consitencey of it.
Street...
Your verse definetly had a more abstract feel to it. Technically your verse was better i.e. multies, flow, rhyme scheme but i didnt like it. The way you rhymed was a style iv never seen but didnt enjoy very much. Your approach was very dream induced in how if unfolded.
Vote - Street
While rule's verse was a more enjoyable read, Street took it in the actual writing of the piece
Imma have too go with what was said here aight....................
it sums up what needs to be said.......................
vote/street..............................aight......... ........................
peace............................................. .good battle............
Upping, I Think Ive Only Got One More Left.............................................. ...................
ya i think street won this it was a lil abstract at times like too abstract like you were reachin the point of insanity....but it was there it was on point i like how you made it seem dreamlike by switching scenery cause dreams do jump around like that and shit..
RUle - nice verse man i get the approach you took up i just wasn't feelin it as much i think you keyed it a bit to fast and he put more thought into his don't mean he better than you just means he put in the work.....hit this up plz thanx...
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=106645
I think that rule won this one. He seemed more serious wit his verse, and it was on a higher level. Not taking anything away from street but his seemed more of a sick twisted nightmare, than a dream.Still good though.
VOTE_RULE
open battle
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=105535
okay score is 4-1 my way... i think this is my last upping, so ill leave it up to the voters to do the job now and keep this thread surfaced........ good luck for the rest of the way Rule, good battle which ever way it goes
peace
sorry mods but this needs to be upped again, i voted but nobody returned the favor so ive got no other option
one
cmon lets get this damn battle finished...................................
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it...you can't vote like that....take that vote away....
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haha this shit is never going to finish lmfao........................................