"Many Faces"

"Many Faces"

You struggle..

To say you need some help,
Not to achieve anything, but to be yourself,
Free to tell all your dreams...never knocking your fears,
Without the odd looks, stares, or being mocked by your peers,
Yet we’re robbed of our years, tears, and we’re left just waiting,
Until our shorter life span leads to desperation,
We accept and face it;
Our hearts aren’t designed to cover, the lies
But yet we try to sustain disguised as others,
Our lives, our mind discovered..
Hoping our pride recovers, but the
Buried soul experiences the likes to suffer,
And it hides, eating inside, the slightest supper,
Then we’re unlikely to fight, so in spite, it’s tougher
You sigh and hover..
Over something you never claimed to hassle,
Instead you stayed in the darkness, and became a shadow
A shameful battle, but to a humbled degree,
Between who you are, and who you always wanted to be,
Then we’re astonished to see..
When the lack of honor unfolds,
Because what you fronted to be, you can no longer control,
And the longer it goes; The worse it will seek..
And ooze out through your eyes, and the words that you speak
Then we’ll have the last laugh..you’ll be the first that’ll weep
Because putting on a front is preserved to the weak
Hear the nerves through your speech; A sad sight to believe it’s..
Worse when you’re fake, and everybody can see it
Your deepest..regret, would be to replace it with anger
Stubbornness breeds guilt...the many faces of danger

http://www.storybytes.com/images/a-d...age-of-war.jpg

-Nique.

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=326631

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=326842

tough om...crazy ass lookin pic...good flow, good consistency, and very good creativity....i dunno...ya structure without a font change made the lettering look a little blunt becuz its just hard to read without a seperate font...other than that i liked it.

umm it was a mah verse ..........cuz you could've did alout of things better like ur structure ur verse didn't really look that good and you could've worded alout of lines better the title was good and you should of took advantage of title and did some creative shit ................no hate overall I give it a 6


hit up gone in dust plz

^ I can't say I agree with everything you said, but for what he did state there was deffinently more you could've done with this piece the structure as we all know really isn't that important only newbs worry about they structure that much it's all about how it flow and the wording, and this was a well organized piece with nice meta's and wordplay and a rather satisfing ending, the imagery was very vivid in this piece emotion came on strong, but for the likes of you ths was pretty basic and well okay, but I'll give it a 8.0/10, yo can you please leave feed on my links in my sig fam, it'll be well appreciated.

Thanks.

overall on this particular piece i think you did well. your vocabulary wasn't all that great but your wordplay really worked out for you. i think you worded your lines well. As far as the topic...at first i didn't like it, but i like how you kind of put a twist on the topic as well as a overall outline of this peice. nice job man. keep it up

rtf

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=326936

Please Return The Favor Leave Quality Feed On This Link.

Lol@ the structure. Riiise.

wut up twin yo you down to hit a text collab

Our hearts aren’t designed to cover, the lies
But yet we try to sustain disguised as others,
Our lives, our mind discovered..
Hoping our pride recovers, but the
Buried soul experiences the likes to suffer,
And it hides, eating inside, the slightest supper,
Then we’re unlikely to fight, so in spite, it’s tougher
You sigh and hover..

omfg...this exert was just ill as i heard it the flow was soo smooth and dope damn...
fuckin illness, i would definitly nominate it, the wording and emotion in it was felt like whoa... i mean we all have problems trying to identify ourselves... but the way you touched base on the subject was niice.. nothin else to really say. i really sighed and leaned to that and while i was reading i was like wtf... that pic symbolized the om altogether... if you ever get the chance check out some of my material and let me know what i can work on to get better.

This was really dope. The flow was nuts. The emotion was sick too. You're consistent. When I was in this forum about a year ago, you had the best piece I read. Now, here, again, you have the best piece I've read here so far. Nice job.

thx.

wow... nice Marshall Matthers flow... pretty polished piece... this makes me want to fuck your pen... if you know what I'm sizzin...