that shit up there was hard
i liked that shit
but since you aint leave a topic i'll leave one
n/t nasir jones
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that shit up there was hard
i liked that shit
but since you aint leave a topic i'll leave one
n/t nasir jones
I don't think you stayed on topic too well, and you didn't leave a topic for tha next MC...pay attention to detail cubscout....
Not leavin me a topic...thats fuckin funny junior
I guess thats why this clown calls himself...IllHumor
I split this clown down like logs being chopped in two
N' not wit an axe JayHull mauls on through
I'm doggin you playboy...so come back wit an ill verse
You a bitch...all you need is tha high-heels and a Coach purse
next topic: Kats not understanding cypher rules
i liked that
thats right murk them niggas who dont follow the rules
im tired of niggas not follwing the rules to the cypher
im thinking about heating they ass up like a lighter
i blow pipes like rowdy piper
they all blow dicks
wanna rap in these cypher but cant show shit
cuz when u cant follow rules yo flows really dont matter
its probally cuz they suck and stuck on the elevation ladder
everybody verses phatter, only cuz they follow rules
if you dont im a run in ya house and make you swallow tools (guns )
and make my hollows prove that you need to abide
cuz if ya dont i dont know how the hell you'll survive
n/t lil wayne
lol ..... wot up wid dat?
u forgot to leave a new topic!
it was alright though
could have had a better structure
next topic: Kats not understanding cypher rules
why cant u do what ur told,it's plain an' simple/
u mustn't be sober or have less brains thena pimple/
peeps like me are like regulators,upsettin the haters/
makin them go down well i elevate like ridin esculators/
follow the topics,to the rules were all kinda hostages/
i chop up beef rollin punks up like grindin sausages/
it aint hard to do,dawmn u foo how smart are u/
get outta this thread an' move to park on the moon/
topic=rippin the mic
niggas is retarted man..lol
the topic was lil wayne
n/t means next topic
Im rippin the mic.. got thick a thick bitch who knows how to lick...you know
Savin her click for later, cus of the shitty topic that is full of self glory hoe.
Pityful.. Ima set a better topic... got my glock clicked.. locked and loaded
Workin an merkin niggas, got doe, flow, hoes, and much more..................
.................................................. ....................Its all part of show biz
Got strifflin niggas like you not following the cyper rules... yea bitch listen ^^
Sayin ya "hard" an ready to go... we know... but its only ya horny dick bitch
Topic:Its battle time
your stuff was tight. the structure was fucked up though. no hate but the flow was a little off also. the topic was pretty decent and played a little but you handled it pretty well. keep droppin homie. and keep elevatin.
yo Its battle time, and lets see who hits-the-mic-right,
I scare his face down, like this battle shits-a-fright-night,
its official, the coin was tossed, so lets hit the trenches,
im on the defence, as I take notice to his wack offences,
strip the mic from his hands, and kick somethin for a bonus,
Ill make this rapper, change his name to a rapper formally known-as.
his head remains down, and its time for my last punch-line,
shit I served more dishes, to this rapper then at lunch-time,
so I just run-mine, shit so ill, it could make the sun-shine,
and no remorse for this maggot, cause im spittin magic,
its tragic, cause I fucked this cat so bad, he turned a faggot.
Next Topic: lost love ones.
Good.. Not much else to say
The lost loved ones are the hardest to loose.. An Ive really been thinkin
Should I take her or my boose....I know I cant choose to stop drinkin....
See Ive known her for a while, I show respect and I always care an love her
Its REAL love, kinda like the professer in the movie flubber, except not rubber
Her LIFE REVOLVES around me.. But now its her dull and stone grave site.....
I dont know why she had to go.. Ill always remember those days an nights...
Topic:Rough Streets
the content isn't that bad. i know what you are saying but the way you put it together needs revisin. Keep elevatin.
London, England, there was a bomb,
the rough streets whe shared when he was young.
school was hard, a racist devide,
the fights, racial murders were hard to survive,
no guns, just barenuckle,
blade to the heart,
no laughs or chuckle,
left near death if owt starts.
streets are rough and racist round these parts,
im tough, and chasin my health in the dark.
next topic: Rap-pop destroying true rap art.
.
yo this was aight you should elevate a lot though as thats the reason we're in here. but you did ya thang so i ain't hatin.
rap or pop
i'm the one on top
i'm never comin down
cause i'm high as the clouds
refusein to do what i'm told
you can't make me do shit i'm 18 years old
to old to take orders
north of the border
american bread an raised
rap-pop is my terriagn
so take it how you wanna disrepsect is intended
this the way i feel they is no pretendin
next subject=race in hip-hop
damn... shitty topic but here my feed back then spit..
Pittyful.. Elevate majorly.. Work on line structure, flow, and rhyme scheme..
The Race in hip hop is growing faster than nascar, blowin dale Jr. away
Faces gettin poped.. Rich rappers gettin fast cars almost every day
Not a good way to live... but it pays.. A few more hits an it'l b on its way
Hip hop is in the clubs, playin from 2 pac to Juelz... Hip hop is here to stay
Not much I could work on.. but anyways..
Topic= My hostile moment
You were on topic aiight wit it, could of had more strength and length to it, but nice wit it
My H0StiLe M0meNT
"EeRrrr' body get on tha fuckin floor before I start poppin!"...
(Security guards respondin dumbass chicks screamin why kids jaws droppin)...
"Yeah you too little kid don't make me spray ya moms up!"...
"Now every body put hands in tha air, I wanna see palms up!"...
(I pop one shot through tha hand of a elderly lady)...
"I told you mutha fuckaz I was serious, what you think you can play me?!"
"Wallets, purses, watches..rings...!"
"Oh yeah, thats right..take off everything!"
(Everyones possesions piled in tha middle of tha floor, now they sittin)...
(Bust two shots in tha ceilin)...
"I said everything whatchu' think I was kiddin!"
"Strip to ya butt naked mutha fuckaz, I wanna see ya birthday suits!"...
"Aiy0 you in tha back you cute, come here I think I like you..."
(Blonde babe in tha back approaches me with caution)...
(She's tellin me not to hurt her wit a whimpering tone thats soft)...
"Aiy0 watch this BITCH!!!!!"...
(Blow my own head off)...
my bad.....
TOPIC: poverTY
(wtf is up with brackets?)(other than then i liked it nice flow, but somtimes your lines werr to long or short work on structurs aswell...
.............Fuck i aint doing your topic im going to diss it,
.......this cat cant evin edit his post to add a new topic,
.......so he has to create a new reply, bitch thats freeposting,
with rhymes that crash and burn then turn on so you be roasting,
leave feedback for the cat abov you but you dont kno shit,
you aint got flow, or structure and wtf is up with the brackets.
wrighting more lines aint gunna make your feedback better kid,
coz you and your rhymes ride more dick than gay men ever did.
NT - Gay Cops Jus Pulled You Over And jus Took You Back To The cop station Jail Cell For "Punishment"
Aiy0 it was a Friday night n' I'm drivin down tha street wit Esculator...
We both fuckin blitz, eyes all lit red n' shit...
I see flashin lights behind me damn I knew we was busted...
Make a long convo short, that took Esculator and cuffed him...
Then they had me cuffed and put next to em' in tha cop car...
They found the four empty bottles and my weed in tha jar...
So we was gettin tha double wammy, DUI & DWI...
Fuckin jail time, I'de rather die...
So we hit to tha basement of tha station...
Mad dudes yellin, throwin shit n' hatin...
But my punishment wasn't as bad...
All I had to do was watch tha officers fuck Esculator from tha back...
So I laughed...and ate some donuts...
They pumped so much come in him I swear he was gonna blow up...
Overnight he was cryin n' shit if it was me I bet I would be to...
But I got off on possesion of marijuana..he got one to two...
topic: babysitting your little brother
good shit, funny at times. kinda got disturbed when yous was talkin bout pumpin come in yo hommie. but shits straight cause i laughed.
mommy daddy dont leave me sittin/
brother J gonna fill this house up wit bitches/
comin ova by the bakas dozen quick losin dey britches/
spilled cup a milk got that shit drippin in the floor/
baby brotha dont undastand when i spit in metaphors/
when the garage collapse, still didnt hear em bitches on my lap/
mommy, daddy, can anybody hear me/
brotha j in the coridor touchin that girls pussy/
take lil bro down now off to cradle/
back to the party be outta control like a psychotic dradle/
all of a sudden the room got slow/
thats about the time when the cops tapped the door/
"officer what seems to be the matter"/
behind my back the world starts to scatter/
frantic friends hittin switches hearin dishes shatter/
"son could you keep the noise down"/
the whole damn crowded citty can hear you now/
walkin thru my kitchen the shits all over the place/
walked to my brothers room, greeted me with middle fingers in my face/
haha that was wack but w/e
next topic- war
that shit was hot man 4real, it had a lot of imagination in it keep that shit up
it's war on this site
and im killing every enemy in sight
im deadly in the day but im viscious in the night
im lurking looking for other rappers to start murking
cuz my rhymes sting like bee's and start hurting
im in the trees sniping
niggas with these verses im typing
this is site war 1
and to yall its frightning
topic= Elevaion cypher
Quote:
Originally Posted by JHull Checkstatz
hey wheres my feedback^^^^^^^^
site, night, fight, tight, right, im pretty sure u can find more words then this typical one...
I take this plateau to a new elevation and drop bomb on ya altitude
against Da-one i'll mute this dude without much aggressive attitude
Look here son, ya rhyme is not nice nor does it look kute
Ur Dr. Seuss structure need more improvement like ya spellin It's misuse
I'll leave more scars on ya body than ice-pad on ya bruise
Ya flow aint smooth like a cup of cold tea u need to be re-brew
The only time u actully hot is being baking in the oven like bunch of Jews
I'm not even amuse, murkin this katz it's so simple they called it "Abuse"...
site, night, fight, tight, right, im pretty sure u can find more words then this typical one...
I take this plateau to a new elevation and drop bomb on ya altitude
against Da-one i'll mute this dude without much aggressive attitude
Look here son, ya rhyme is not nice nor does it look kute
Ur Dr. Seuss structure need more improvement like ya spellin It's misuse
I'll leave more scars on ya body than ice-pad on ya bruise
Ya flow aint smooth like a cup of cold tea u need to be re-brew
The only time u actully hot is being baking in the oven like bunch of Jews
I'm not even amuse, murkin this katz it's so simple they called it "Abuse"...
ALLIANCE
first off ya name means a group of people but ya only one person
....wait a minute im sorry maybe ya just a dumb person
tell me when your finish lacking knowledge
and i'll come back and murk u...ok i promise
anyways next topic is titties
da-one loves titties
i love to grab and rub titties
grip and palm and bear hug titties
alot of times i suck titties
to the flat chested chicks i say what titties
then she yells fuck titties
sometimes i kiss titties
stick out my tongue and lick titties
spot'em anywhere i never miss titties
knew the girl with tripple d's i use to call'er ms titties
she had some big titties
n/t valentines day
Your Structure Needs Worked On. PointLess To Rhyme With The Same Word In Every Bar. Speak The Truth In Your Lines. Everyone Knows You Dont Get Titties. Quit FreePosting.
This Special Day For Love or Loved One's, Rest Aside This Evening With Thee
Twenty Four Hours Of Perfect Harmony, Speaking The Heart Like Musical Sympthony's
Valntines is Not Perfect,It Could Cause Drama Between Couples,An Result In Break Ups
Or Awake The Soul Of Cupid As He Fires A Arrow 2 Beloved Ones,Then A Baby Turns Up
A Time To Share Gifts, An Feelings Apon Another, Verbally, Or Under The Covers
Familys Oppose To Births, Some Become A Father, As Many Become Mothers
Sheding Tears For Words,As Wel As Many Feelings Wondering What Their Heart Wil Say
This Beautiful Febuary 14 th, Oh What A Wonderfull Valentines Day
Next Topic: Critisism
shit was to gay, u was all serious and sounded like a girl/bitch
this little nigga trying to critsize me when he only sixteen
sorry little boy udont have to cry when i get mean
telling me i dont get titties cuz u only see'em on t.v
but they aint real so you throw on glasses made for 3d
little cupcake ass, in ya cypher ya sounded real gay
"This beutiful feb 14, oh what a wonderful day"
nigga dont say shit till yo little ass hit puberty
yo ass might not see titties better spell nudity
Thats Why It's A Topical.Quote:
Originally Posted by da-one
Noob.
* Alias *
it's little niggas like this who better stay in they places
how can i say this..fuck it im wack rapper racist
disrespect ya niggas and slap ya faces
jump back to basics
better cool down cuz i pack the gauges
i've been forces to put niggas in coma's
leav'em for dead and you can smell the aroma
u from baltimore
i'll ryde there spot yo moms and off the whore
this will never be a tie game, u cant even the score
i let my bullets enter ya back and come out ya front
u been perpetrating ya whole life baby come out ya front
before i come out with pumps
and have yo little cross dressing ass come out them pumps
ya figment of speak only reflect ya illiteracy
I can see thru ya brain fragment u juz a wannabe
rap u aint got it so u try'a steal my free
i pop u like i pop a tart and charge u a fee
ya punch line doesnt come full itz not complete
Da-one juz face it ya weak take critic like text in need
U cant succeed if ya punch line doesnt connect like beads..
ok. that was a pretty tight verse apart from the last 2-3 lines because it lost all its structure. Oh, nb u left no topic so im a choose 1 myself
ok. that was a pretty tight verse apart from the last 2-3 lines because it lost all its structure. Oh, u left no topic so im a choose 1 myself
Topic: acceptin people
Look why we gotta walk around screw facin eachother
Just take me for me n accept me like a brother
not a brother of faith, religion or family
but a brother of life livin in this insanity
the worlds gradually startin to accept variety
but people wanna make their way priority
the priory is full almost at its full capacity
drugs r like a cavity in life but fuck it pass it me
coz, things aint changin n they neva ever will
while people think the best option for peace is 2 kill
next topic: state school conditions
yo you did good with the structure but do to the fact that you picked the topic made your drop less exciting but you should work on your multis and complexity a little bit
and somme lines didn't rhyme clearly so you should try and elevate on that
This dude V.I.P. never get the job done he's actually M.I.A.
inactive since the rennisance.........thats why your semi gay
your played streched bars never comply in a battle verse
topicals are even weak sadthing your poetry talent's worse
you'll need glasses when you come from point of views as such
Nobody ever wants you thats why your not in dope crews as much
multis need work use your head without giving blow jobs
if you worked on cars is the only way you'd know mods
look as you get punched and frisked but I still never felt ya
I suggest you go to extreme elevation not even they could help ya
topic:drive by shooting
........
.....................
........................... need work like the rest of us..
Ya 14 drive by and shot the wrong house
u a lost child with milk still drippin from ya mouth
tell ya mom itz breast feedin time cuz ya wild'n out
foul with ya style juz sit in the corner ya time-out
Ya talk of gunz prove u actin thug with doubt
how u gonna be a gansta when u only pout...
topic:shadow box
man fuck that man can somebody else drop what they think about my verse just skip everything that he dropped man its all gay please stop Alliance you need real work
ill go with glich's drive by shooting topic
aight glichs wos cool, nice compound sylable rhymes, i liked it alot, M.I.A., semi-gay well gud. my turn
aight fuck drive by shootings, shooters and murderaz/
ill drive by u, pop u and prove that uve heard-ov-us/
we murderous and sure-to-buss and u sound absurd-to-us/
your drive by, my words-i-cuss, i fly by, im dangerous/
i need major-trust in my click, trouble they paging-us/
waging-wars on slaving boys, calm down u made-ya-noise/
yo heres the wager-boys, infinite ammo 2 stop drive by shooting/
and if u agree then evry1 holla yo cee u-king/
sorry next topic: censorship
nigga u suck cock wit da dflock
wtf man drop somethin dumbass lol
N/T
Unrepresentative
My life is but a dream, I have yet to awake
Glistening stream, untrue, wars at stake
The news, showing pictures of destruction
Child abduction, Fuck cancer, moneys in liposuction
Damn, unrepresentative democracy, cartoons are drawn
Truth is but unerving, black clouds, grey storms
So tell me, should i open my eyes, to see the truth
Bang!...Man Slain, dead in the phonebooth.....
yo is there another topic?
Yeah N/t: Insane and coked