First Contact

your flow was flawless...
your multis was good...
your vocab was good...
your focus was on-point...
your creativeness was nice yet simple...
^^ meaning it was good because of the vocab and concept but simple because the concept was about your love one which is not hard to do but the way you did it is hard to mimic i hope you understand and is not confused...

fav lines:
She was my everything...

When our eye’s first met and locked into focus
I saw a beauty unmatched, yet often unnoticed
My first word’s burned as I burst and an emoted
An invocation of interest, while the infinite prose’s
To be written then exposed with, a heart full of gold
And a tongue full of slogans, of the lock on my soul
From your hot little pose and the voice you compose with
Had me caught in the moment, robbed of my breath
Lost in the current’s and motions of an emotional ocean
Invoked and emboldened, confidence open exposed with
The way I was walking and controlling those moments
I was selling myself, now I’m buying you roses
Those shoes you admired and diamonds imposed in
Platinum bands with white gold in the bracelets
Proud of our devoted flirtation’s despite being devoted
And mated, we remain with focus and patience
-Love under pressure, held up in the waves
When through thick and then thin
Didn’t get between us, it just thickened our skins
So if you’re listening in, this is unprecedented dedication
-Together to death,
and when you rest, I’ll reminisce and embrace it
-Bringing flowers to your grave,
with tears on my face till my day’s end
always remebering,


she was more then a friend.....

lmfao i could not just pick a line i thought the whole shit was good man and very well enjoyed...

9/10 ( the highest i ever rated any open mic so far )

RTF please i have 2 open mics...

Yoo shit was beautiful, poetry was crazy and type intense for that short read, I liked it a lot

"when our eyes first met and locked into focus,
I saw a beauty unmatched, yet often unnoticed,
My first words burned as I burst and emoted,
An invocation of interest, while the infinite proses"

Those first bars are my fav, great shit keep them coming

thank yal..

This was a pretty touching piece man.. On the poetic side.. I had the feeling of melonchaly from the start for some reason.. Everything was fluent and flowed pretty well. Detailing in the jewlery and in all was exceptional..

Those shoes you admired and diamonds imposed in
Platinum bands with white gold in the bracelets
Proud of our devoted flirtation’s despite being devoted
And mated, we remain with focus and patience

^ this was my fav. good couple bars.

appreciate it fam.

okkkk

risennn

uped

never read any shit from you before.
i felt the way you got deep with feelings,
and i found it easy to flow through,
all together nice drop bro.
-Re Create

thanks..

"I was selling myself, now I’m buying you roses"

You had some profound lines,but maybe metaphors would've added some deeper depth?The flow was smooth all through and the story was consistent.Really nice stuff.Keep writing :)

PS: Check my drop "Wearing Yesterday"

thanks, more feed?