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the 8 lines left me saying "ok..." but this really picked up and became an extremely powerful peace in the end.
I give this piece a 9.5*.
This is the first OM I've read of yours, and I enjoyed it very much. Keep up the goodness.
*- Rated using the SOT2005 Rating Sytem using Microsoft Excel Spreadsheets. To obtain a spreadsheet rating generator please contact steveontrial via America Online Instant Messanger.
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i like the first bit best 8/10 for the rest though
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the flo was good and the structure
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Dope shit Born. The emotional imagery was very descriptive. Multis on point. At one point it got confusing as to which kid died, etc... but it was still hot. Storyline quite obviously the strongest point. You also came out of your usual box in which you write, which is good. A name change might be in order though. It's very wordy, this is a more representation-entitled piece to me. But dope anyway.
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Dope got damn piece...
I mean your discription of this story was amazing.
Your rhyme scheme flawless, freaking smooth rhetorical.
Your word usage discribed each scene greatly.
Got damn this was dope. Not much that I can
say . It was consistant throughout.
Great Job.