-God has a Gun-

i PPRECIATE IT..THNKS...UP.

thats was a pretty cool piece.. you could see you put some thought into it.. but the multi's sorta seemed force in this.. but flow was good.. structure was good.. but i wonder how the verse would look if you put it at regular size.. iono.. i jst hate it wen peeps put the font size hella small because their bars are too long.. but yeah.. nice drop

yo that shit wuz hot dawg.keep dropin them like this one.stay up homie

well the Multis werent forced luckily for me...and the bars were as ong as i wanted them...puttin your piece in a small font makes it looked more organized and well...it just looks better.....but it would be cool if the multis were forced...then youd be right...just cause you didnt understand some of the words and what not doesnt mean the multis were forced...all in all keep trying to reply correctly..j/p....thnks...up.

I guess it was pretty good..could use more advanced rhymes though and maybe a pinch more of vocabulary,but overall,i liked it.
You had multies in there..
Just throuw in alittle more rhymes,more complex...like instead of death/best..something like Development/angelian/eloquent.

yea

wat the hell was that a poet this is rap not poetry

well another idiot in RB...this isnt poetry fucktard..go to poetic scriptures..youll find your poetry there..fuckin idiot

man that shit was fuckin nuts i could read that shit a hundred times and think it was as good as the first time i read it thats fuckin tight man sickest shit ive ever seen on this site

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by :TreaZoN:

Some say in a metaphoric phrase,God's got a Gun
and hes aimin for tha sun,praise and amen,men gotta run
hide theyselves when they shelves begin to shake
mountains shift,tha oceans lift as tha moon begins to break
scaled eight earthquake,seems its the apocalypse
god has just been droppin tips,and so what if a comet hits
hes on goldenstreets with a cannon,just to examine
how tha sins of man can escape gods plannin,hes demandin
to know what evil has beseached his people,too lethal
to ingest by men but decietful,women in crumbled steeples
sins more serious than mens,offend what thee defends
force depends on trends of troops,its God they will commend
who needs it more,bring death to what you cant perfect
tha dialect suggests,if were less than best,our deaths progress
when your made in an image never seen,whats tha vintage
how perfect can we be,from an image we cant see,so were a percentage

---

that was some real shit...........keep droppin.......

Brilliant! see yall this is what we need on front lines.................Werdplay and Vocab

thanks..i appreciate it...up.

wow i really liked this. not really much feedback i can give cuz it was perfect. the vocab was dope and it was just really tite

thnks

that shit is just hot. straight off tha stove.
somthin from deep inside man its real.
really nice, liked it alot... keep it up yo..