A Disciple's Thread

your 1st verse:
that nas track is sick - nice find girlie xoxo
dope line: Like when they light a cookie doll or candle and you feel the burn
good quote: “You’ve been in it so long it’s gonna look like Magic”
i love the fact its called palace day :x
to own the princess for the king very feminine really dug it
I don’t wanna be Cinderella - i feel like that so often
i did heroin once it was in an mdma tablet i ended with a virgin hostess on my lap in her dads car

your 2nd verse:
the intro to the track dope
love the arrest part
brilliant hook - the step lyrics in the beat was dope and nice jon drop and the news paper love it daddy relation dope as a king relation if your following your stories child drop to "you never going to make it where you are going" that was just the track lol

i love that you chose to open with your birth..
ahh the dr was who spanked you i love it cause dr's are called angels in australia they are certain type of ones and they have it printed on the side of their ambulance so dope work there
love the save the day quote
really feel the poor old soul part
the description in this is dope
the devil being there in the hospital and the angel that spanked you dope really alot of emotion and description f your mind state loves it
freaks who swore I was Jesus - lol i met this dude in hospital that was in there because he thought he was the devil
i love that self sacrafice isnt in your heart
i think its like that to its one of the thing where its not an always thing but as a sometimes thing its nice because everyone gets over crowded "I need divine intervention and I believe god works thru people and angels…"

your 3rd verse:
i was recommended that track before this battle
i love that you did a count down structure for it dope
pop it was like a gun shot when you dropped your number equation really showed some vodooess type stuff
good shit
I can tell if I would sleep w someone or not in the first 10 minutes eye to eye? im like that and i already know if there inteligent or not
And like my vv i love your vv
I’m sure I will be having sex again soon and it will be even more amazing than ever!!!! - i dont want sex any more i devoute a life of celabcy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoXyVYHoEPU

new orleans always seemed dope to me im a big bodycoubt fan and they def rocked that entire album

@Candy cellabcy yeah right…. This prick been droubting me since he had me gang raped in myrtle beach… my daddy told me that

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He drank himself to death and I really am going to kill who ever did that to him

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Like I’m so nice when I’m happy and baking cookies and shit but don’t piss me off… especially if you a sex offender

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I was ok… but now I’m having a bad day again… I’m just gonna finish this nip and hope I pass out. I only
Drink when I’m broke and I am so mother fucking tired and them making me sick and forcing me to live broke

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I’m gonna go try to find a part time but as long as they keep forcing me to share my body with them and kiss my hands I’ll never get better again

yeh nobody touches my veve

I need a fucking bump… but to do so I have to steal my own atm card and hear it and get no help ever again… stealing my own money?!?? Wtf is that?!?? I swear someone try to control me or my money again and I’m a stab them in the throat with an ice pick

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It’s my moms husband so I can’t so I’ll just wait until he falls asleep and try to find my dads atm card

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@Candy omg what up… what you doing?

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Like wolves? We just different… they’re everything I was raised to be against and this maggot just don’t get it

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Like go find a bitch that can even fuck you cause I can’t

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I CANT STAND CONTROL FREAKS

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Or men acting like desperate females who got to control and manipulate every situation to their favor…

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You really want it up the ass old man and I don’t have a dick… I suggest you go find one

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I mean can you even get it up? Or is that why I’ve been abused to the point I can barely have sex either

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Nah for real… I’m a kill him and go to jail easy for it if he don’t leave me alone

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I’m going to go to sleep… these days are so hard I can hardly even get dressed or get dressed for bed… to be honest I’m so sick I’ll probably go to sleep in my jeans tonight. My mom comes home for 2 weeks tomorrow THANK GOD!!!!

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I was fine… I was working… started to exercise again… standing back up… then here these bitches go and I’m kissing my hands again, being abused, kept up in pain all night

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Then I have to let go again

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And here I am kicked into fetal FOR WHO AND FOR WHAT?!??!?

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This faggot talking about the fight of my life like it’s a good thing… like why can’t you comprehend… why don’t you get it? This not some fight of my life it’s 8 more years of steady torture because I refuse to let go of my own family and creed. Like nothing about fighting is good… but to you it is. And like… YOU ARE EVERYTHING IVE BEEN RAISED TO BE AGAINST. Do you even comprehend the level so low I see you as? Desperate and pathetic and bitch like too?!??!

im just listening to

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMk8wuw7nek
it reminds me of in time the movie cinema and loved it

You really want it up the ass :)

I’ve been counting… the last 5 conversations and probably everyone I ever had wy step dad starts with money… yo I can’t stand that shit either but that’s my moms husband… someone like that would NEVER be mine though

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@Candy HELL NO I DONT WANT THAT SHIT UP MY ASS… one person and never again… it hurts… it’s gross… I even got sick to my stomach. It’s funny cause I always saved it for when I found my husband so he could have something no one else ever had but I’m gateful I’ll never marry somebody who like anal and I’ll never do it again

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@Candy cutest post ever… that was shadow… I have a shadow baby and when I get so mad I need to think of her

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Now I’m about to cry @Candy

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My ex just called me cause I texted him I hate you letter by letter… I’m so fucking confused

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The only time I can cry is when I drink

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It’s why I pray for death and not afraid to die cause I have 2 more shadows over there too and my dad now and like ��

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Fight of my life? Fuck you it’s bull shit and not even worth it!!! I was fine… minding my own business and even saw my pyre and then this… like why they even have the rite. I know now how they knew

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I just always discredited him and don’t want to miss again if that’s what’s up but I doubt it

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If being with him hurts someone else it can’t be right

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But I still love him still and that’s when it hurts

atleast your still in connection just take care of each other

@Candy I do he knows I have his back and vice versa… I’m just fucked up cause when I was on my I want a baby he was like let’s go and I was like no… back then he sold drugs and being mentally unstable I couldn’t risk the primary or strongest parent in jail. He went straight after getting busted and serving 3 years and like it’s where I fucked up. He is a GREAT father and a STAND UP not some bum mother effer man. And he knows me… he’s said a lot about me that he noticed that I didn’t even realize he was paying attention like how I usually only get grouchy when I’m tired and stuff like that… and I love him but I just don’t think he’s capable of the relationship I need - like how we were before… that’s why I say I don’t want to discredit or dismiss him and make a mistake again! But he’s way more sexually advanced than me with 3 somes and stuff and I’m just not into or capable of that… Another chicks VV is gross to me and stuff like that…

respect well it is what it is
i love your pic
is that you or your two girls

@Candy that’s me and I don’t have 2 girls… I might’ve had one girl when I was 13 right before my 14th bday but if I had twins I think the other one was a boy because I remember my friend taking mookie to an aa meeting and when he saw me he jumped in my arms and squeezed my cheeks so hard I had a scar a couple of years from his finger nail… but like being crazy I have to accept if you have children you would know this… except I was in mental at the time and them drs do what ever the f they want!!!!!! I remember hypnotism… and it’s illegal now so I can’t fix it and know that that isn’t what is getting me hit.

well my first thought was that is a very pretty girl and it was you soo there was lots of love

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em-Qideg4qg

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i am just listening to this

i remember when it first came out i was a ruff ryders fan n jada and bubba just made a new track n it was dope that wwiii

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Trd49Da0gf0

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who do you think would win i got the easter bunny

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WA4tLCGcTG4

@Candy they both were hysterical and hard to chose but Kahn I think… who do you think?

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@Candy 2 live crew oh snap… like when I woke up I also realized how I knew all the words to “Dirty Nusery Rhymes” and my dad had a pic of me driving the boat with a Chicago Bulls hat on too… and then I remembered my brother getting cursed the fuck out for thongs on the boat… and that’s when I went huh?

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@Candy yeah I’ve heard that bubba song before too… he’s good! But as far as commercial, underground and trap I was raised on DJ Clue mix tapes so I tend to like the hard core and one of my exes would laugh and I told him it’s probably cause I come from heavy metal ties. I love the song but it’s a little too commercial for me.

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https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xBGPNNMztqk I was just listening to Mobb Deep… and laughing at head burn off day and flying and speeding and etc… things that really embarrassed me that I came to terms with. And I LOVE Guns N’ Roses but I heard this one line that makes me question “Now you don’t walk so proud” and that’s mad fucked up to me cause I been bitched liked that before too. And like what’s wrong with walking proud? Everyone should…

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One time I tried to be cute in front of another one of my exes friends to make a good impression not flirting and I tripped going up the stairs type ishh… I just smh… I hate that I walk with my head down now

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I don’t want anybody to make it up to me… I don’t need anybody to make it up to me… they just need to respect my decision and my old friends are GONE with a never to return even if you need help in the worst way. I have absolutely zero love and heart left for them and my niece is more than capable of handling that flying ish that I still don’t really understand what that’s about.

yeh iwas bumpen mob deep album for a bit they brought round about time that gunit i think signed em i was rocking that one

It’s like some perpetual circle of hell that I can’t seem to break out of but I know when I start kissing my hands and shit I’m going down QUICK… and SICK again!

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I thought Em signed G unit? @Candy

I thought I had this one posted… from a sacred scriptures battle

Gone Girl

I was 25 when they said schizophrenia it was an immaculate blow
It was mass hysteria as the tears busted out my eyes and just flowed
Sometimes when Im alone in my car driving, I just cry
I was never prepared for the inside out just watching my brain die
I’m still in here… it’s me I’m still me
Talking myself through all the illusions of insanity
Diagnosis came firm on bipolar 1 and PTSD
There is no cure for the disease that kills you socially
You know when you get drunk, black out, and wake up to hear all the stupid shit you done?
It’s pretty much the same thing, only I ain’t even do irresponsible shit to cause it – so I just run
Run girl… so fast and so free… runaway or running… from the sickness inside you can’t see
I did everything the drs told me to do… but I still get sick
Sober 8 years and finally said fuck you, you psych prick
I’m faded… it’s easier faded so bitch fuck a 1 I’m on 2
Because sometimes angels are all I see when psych has me tied to the bed too
It is especially hard to be tied down since my assault
But I guess it’s easier for the drs to manage the ward then they act like it’s our own fault
Most times its to my quiet secret place I soar to just get some rest
And I think back to 16 when I was his vest…
I was covering him would it have been best if I had gone then
Cause all this shit that takes place after I can’t deal even back to way back when
Cause ever since, I’ve always been on the outside looking in
The meds… you wanna talk about the meds, the weight, and the fog
Cause I actually get better advice listening to DMX when he talking about the snake, rat and the dog
It’s liberating once you learn to not give a fuck about what anyone think or says
But it’s all so superficial like sweating these 50lbs I gained from the meds
If I had Alzheimer’s would they laugh less, cause it’s progressive
I can’t remember shit without a list now and some things I become so obsessive (like writing)
My biggest fear is what happens when my mind is gone, they can’t bring me back, and my body is still here
I know Jesus know… you know sometimes I am just sitting and I feel a presence and out my eye I drop one tear
I’m just trying to make it all clear and I can paint that other world with words - and you know even sometimes it makes sense?
Then I remind myself you just gone girl… don’t get caught up in the pretense

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My mom told me to write a book and help other people with mental illness… I’m gonna try and I’m a call it WELCOME TO HELL

yeh dre

@Candy do you ever get into a zone where you don’t feel like yourself and you don’t hear like yourself? If so, how do you break it?!?

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I know…. But I be bored a lot

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I have like $20 until NEXT Monday type sucks and like… it’s a living hell beyond comprehension since I woke up and if one part gets better 3 more get worse

yeh all the time my fiance had boarderline dissorder so she had no feeling but in anal sex it was too deep so even people with 0 feeling can have feeling still

I don’t like their religion and I don’t like their culture… why am I forced in it against my choice and will?

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Yo gay men aren’t wooses I only did it with one person cause they caught me drunk and blacked out but the pain alone woke me up and the horrible noises I was making was weird as hell too… I can’t stand the ish I’ll never do it again!

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Like will I ever find a man that hates it too?!? Cause HELL NO and if you can’t provide they will get provided for and I’m not with that cheating shit either if you committed… at least if things are going good.

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@Candy I started venting again… didn’t realize you were still talking but I asked you some questions I’m interested in hearing your opinion… cause I need HELP or more like advice cause I just feel like it’s a zone you can relate to…

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I didn’t jump back in though!!!!! I did when they came no not here either and now that I’m awake and understand a lot more - love or a relationship is HARDLY my priority. Especially with people I KNOW I DONT LOVE AND NEVER WILL!!!!

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Everyone wanna jump on the July 4th band wagon and if he, they come from you?!?? No thank you homie… I can find my own man! You can pay me though… like is that’s what’s up? Mother fuckers think they gonna get paid?!??

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Cesar’s war? I heard he made his soliders have sex with each other so like I’m a female and they male… and I’m not against bisexual shit I just don’t and won’t do it. Like it’s rare but Herero does exist and it actually puts me at a disadvantage!

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And why is it taking like all of me not to smoke weed right now… I don’t even smoke weed like that!!!!!! Like… it feels like my entire self and balance is just off and I can’t stand it!!!!

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Good game… that’s what all this and the past 30 years was? Like I’m not even nosy and everyone all in MY business behind my back at that as well? Not even reporting accurately if somehow I’m the one fucked and like…

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Like A and B is right there and C writing is over here… and like why don’t people just ask if they’re confused for real.

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Like how you just going to attach yourself to somebody that isn’t even your creed or religion to even begin with? Then they going to try to tell me it is? You can’t pick my god for me either and it’s obvious we don’t have the same one so like…

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Who had some low life low moral sociopathic bitch waking me up to even begin with?!?????? Let me find out it happened again and that’s the past 8 years of straight hell and abuse I’ve been in!!!!

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I got to go… I want weed and these days I refuse to squirm or feel uncomfortable over matters that petty…

yeh il def answer anything you have just shoot away

Cause you can’t put a bitch on a mattress and read her especially with a different heart! Retarded? What’s retarded about? My cousin has cebrel palsy (sp?) and kids at school put his head in the toilet. I was so mad I told god give one to me and nobody will ever fuck with them and I’d make sure they’d have the best life ever! Not that I would want a child that’s sick but if one’s here I got them too!

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I’ve been talking to god about my babies since I was in 5th grade and I never got one! I’m not mad I respect if for a reason but like… to be totally derailed off your life path for so long that you miss your dreams like… you just find new ones!

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@Candy do you ever get into a zone where you don’t feel like yourself and you don’t hear like yourself? If so, how do you break it?!?

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Lucky as hell I found weed…

listen to children in their sleep

@Candy you just reminded me of the weirdest shit. I lived with my ex and he had his daughter and her cousin sleep over - he had to run out so I was writing on my cpu and then one started crying in her sleep and like 2 minutes later the other one did too. Not like they were hurt or scared crying but weeping. I didn't know if I should wake them up or not but decided not to. Now the bugged out shit about that is one of the kids mom was murdered like a year or two later and I always wondered if like someone was telling them and that's why they were crying like that. The mom was cool as hell, I liked her a lot... she was an AMAZING mother and I'm just still so shocked that she's gone. She was WAY too young too.

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I'm upset I never got to be a mom but I was close with my sisters kids so that helped..

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I used to wake up early before work, like 4am or 5am in the morning, so I can write. Work, school, gym, boyfriend, therapy and psych... there was never enough hours in the day. Now all I have is time to fill... the only good thing about that is I don't have to worry about having to stop writing or etc for the next activity and I don't have to ask my friend or bf for 10 minutes so I can listen to a song or etc. I never had time to think cause when I did I used to get sick. Now all I do is think... I get it now... I think. Just sitting here like I can write and not have to worry about time constrictions. I can write all day if I want to. But I really miss work... I really miss having money too. My mom thinks I should write a book about psych and connect a bridge and maybe people like me can get cured too. I guess maybe I will work on that today.

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@Candy what you doing today? How do you fill your time?

i think writing a book is a good idea
im glad you worked out all it was was thinking xoxo

im good today i just woke its 6:44am here im bout to get a coffee, i got a smoke already hehe

i usually these days cause im a retiered hip hop artist is just watch movies i either buy some from op shops and stuff or just watch em free on the internet.. i listen to music to - i got lots of books to read one day when i get sick of the movies and music..

what do you do to fill time

i have like three showers a day to because its my favourite thing to do in the world then some nights i go into the spa

@Candy nice but why retire? I’ve heard your stuff you good!! Make more money but for real my dream is to ghost write so I like that you write with me and can maybe help me get better so I can. I can’t imagine waking up so early anymore… most nights that’s when I’m finally falling asleep. It takes 6-10 hours just to fall asleep (when the pins and stuff stop) but the crazy part is if I can get to my focal point… I start drooling and am out in 5 minutes!

Its 8:44pm and I’m about to get myself a coffee too…

Reading a book is a good idea since I want to learn how to write one… I don’t like to read that much and if I do I have to read in short increments or a chapter at a time cause I keep reading the words but my mind wanders. Like when I listen to music I repeat the song a lot to catch all the words.

I be bored as hell… I don’t work cause my bp1 and ptsd are still too much on me physically too. If I can manage my sleep and the physical attacks I probably could get back to work again.

You feel like writing again? What’s the next topic?

call us today - topic

i wanted to retire cause there was no work for a dude thirty years old - and i had lots of jobs something like 30 so it was def time i still had options but i would rather cash in on insurance otherwise i might not have had any other time to cash in on it it is just what i hear..

i use to ghost write for tech and shit its cool good medal to have

yeh i def feel like writing again

@Candy ok I’m gonna do my tarot right quick and start to write. And I can totally relate… I cashed in my 401k and pension to move back home and ran thru it in 2 months. I don’t regret it. I had MAD FUN!!!! And was in a way paying back a debt too…

thats what your suppose to do aite set up the match and il wrap up something

Thank you <3

your welcome

Like @Candy I just felt my heart so I blew a kiss and they just got mad… I feel like some dissected and put back together bitch and it’s making me feel like I lost my own god cause I really didn’t do anything wrong and was being abused and dragged thru depths so low you couldn’t even begin with imagine…

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Begin to imagine* … I’m tired of being the one sick when they try to throw me to him to him to him or to him or insisting on being part of my wake up and like… I am SO serious I want them gone. They are literally trying to change and demand to be my god and spirituality and I can’t deal with it!!!! I’m tired of getting my ass kicked with zero defense it feels like. WHY? And I’m just going to vent until someone understands what’s going on too cause it’s more than just mental illness… my quality of life is SO POOR right now and it’s like they keep me trapped and god let’s them and around and around we go. Someone who was talking directly to my soul and cool cool cool what ever I didn’t do it but why am I the one down? And why do they refuse to go away?

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Pac… the vulture is Kevin and they SEE WITH THEIR OWN EYES how sick and mental he can make me… so why I still feel haunted? And the spirits running thru me - it’s not all souls - what they even doing here disrespecting me too

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If their entire division goes away and stays away from me I feel I can get better and get some type of life back… I refuse to live sick and confused for anybody

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I don’t want and never asked for a god this close to my body

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Especially one that disrespects me and my flesh

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Do you know how long 8 years is? WHO IS MAD AT ME?!? And I’m pissed cause I didn’t even sign up for this shit and can’t even get peace and comfort in my own body now too?

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Heart… there has to be a win win for both of us cause I’m not going to sit here and live like some abused punk bitch for and by people like them

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And I’m not going to be forced to be with ANYBODY especially people that I’m not even attracted to… like how can they even think I would be. I’ll be by myself then… bored, sick, and miserable

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Just felt the stab to my ribs and you disrespecting my Jesus for real

Nah blowing a kiss made you mad WHY? … fuck you then I don’t need you either. It’s not like you help or protect me or get them off of f and away from me any way. And now I have to try to sleep more confused then ever?!??

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Can you at least make them stop pinning my eyes and abusing my body when I reach for my family… it’s not my god and I’m trying to figure out why 1 is confused… I’m not living like this for NO ONE

blowing a kiss is ok

I’m not psychic and I’m not good at assumptions… somebody figure it out since nobody will tell me a thing and I’m not going to sit here another 8 years getting tortured, stalked, and disrespected in my own body!!!!

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Fuck blowing a kiss he can go to hell too…

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He can go to hell too… it’s not like he helps or protects me either. Who want a bitch that just sit there and watch and cry any way

respect

@Candy sorry I was going off and it's not that I'm new to this ish... the pins, tugs, or water splashes... it's just that about 8 years ago it became abusive and I'm not with all that...

So like on that sick they implanted... I felt my heart down there, while they were saying my enemy who I thought abused me up there, then saying to me see you like it!!!! That's when I took the knife to my wrist and then they told me to go to the people that were doing it for help... NOPE!!!! Like how does that type of split happen any way? And like
@Candy are you familiar with alternative practices cause really I'm not and am kinda clueless how to secure myself and my body type.

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The sexual abuse when the TV said crazy like 40 times? I felt tied down and was having sex with my bf and couldn't move or push him off me when they were saying sister, cousin, brother, mother, etc... Last time I had sex they was still on that but I know not just don't know how to just phase them out. Like specifically I don't wanna be psychic - I don't want any random abusive stranger to be able to connect to me like that or talk to me like that. Or stalk me like that, or abuse me like that... like I have a family circle I love that would never hurt me - I don't know if they know or if they know how I protect myself from magic and split shit when I'm not even a witch to begin with and don't want to be. Ain't no way in hell am I going to side with the people who were closest to me and did it all to me to begin with. They call themselves masters of manipulation and now I see why. That's not something to be proud of dumb ass bitches.

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But tap, hit to the throat, head ache, kiss hands... like Oh my mother fucking god can we just get to real for a second!!!!! I'm never going to trust some stranger on my body unless I know who it is and like...

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I trusted my God and I felt so betrayed I wasn't protected... so I took prior advice from like 15-20 years ago and read the Quran. Which actually helped me to understand my own religion too... and I made promises I will keep to My God I just don't understand why there is one on me that is so abusive for real and won't take NO for answer.

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it feels like when they jump to you it puts you in hell or trouble for and with them... I don't want to feel like anybody but myself though... with a select few that I can tolerate and trust.

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I don't know how else to explain it and for real have nothing to hide either... and like... some low level "pawns" aren't going to hold me up and drag me thru the sludge for them either. And I don't value anyones life as a pawn until they devalued it as so by doing some dumb coward ass shit like this. Nobody likes me... I laugh at that song... do I care? Depends on who and it's like all the secrets and rumors or what I did and didn't do... like nah someone HAS TO BE LYING on me cause I ain't do shit to begin with. And like... I used to have friends and it seem like every time someone get mad at me they so mad they won't even tell me why... that's disrespect in itself too and like... I see now the strange shit that's been going on for years - just when did I get considered to be just some punk?

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I need to be ME in MY environment and zone going thru this so I can handle it... I'm just trying to figure out how ME all the sudden ends up in some circle that isn't even and never was mine. Keep that shit bitch... solve your own issues hoe

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I want the best case scenario for me, my family, and the ones involved that I still respect. But nah I'm not going to sit here and feel like some shit on my shoulders that I did wrong when it really has nothing to do with me and something I'm dead against too.

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Like me and Rio were getting cool, he was inside my HOME before... I get out the hospital to call him he on some fuck you bitch and for weeks maybe even a month later I tried calling to ask what the fuck he even mad at me for to begin with. I DID NOTHING TO HIM... but seriously - it happens all the time and for years. Maybe if people would just spit the shit out and speak we can solve it.

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Rule number 1, if you have to keep it a secret you probably shouldn't be doing it. Rule number 2, don't do anything you can't admit to (my sister knows my rules and cracks up and forbids me from seeing Fight Club)

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I'm dealing with too much already on this mental ill shit... I don't need the extra for real and like it's been cruel and abusive to the extreme and like I bet they don't even have a valid reason to do so or treat me like that.

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The tractor next to me on the beach when I came to but I remember getting up to get out its way the night before and like... Dp you comprehend what the next 6 months were like? And my drs with my drug test straight black from the blood or the positive DBT9 which is hardly a recreational drug and like... it's a law that they have to report stuff like that to the police. Maybe if they did or help me handle what happened to me I would've saved myself MAD embarrassment screaming it everywhere. I was the last one to know or remember. WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON FOR REAL? I can't begin to tell you how many laws were broken or the questions it leaves me with as well.

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And some how someone managed to make it all legal too... I'm done going off. I actually had a good day i ruin it all by myself sometimes... trying to quit smoking weed that I started smoking again and changed my mind. I"m not going to sabotage myself cause disability keeps denying me. BUt hey... if you gonna get accused any way.

Made Men

https://youtu.be/FPdMxixB_kk

“You either gonna be a coward or king”
I didn’t have many options - I can’t sing
Or to bring to life nothing without my left wing
Wish me luck…
Hop in the truck hit 120 to buck and defuse
Water splashes my face cause this is a heart that refuse
Now who gonna use what or who like some muse
You fucked with the wrong bitch… you chose the wrong bitch to abuse
1, 2, 3… Bloody Mary was under in Hail
Now I’m stuck posing like I’m under some spell
Transitioned to coke from weed… less smell but these days it’s all a dog need
And who I feed? No one… not one… but held to many men when holding a gun
What up gangsta? What up dun?
Is it a March to widow - doubt that
But you gonna need more than a little
Cause all I need is 10 seconds to douse back
Take your allowance and say she crack
I mean what kind of ish is that
And nah I can’t swear I got their back
Cause where were they when I got attacked
In fact… I’m a leave you with this though
A snitch made me thorough, a bitch hit my borough,
a rat got me shot, now I’m sitting here just forming a plot
“Made men on some dead president shit”
I really like money… more than a lot 🐸🍭

Ok so like when I break down this logically the video camera and cameras I assume be you… so nah I would never go against or press charges but “they can’t say shit you got it all on tape” … so what’s the problem?

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You know my social and birth certificate missing right? That means someone was in my home again and the only one that care about that is me… I told you how someone went to the bathroom and left when we were in New York so like…

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I used to love that song.. “all over a hoe” on the menace to society soundtrack… can’t wait to find out what’s going on and write my own…

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Cause your cover look like I felt that day… running barefoot and all… was that a car that hit me or was I struck by lightening type shit. You all were dead wrong for that! Cause a Spanish lady came in the store I used the phone and was calming down in video recording me and the guy was talking to my ex on the phone like he knew him. I didn’t know who it was I was scared it was taliban!!!! That’s why I wrote my in case they kill me note.

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I got lit the fuck up… finally I stopped running and asked God why… and it all stopped

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That’s why I joke and say if you run you done

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My cards keep saying there is a problem with a project or plan… OBVIOUSLY… and they not going to keep my families divided as a result… sober? EASY!!! Why bother when you won’t get that sick ass hand kissing freak off me! Besides the fact I said PARTY SENSIBLY I’m not ever going 100…

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Maybe there wouldn’t be a problem if people just speak the fuck up… even if my heart is W I’m V first and if you can’t respect that like BYE you can’t be mine or for me

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I just felt my lip and I wAnt to know who… I thought it was my V but then they been using it to abuse me. Did you see how bad they had my face knotted and I noticed my sister still has 3 and like

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The last thing I’m doing is getting married homie… why the fuck that one guy won’t stop asking me? Finally I’m to the point of every time he’s around I get sick and I’m not doing it on any level. I won’t wish him death but stay far away from me… just cause we in the same of 2 baskets doesn’t mean we are anything alike or compatible and I hate to be a bitch but I’m tired of still hearing people that are long gone… some even almost a decade gone!!!!!

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No… I don’t like money THAT much to put myself in a living hell for the rest of my life. I’m trying to get out of hell not put back in it.

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And my mom doesn’t understand why I can’t sleep with or be with a senior citizen but no way in hell either Gma… like no. Hell no!!!! I have a very specific and detailed list of what I can and can’t tolerate and the old man kissing my hands really needs to leave me alone… it’s kinda gross, and desperate, and pathetic and it turns me off and not on.

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Like V or my family watching over especially now that I’m choking and stop breathing in my sleep is one thing… an entire creed of enemies stalking me another - it’s not the same things and they are ALWAYS confused and misread our shit and I’m just like what you even doing here to begin with… you and that was never an option! And then when I pray and hear theirs first like nah you really do have the wrong bitch and I will take this to my god myself if I have to. To make you stop disrespecting me and my religion

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I’m just really upset cause how did you miss the first try to wake up and how I had to hit insanity and got dropped fighting for my head and pinky all night shackled to a chair when THEY HURT ME… so then you go and let them do it again on a how many times stronger and like… what the fuck are they even doing here to begin with after all I found out that was behind my back and like who really expects me to grant that blessing like HELL NO I rather die for real.

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I’m so serious about that I would forsake my own blood if they try to force me to

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Nah that now you see me now you don’t shit? That’s not how or why we don’t remember… not your sick didn’t even know it and from somebody and people so low too?!??? I mean what’s going on for real how does that even happen to begin with?

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They unshackled me and put me in the recliner with blankets 5 minutes before the nurses came on that morning

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Fuck being dropped the insanity was the worst part for real and like

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I know cause I stole the car and then was yelling at the cop… it don’t matter what happen to me prior there is nothing cozy or cute about our justice so like it’s obvious I ain’t even do shit… so what’s the problem make them just leave me alone!!!!

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Laugh and say fuck pire again bitch I swear…