On Top Of The World

Ok, nice peice dude, you really pulled this off. I have seen plenty of people try to write a peice like this and fail miserably, but you did very well. I couldn't stop reading this, I really enjoyed it, it had great imagery everything was described amazingly. You had complex vocab but not too complex which I like, your wording was good which helped it flow well, and the storyline was original. I liked the emotion you put into this peice, it really made the peice that much better than most peices I read, I think this is definitey HOF worthy, and I'll be nominating it soon. props dude.

YES! finally someones gonna nominate this shit rotf, thanks my nigga.

Favorite Lines:

Most can feel my pain, usually by the way I look
I mean thats why way it goes, when you take the way I took
The brave branded beasts, because they bomb these bundles
and try to find somewhere to bury bodies in the concrete jungle
that's my arts heritage, from there it starts marriages
with ventin on rhymthm, beats, and that starts lyricists

Feed:

i loved this piece man, loved the read, i like the wording, i was really imaging out the OM, make me think man, nice shit, i reall like the lines i pasted above, those were dope man...good job.

aight, opening bar was worded badly, unless theres a reference or a joke there I'm missing, but yea lol.. it wasnt worded good. aight, you had some cool lines, basically talking about rap and politics and shit these days, basically an overview of whats going on from your position on top of the world. which is cool. and something I have seen done a couple of times, maybe not exactly like this, but yea with the whole looking down and saying whats happening thingy.. still a cool piece here. liked the sophmore line, it was witty, at first I didnt feel the wording on it but then I read it again and liked it. word @ everyones a rapper these days and most of what you said. in your "but they all the dads prolly appear" line, I think you meant then instead of they there. overall this was cool though dude. had me reading and I wasnt bored while reading it, keep dropping. and hit my "A Living Chess Game" with more feed LOL. thanks

No problem, i just am all for a good open mic space and dont like when people deaden it because they consider vet status. thanks for the reply, yours'll get good feedback shortly.

I NEEDED this. Man... I'm tired of the wrist slitting, emphasis on big
words and no flow type shit I'm seeing. This was true hip-hop like
what $pit said. This was like a breath of fresh air to me. An open mic
I didnt have to struggle to get to the 8th line. You were hitting topics
I could relate to. Any real rapper could relate to and I felt the "hip-hop
culture" in this piece. Beautiful man.

Nice stuff here...title reminded me of an old song so i checkd this out...better than i thought it'd be and the flow was slick and smooth an mean. The way you described and metaphored parts was very good and also the whole negativety of the rap reality was good to. The thing about the radios playing ish was good like for some reason it reminded me of 50....don't know why though but yeah....also i liked the line about people thinking that you rappin is a stupid idea hen your an aspirer cause that is Damn true, specially when they like " Go on, freestyle then" and your in the middle of a meal and shit...but then the way that rap is propa for a succeder is true also...All in all a very good piece, with complexity hidden behind the simplicity...I liked it.
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Check this link when you get the minute na mean
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=305352

Nicce piece



flow was dopeness deep piece Nice take on title vocab waas above average dope drop keep dropin i'll keep readin

im Speechless....Krappy.

rate: 100/10

i thought your opening bar set it up nice as fuck... props, all i would say is, i prefer it when the rhymes are all blended, like instead of starting a bar with a new rhyme, but hey... thats just my style,

all round though good shit bro

Put me in your sig faggot ^

Vylint. wow. this niggas back? uh oh RB.
waddup nigga. it's been tooo long.

As far as ya peice go. Im impressed. This one hit a dead mark on the feelings on any real rapper trying to make it and get his voice heard. and that Genius line added the icing to the cake. My favorite line out this peice actually. This is a good read. Glad to have you back orphan. Pz

First off, nice read, mate.. some waves were made with this piece so I thought I'd give it a read. Your wording is something I like, more blunt than a lot of other writers on this site. You have the habit of keeping the same style throughout, i.e. way you use your multi's/flow. Reminds me of a certain Nique, which is always good. Message was something that I've read a thousand times but you gave it your own take and to be honest, Iprobably enjoyed this a lot more than other pieces.

"hood tales hardly aware that its told with a genius touch
these cats evolved into a seasoned bunch of emcees that bump
in every car in the ghetto, and even punks had beatin trunks
and it's on, caught fire and wouldnt go out... after all
this was the solution to crime and basketball"

Dope cuz you sound like you meant it..
Pleasure Vy'..
Drop a comment on my latest.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Vylint

Put me in your sig faggot ^

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lmfao, no fuck off bitch youre not worthy :)




j/p i thought you were in, *amends*

This was dope. It flowed really well and a really cool concept. The multis were very strong. And the vocab was strong aswell.

"The brave branded beasts, because they bomb these bundles
and try to find somewhere to bury bodies in the concrete jungle"

That was sooo dope

Nice job, Hit up 'Immortal Emcees' in my sig