Hate Is Such A Strong Word.

it was aiight peice i liked it it was interesting topic and interesting to read ,.........

This was an overall good piece. the flow was pretty consistent, but u cud have done a better job wit it. The word 'Hate' and 'Hatred' were used to much. You have to be creative when writing these things. Try putting some internals init and issh nah mean,
also you need to fix that struture holmes. anyway this was a nice idea never the less

what cud i have dun better with it?

and what are internals eh?

LOL. I had to find out what was the rush about this piece, and finally I did. It was a little more than average, but still kind of boring, you know? The concept was original, and I've never seen someone take on this kind of persona, except when people try to make poems out of cliches. Your vocabulary was kind of average, and your structure stayed consistent MOST of the time. Some of the lines seemed lengthy and crammed, yet it was still an okay drop.

Please see "Flipside" in Poetic Scriptures puhleese.
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=296656

uppin

I Njoi'd it.I'm personally a fan of repetitive words in OM & other ways of gettin yourself heard. This was good to me. The subject was approached n met. Wordplay was nice.Rhyme scheme was different. Flow was steady. The visual of hate is what I liked most of all.
Overall to me personally this was Good.

It was a decent piece, nothing too specail in my eyes but it was still enjoyable... the rhymescheme didnt really work for me... that along with a bit of a choppy flow and the topic, it almost made it seem more of a poem that you'd read in a kindergarden class teaching the little kids not to hate eachother. the piece had a great message 2 it tho and i could tell that it was of great importance the structure would have been good but i am not a fan of that font type and size, but so many people on this site do it so what ever im sick of complaining about it. the flow like i said was a little choppy, almost nursery rhymish, but the vocab and imagry was amazing and well put together... the rhymes could have used a little work and this piece was seriously lacking multis...

this was an okay piece but my advice to you is pick a better topic with more you can work with because i can tell this isnt your full potential... keep it up and ima keep watching. hit up the OM in my sig In The Candle Light

P.S You=Rational.?

thanx and i used that font size cz its the smallest and it made the lines not 1 line so the structure was off if u no what i mean

andn i am rational y?

dont remember me? its ta2 man. Remember u and me owned born legends, i jus brought that shit back now

o ye lol i had a lot things on ma mind recently but ye g/l wid the crew now make it dope again

more feed please

topic was pretty interesting and i liked it kept along all way thorugh...
flow was good but you gotta watch those stretched lines homie...
vocab was dope i thought...rhymes were good also overall decent keep it up.....

ok let this die so i can post up ma next 1 i have dun thanx for all the feed much appreciated

I like the topic and the word structure. But I agree, the word hatred and hate was used a lot. Still, a very nice piece. I'd really like to read more from you.

This was a nice piece.

The word hate/hatred was used too much like the others who replied said

But homs this overall was a dope piece for me. Your vocab for me was up to standard you had a nice and steady flow. The thing i loved about this piece was the topic and the vocab.

Your vocab:
You used a wide variety of words, which was held up by a good flow and emotion

Your Topic:
Was real coz there are alot of people out there who do hate and dont understand. This was a good drop homs, keep it up.

And if you wanna collab anytime, me an u shud do summit. piece

i sed b4 to let this die so i can post ma next 1 up but since u have upped it i cant so u cant see ma new work untill this dies