Sorry for my selfish love.

thankz

uppin. :noor:

damn uppin 4 feed.

nice layout..cool flow... easy to read.. concept was a lil basic in entirity..could of had a little more intrigue added in.. good styling still...
would like to see something more in depth with a twist and a turn from you

stay1

pz

bit short but it ws gd
flow ws gd and consistent
structure ws gd
rhymin ws mainly gd but a bit simple
this ws a gd drop

thankz 4 the feed

uppin. :realist:

uppin.

Nice Flow, Easy to real, Consistant Content. Nice job, Keep it up.

uppin.

that wasent that bad, could of been better. strait reading, concept was pretty basic but overall decent stuff .
7/10

Quote:

Originally Posted by .Jay.Brook.

Selfish Love.Doesnt matter what you think cause ur mind I'm starting to hate.
bad socialsm, we argue N' yell more than we conversate.
improper love why can't we just live easy N' understand.
hold hands. kiss in public just be happy N' laugh everytime we can.
.
.
tears drop on her chest slowly, shirt rinckles up, lips tremble.
crys unfinished, tears get thicker, body shakes as we resemble.
she grabs my thoughts then use them against me like a weapon.
ear drum's tickle as I hear her heart pound every other secound.
wimps N' weaknisses come out of her, N' secrets start to release.
tells me her fears no arguments or accusements finally its peace.
conversation's continues as our love and thought's deeping.
hug her tighter grip hardens as her voice cracks N' she weakens.
as minutes N' time past I again cross into her heart's path.
finally tears fall away, regain's her voice as we start to kiss N' laugh.
.
.
baby I didn't know your problems didn't know whats above.
N' I'm sorry I'm wondering if you can forgive me 4 my selfish love.

just made this

Its not that bad, You can do better.