A Soldier's Sorrow

Nice Drop...i especially liked the line: In battle believe it or not I was always scared 2 go
A soldier’s deepest fear!
……Dying before accomplishing more

This was a deep peace a little bit more vocab. would make it deeper but nice man

Nice Drop...i especially liked the line: In battle believe it or not I was always scared 2 go
A soldier’s deepest fear!
……Dying before accomplishing more

This was a deep peace a little bit more vocab. would make it deeper but nice man
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still here and uppin...that reply was from a cousin of my using my name at the time but still looking for feedback...uppin

flow was weak ann not all sentences rhymed. sort out da rhymes nd keep it up.

uppin

the topic is fucking Great, yo. the things you talk about are extremely interesting. but it seems you have the same problem i do. just writing our true emotions without any structure. it is a great fucking OM but to become a song it would need better stucture. i wish i would have come up with that idea. but the hungry kid gets the food, right? nice fucking job on the real. you've inspired me to write tonight and that takes a lot since i am currently deployed in Iraq. keep this shit up.

thankz jo. uppin

hey i liked that piece im feeling it, was deep 2!...nice flow, you should try out an audio 4 it...should be good
hope 2 c more in the future :D

Not bad, for the most part I enjoyed it, easy to follow, one thing id probably suggest is that you branch out scheme-wise, try something a little different, switch it up every so often to keep the reader interested. I enjoyed this piece. The potentials there, just keep working at it.

aiight il use that advice

uppin

uppin

uppin

yo, return the favor...

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=269190

i'm feelin this peice real life shit, nice flow too