Hate-hate Relationship

My Replies:
breakin/Double-o-seven
Get on the mic/Deva
Angellical R/I cannot die.....

INTRO
People are hated, baited, and uneasily sedated, in their mind overrated
Think the world's against them, Think everyone's jealous cuz their the gem
Their wrong, and the road of error their on is long, To understand read the song

Hate-Hate relationship, happens when you shoot from the hip
Don't think about what you say before it slips thru ur lip
Leads to a stressful day, like hit wit whips, cuz ur heart quick flip
People want to love you, But in the end everyone claims fuck you
Being in ur head is like a loud zoo, ur the catepillar tuckd in the cuckoo
ur psychies got u thinkin ur loved, when really ppl want 2 merk u wit hands gloved

CHORUS:
Hate-Hate Relationship, Every body hates You
Claim you hate them wit the next rip, Nobody likes you
Your mother despises you, Damn and she birthed you

Hate-Hate Relationship, Happens when you let your responsibilities lack
Claim to love ur children, need them like air with out em your wack
Last time you saw your son, was when he came into this world 1985
His hope of seeing u had died and is done, hate in his heart be thankful ur alive
This year he graduates from high school, only plans, not 2 b like u and he'll b cool
All the shit you missed damn ur a fool, this soon to b man shoulda been ur crowned jwl

CHORUS:
Hate-Hate Relationship, Everybody Hates You
Claim u hate them with the next rip, nobody likes you
your mother despises you, damn she birthed you

Hate-Hate relationship, happens when you live for the love of money
Only way ur happy when ur bling-bling equip, and on ur arm an iced up honey
when the looks fade away, stupid expectations like a fire hose you spray,
Puts out the fire like a fireworks display, and sends the hot love on her way and u pay
You stand in the hallway stupid on repossession day, thought u could have it all w/o debts pay
Now you claim to hate the world coming to actual, the world hates u and that's factual

OUTRO:
I hope now you have a basic understanding, or have I traveled into a land
That is ruled by an intelligence ban, Why a hate-hate relationship happens and when it can
I'm tired and this rhyme is expired so for the night my writing is retired
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OK I FUCKED UP THE STRUCTURE BAD BUT WHAT DID YOU ALL THINK OF THE VOCAB USAGE AND THE TOPIC AND THE WAY I PRESENTED IT?:laugh2:

the shit is pretty fucken tight............
word usage and imadry was there and the structure may lack but it is easy to catch so your covered there all and all an ill peaace

wordplay was tight
flow was ight
I was feelin it and i wasnt
7/10

word thanx

yo I also wanted to say that it is an honor to have someone who is a veteran(word perfect) that really liked my shit i hope i can fix my structure prob.

you got a nice vocabulary, your wordplay was good, you created some nice immagery. just fix ya structure.
nice drop.




look at 'racist' in a few minutes when i post it up.

no doubt

sorry double o didn't see it thanx for the reply though

Nice piece i wasnt really feelin it but hey whatever floats ur boat!!.....n like da othas said jus elevate more!!

(nice avy bastard lol)

good shit for your posts, not a newb either?

good vocab a lil work wording your sentences maybe

everything else was good, flow, topic, structure

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just turned flyweight, but i still a newbie compared to some of these thousand post ppl, FreeBase congrats on ur elevation light weight, Im a try to get to that point where everybody feeling my shit keep elevatin but even than can't please everybody so thanx for your post flowlucious pc.

i gotta say i agree with the general feeling...quite a good drop...again with the structure......but i wasnt really feeling the hook, too short .....but nice drop overall.....pZ...

thanx pz

yea..
the hook coulda been better
flow was off at some points
other wise this was a good drop

thanx uppin keep postin on dis pz and luv