"Theatre of the Mind" - Jonathon & Dr. Limitless

"Theatre of the Mind" - Jonathon & Dr. Limitless

Thunderous applause -
the whistling, and
dropping of jaws. The
curtains close, down -
pours the wave of roses;
with a swift movement
like Moses. The path
clears out, the audience
cheers my name. As if it’s
just a fake vision; within
a simple game. But my
magic is real; pick a card
and, I’ll win the deal. The
rabbit in the hat won’t
come out, until ...

My motion picture fixtures
its vicous denchers,
biting love in the bottom.
Sighting temptations,
flying around since autom.
Flowers blooming,
shooting up from their roots,
to see if they'll suit,
their patient viewer.
Yet, death - comes sooner,
stentch, squinting noses
notice; they're approaching
a metaphorical sewer.

Lethal expressions; remise
the crowd to turn. To despise
my magical appearance. To
compromise my deliverance.
They fear my magic; they’ve
saddened. I must be arrested
for “False Impersonation” -
lies! To the peoples surprise
my artistic blood; dies. Arise
the souls of a thousand magicians.
As for my “Corpse”, justified
that in my mind lies a theatre.

When I find time to sit back,
and walk the fine line of facts.
Realizing what darness hides,
and watch my thoughts glide
as I lack pride - through the eyes
of god himself, up from the sky.
I try to disquise my face,
and run away from this place,
in which pain rains from the clouds,
and thunderous words speak loud.
So view this movie, play, or scene,
hastely paste your heart to the screen.
Scream! Fear shot you in the brain,
but illusions of the mind -
are insainly hard to contain.
The lights brighten from their dim,
crowds leave, happily,
yet a few are left grim...
A tragic ending, magic sending
spells and ghost within me,
Through the back of my eyelids,
it leaves me excited,
Who created this crazy thing?
The sandman came,
and created a dream.

Dr. Limitless
Jonathon

Nice read. Rise up family.

Don't be sleepin yo.

uppin.

Uppin! I Will Rtf!

As will I

This was pretty dope. I liked the way the two different styles complimented each other that was a pretty good match up. The content was str8 but i was feeling the fast paced motion of it all. It was really one of those pieces that draws you in and makes you read it to the end. Nice emotion and some nice metaphores from both of you. Only thing i would say was to try and not make it read like a paragraph, make it a little more rhythmic, doesnt have to rhyme. Nice drop.

One

People like rhyming :).
Thanks for the feed.
Leave links.

lol i know, im just saying it dosnt have to, it just has to be lyrical ya dig
Anyway my piece is right below yours

One

rise.

uppin.

uppin for more than one feeder.

How fuckin hard is it too leave feedback on a peice? Honestly.