Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
The Practice of Self-Denial
Verse 1&3 : Mariah
Verse 2&4 : Engivale
The pages etched as life turns the leaf
Flaming tongues speak as mine burns with grief
Hurt the reflection, the twinkle left me
Hollow bones to match the soul once it emptied
I became the source of pain that killed
Let me explain, let me refrain, stains revealed
Talk of what might be, kindess unlikely
The falses do blind me, the heartaches untimely
Feeling bad for the thoughts, so bent
Glass veins and a cold heart I had in the moment
Truth is harsh, that's not where it hurts
But knowing my faults, convicts me the worst
Rivalry is the trial we
Smile idolly through-
All the while we knew
That the self-denial was true...
If pleasure is pain, then
I pressure the vein that
Makes me learn to
Confess for my Shame...
I drop the bottle to model
After the Squabble is
Now Me Grovelling,
I'm done Following
This Laughter is Soul's
Hollowing Pasture...
If swallowing's nastier,
I spit out the drink...
I'd rather be sober
Than flattery's coaster---
Puke... without the Sink...
Luke warm piss, shout and think
That if you live doubt's the thing
and I deny my only right
to Be Happy---
...South I sink...
I claw the ground as this circus surrounds
Higher than any, I just find every person a clown
My mind in relapse, in sync with the rest
Truth is real, sadness fills the weakness of breath
It hurts how it sounds, the verbs can resound
But the name of myself echoes, perfection renown
I'm a mountain to many, an obstacle to me
Burdened by thoughts of how I'm impossible to beat
It's an anomoly, my life's a monopoly
Firm as a rock, pride is the guide that I brought with me
Self-realization is suffering, a sadistic radical
But the bittersweet hope, now the music to Madrigal
My bong vibrates,
The song gyrates
Primates move Spies
Made by Rude Dry Spades..
The lie fades, Truth is Born
An excuse is torn from
This toothless horned Pig,
My zoos are formed
From this Ruthless Scorned Ship
Where Bermuda's Storm hit...
I want what I hate,
And I steal what is free-
God taught me to state
How it feels to be me...
Loose wheels to refeed
The Lions Den-
I'm Cryin' when I steal weed
To Be Zion's Friend...
And I sigh and spend
My Time with Thoughts...
Nice try, I'm lost
But I'm forced by the Boss to
Deny my Pen...
(...stop writing...our ultimate self-denial)
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=327012
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=326402
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
This piece was just EXTRA DOPE. So, I took what a few of my favorites from each line and put them at the bottom. And, both of you did a great job on this, very great job. I didn't see much parts where anything fell off. Only like 5 bars, at the most. And, thats with both them combined. But, everything else, was really dope. Now, just do an audio of it, lol.
Mariah....
-----------------------------------------------
Let me explain, let me refrain, stains revealed
Talk of what might be, kindess unlikely
The falses do blind me, the heartaches untimely
Feeling bad for the thoughts, so bent
Glass veins and a cold heart I had in the moment
Truth is harsh, that's not where it hurts
But knowing my faults, convicts me the worst
-------------------------------------------------
Engivale....
-------------------------------
Smile idolly through-
All the while we knew
That the self-denial was true...
If pleasure is pain, then
I pressure the vein that
Makes me learn to
Confess for my Shame...
-------------------------------
Mariah....
------------------------------------------------------
I'm a mountain to many, an obstacle to me
Burdened by thoughts of how I'm impossible to beat
It's an anomoly, my life's a monopoly
Firm as a rock, pride is the guide that I brought with me
-------------------------------------------------------
Engivale.....
---------------------------------
The lie fades, Truth is Born
An excuse is torn from
This toothless horned Pig,
My zoos are formed
From this Ruthless Scorned Ship
Where Bermuda's Storm hit...
I want what I hate,
And I steal what is free-
God taught me to state
How it feels to be me...
Loose wheels to refeed
The Lions Den-
--------------------------------
Like I said before, very dope. And, you two should hook up again, really. And, Engivale, you did a real good job, too.. Putting your verses together and sticking with the flow. The end verse with the Toothless Horned Pig, was dope. Im out, and ill be keep an eye out for both of you. -un0-
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
no problem, just keep dropping.......
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
i like this piece, some hof material. both of u wote some deep shit. had good vocab, imagery. this shit is just fire. this shit shouldn't be slept on like it is
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
Hof worthy imo. Mariah you came very nice, your structre was very easy to follow and you came very nice with flow, you came at the topic very well but i feel you didnt put enough thought in your piece to get your emotion to stand out, which was the only thing I feel you couldve worked on, Eng you came very nice and cover everything that mariah didn't, your piece's fit perfectly together...both of you had very little flaws but I'm a big fan of short lines with such creativity that Eng's verse grab my intrest the most. I will be nominating this piece, sorry for my feed being so dull, I'm dead tired.
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
i agree wit dj....this piece is def hof worthy....i can't be mad at nothin which would be a first for some time.....u had the topic down....u kept the flow fluid....u worded everything nicely to make it a pleasent read while including a very nice vocab...emotional this piece is up there too....like i said can#t be mad at all
9/10 cuz there's always somethin better
lol go check my drops for c#s sake
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
thx to every1 who left feed... i'll be rtfing after work.
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
wow 3 nominations in the nom thread...honored
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
uppin again...thanks aagin for the feed
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
Okay a pretty good piece on this kind of issue...
Mariah: You had some speeling mistakes, not a biggie but they stuck out while i was readin..i'm a bit picky at that though recently i haven't checked my own pieces for speelings so yeah..anyhow, i thought your first verse wasn't as strong as it should or could have been at times you based too strongly on the rhymescheme..your 2nd verse was an improvement, more enojyable and better with the flow as well.
Engivale: you already know i like the flowin ish lol..anyway, yeah both your verses flowed nicely, slower at times then faster but i, again, preffered the 2nd verse, no idea why here as bnoth of your verses were nicely put, i just reckon that verse 1 was a warm up for verse 2 and you were more in the element by the time you started the 2nd verse.
All in all, a good and balanced colab that was an enjoyable read in my opinion.
couple of comments
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=327168
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
as you spelled "spelling" incorrect twice :rolleyes:
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
uppin this again for us Eng
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
^Was she really banned. Wtf@ all the contributing people being banned. Anyway, this was really good. Best piece I've read from Mariah. Engivale, I wasn't really feeling the style of writing you used..it was a bit too short, like the lines and stuff, but you managed to make this work. The styles complimented each other nicely and the flow and transitions were smooth. Probably the smoothest collabo I've read in a while. I liked how you both stayed on topic also. This was a really good piece.q
Re: Mariah featuring Engivale, "Self-Denial"
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mariah.
as you spelled "spelling" incorrect twice :rolleyes:
Yup i do that lol. :noor: