Murder stories- featuring James

(James)
There's was this cat named John known to let his gat blaze/
He was wild smoking tical always saying crime pays/
Anyways we passed ways, and he ran off at the mouth/
Saying he heard i had beef with his man "Dirty south"/
I said yeah i snatched his pimp cup, knocked his fronts out/
I left a scar on his face, he smiled and got knocked the fuck out/
Some Young Buck tried to bring it,and got shot up Tony Montana style/
I skipped town scared of a murder trial, anyhow John said nigga you dead know/
I just laughed and said you don't know my methods man/
He cocked his weapon fam, and the trigger jammed/
The time was 4:21 i put the bullet in his brain (blam!)/
Somehow he survived the shot, know he's too def to hear his own jams/
I forgot about his man's street, this nigga they called him Life/
He caught me pumpin' on his block, and his crew P.L.O. pulled out gats right in my face/
I'm lucky cops came know i'm safe/
But U know the gods bizzare, he seen me again and gave chase/
The nigga said Welcome back, i busted the gat in his face.. ohhh shit i just murdered Mase

(Dead president) Aka- Wu banga

Young black male was kilt late last night
Around 2:00 A.m., blood spilt ina fast fight
The autopsy revealed mad bruises on the face
Traces of mace on the skin,
Plus another mans blood on a shoelace
The bar manager stated he was always involved in scuffles
Provoke’in trouble, but he came off kind and suttle
I’ve seen him on the UC bus shuttle in the back
Sick ass cat, stomach bubbled on impact
Knew him for like 3 years, didn’t shed one tear
He was always start’in beef, so his mother feared
That this day would come soon, and it did violently
Notified her that after noon, she wept slow and silently
Seed came racin down the stairs like whats wrong?
He should have been wit his brother
Instead of abuse’in and fuckin up on some bongs
Came down not shocked yo, son comforted her and I peeled out
Now I’m walkin through the blocks wit my mutherfuckin steel out
But too late, the cops had the main suspect in custody
Since he was kilt on my block, somehow the blame rushed to me
Like I was there and could have stopped it
But knowin the dude who did it, he probably popped him
For a good reason, I heard he committed treason against his legion
Doin business in other cities’s regions, plus he faggin, male pleasein
Suckin dicks, said it was for his older sister’s sickness
Fuckin sickening, the only thing I liked about his sister was her thickness
And now its everlasting conflicts, make me want to bomb shits
Got family in the palm bricks*, can’t go out the house until dawn hits
Moved about a week ago, to raise my peoples in nearby Dayton
The first classics I wrote is old, now i write sequels called anti satans
Peace to all the mothers greaving, from peeps left bleeding
These is pro-life teachings, against so-trife proceedings


links:http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...11#post5140211
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...49#post5140249

James is a user from another website, we got together and mad this piece on the other site and i'm posting it on this site too.

this wasnt that good.. the spelling in it was pretty bad and it lacked vocabulary and any rhymescheme at all.. the only advice i got is to keep writing and you'll get better.

Bra when i say shit like pleasin, that means pleasing, i know how to spell shit but thats not how i wanna say it, cuz i don't say shit how its spelled. Its slang. Like fuckin and suckin, start'in, abuse'in. I say that shit cuz i ain't saying abusing, i'm sayin abuse'in wit out the g. like provoke'in, i ain't saying provoking, i'm sayin provoke'in. Its just the way that i speak.

And schemes ain't everything, ask Too $hort, multi platinum artist

i really didnt like piece that much it was kinda elementary you guys barely stayed on topic on this piece bra you feel off and on and you voacab was terrible just work on how you set up on ur piece get a better structure mann and that could have more people feed on your shit how you set it up almost made me leave this thread but you got mad potential just need to take some sand paper and smooth out ur edges on on your piece over rall mann not so good of a drop

Best part of this

Suckin dicks, said it was for his older sister’s sickness
Fuckin sickening, the only thing I liked about his sister was her thickness

Decent drop

by the way hit up one of my links the mouth that never opened in return

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Wu banga

Bra when i say shit like pleasin, that means pleasing, i know how to spell shit but thats not how i wanna say it, cuz i don't say shit how its spelled. Its slang. Like fuckin and suckin, start'in, abuse'in. I say that shit cuz i ain't saying abusing, i'm sayin abuse'in wit out the g. like provoke'in, i ain't saying provoking, i'm sayin provoke'in. Its just the way that i speak.

And schemes ain't everything, ask Too $hort, multi platinum artist

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no fucking shit its slang dumbass, im talking about all the words that aren't really 'slang' that you spelled wrong... and i never said that rhymescheme was everything.. and your doing text not audio, so don't say "ask Too Short".

A scheme is scheme wether written or spoken, and again the reason i wrote the words like i did was for emphasis on that if i were speakin it i wouldn't say certain words with the ing ending, i would cut off the g and say stuff like i stated before, the only thing i spelled wrong not on purpose was suttle. And who da fuck cares about spelling