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Blue Wolf
7/16-17 11:30p.m.-12:45a.m.
a heart is where the sorce is in, giving up isnt forfitin',
the sun isnt distorded when, a full moons orbitin'
pardoned sir, he stepped out of the restaurant a martyr
sparklin in the moonlight within his four fathers fur
clammed, his stance grew, the adrenalin glands too
ran to his mans crew, & gallopped as he scanned thru
a snout emerged as someones shout he heard
a little birdie of his own let him in on that lousy bird
about 12 midnight, mehh it isnt late,
he'll catch that snitch, the bitch is fake
the claws ripped from fingernails to eviscerate
his krypton was silver bling, walking like wolverine
he grasped a handful of shadow to pull a skeme
ghastly laughs elapse in the alley way, & sadly fade
serving commotion over death, & quicc to retalliate
hes the blue wolf...
the daytime promises stacc's of cash
then moonlight... the blue wolf
looking out for his pacc
...the blue wolf...
7/17 1:30a.m.-5:35a.m.
he looked thru a window, ruby is there with a passenger
had no fur, and the wooden door creaked over lavender
in a basement, since he cut thru the red lobby
ruby & lead hobbies, he seen 2 dead bodies
hearin ruby skills bitchin, he got his fill in the kitchen
caught his boy in the hall, "how u like killin & snitchin?"
ruby's boy almost let out a scream, in a rabid style
silently grasped his vitals, with a passive smile
blood exhillaration, he made sure the ants got crumbs
--picked up what he was holding--
...now a werewolf w/ a shotgun...
in a door cracc, the skin shows, thru a grey vein,
the sins flow,
he found ruby, and blasted his ass out the window
threw him his boys head, ruby's quicc to pass a limb
scabbed a scrimp, leaped out the window after him
not to late to warn, but the hate will mourn,
he played on a ruby organ til the brake of dawn
hes the blue wolf...
the daytime promises stacc's of cash
then moonlight... the blue wolf
looking out for his pacc
...the blue wolf...
7/16 2:00p.m.-2:45p.m.
making a reservation, to take his beauty to eat
if it was anywhere else he knew she would leave
brought her home, known to rearrange if it clutters
a knock on the door--he became to stutter
a life lost w/out a paddle, his nieghbor on sed plateu
red chain, red eyes, red kicks, red neck, red afro
"frozen pipes? im the plumber..." wait...its the summer
hes already inside "the names ruby bitch, now slumber"
knob nulled, pistol pulled, mist erupted from steel
made a blast so loud jisted the thundered appeal
penetration, "concider it your medication"
ripped up his wife as she cried, in his dieing eyes
ruby had her raped, he wont forget this lieing guy
before ruby blasted, a wisp escaped her lips
save me
the red man walked upstairs and stabbed his baby
a whole family gone, not blue yet, no use
ruby turned the T.V. onto the news...
he laughs and says "i know your other scouts"
a screen says a flame obliterated his mothers house
ruby lights a cig walking out the door... "fuck.."
and while the door closes, in comes a mutt
"please...the phone" and extends to stand
---the dog then bites his hand---
hes the blue wolf...
the daytime promises stacc's of cash
then moonlight... the blue wolf
looking out for his pacc
...the blue wolf...
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I really liked this peice dude,it was a very interesting and enjoyable read. Your storyline was great I loved the plot of thios peice and the imagery made it a hell of a lot more enjoyable to read. You can really tell a very good story, and I can't wait to see another drop from you, I really got in to this peice and I didn't want it to end, and that is one hell of a compliment because most of the time I can't get in to Oms as well as I did with this one. I really liked this, keep dropping dope shit like this and no doubt you will elevate a shit load my dude. You have just shown me that you are not just a battker, you have other hidden qualities too lol good shit dude, keep at it.
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Like said ebaove, this was a very enjoyable read not what i expected from a battler. Your storytelling covered some technical potholes well and the rhymes you used were at time exclusive therefore i don't believe i have to tell you to use original ideas. I liked the flow it had a rap flow with a story which was impressive. Imagery was really good too. I reckon that if you build on this you will reach knew heights as at times i had no idea with which word the line would end.
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Keep at it, and if you can leave some commetns on my new piece:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=301685
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this had such a grimey feel to it. your rhymes are off the hook and you got some kinda crazy flow. i thought this was an overall good piece. it would sound deadly as an audio.
keep up the good work man.
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this piece had some nice imagry the most that i followed. i like the time line thing in this it caught my eyez real well. the flow was craccin the spot(hot). okay vocabulary, but u use it very well through ya lines.. fams keep writing...
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