Water Under the Bridge

Water Under the Bridge
- Te Ora

Often they’d choose - on chairs they traded their views
Coaxing & hoping the other be persuaded to lose
When one of their ego’s became… jaded and bruised
He’d remove himself quickly –
Slowly waited and mused
Before returning… where upon, he stated amused
A compelling inconsistency, which truncated their truce
They debated the news, anything which roused a dispute
Despite their differences they both housed one truth…

An opinion or view,
Must be meticulously brewed
To perfection…
Then vehemently defended
Because when its surrended
Rendered untended & ended
Or left in the stand
Conformity occurs,
“Conformity is the death of a man”

Weakness… so solemn men are granted meekness
Great minds think alike, they were each others anti-thesis
Each day they ranted – in attempts to leave the other speechless
But each day victory…
Stood barely beyond each of their reaches
One would rarely be fond, to see the other seated
On lunch breaks… aware, that near, another heated
Argument loomed, another argument doomed
To end in an agreement :
To disagree – yet their targets consumed
Them… as they threw darts
At new parts of carefully constructed notions
… their dearly conducted devotions
Became subject of the commotion

The son of our holy father, a wholly martyr…
Who was crucified on the cross, to solely carter –
For our sins… to barter, for our second chances
And garnered to beckon all of our reckoned stances
One stated, “Jesus was a Jew until the day he died!”
The other, a devoted Christian, cried…
“BLASPHEMY! All that you say is lies!”
Displayed his pride, in his hand lay a cross
He shook it fervently, to get his point across
But felt anointed loss…
When the Jewish man shook his head,
Silently stared, giving him a look of dread -
Then took his bread, from the lunch table
Left the Christian seething, as his punch failed…
To hit anything… but that lunch table

Worse case –
A few days later water crept under the bridge
Minutes away from their workplace
An ambient glow descended & meandered on flow
As ripples swept onto the rocks –
Where lay a slanderous show
This mantle was low…
& might require a candle to show
It’s secret – beneath the bridge, the steadiest of drops
In between the ridges & crevasses of rocks
The Everest of shocks entailed if one saw
The trail of entrails, spread on the shore
Shreds of this gore sprang from a mangled body
Which angled oddly – yielded to adapt
Slapped, trapped… against the boulders
Which formed a shield for it’s back
& submerged the head, which converged instead
With shallow waters & merged with filth
… Minutes away a man splurged his guilt
Passed the time, with a glass of wine
Drunk & forgotten
While the body conformed to slip… & sunk to the bottom
On the verge of this perk –
An eyeball lifted from the scene, emerged from the murk
… & drifted down the stream

Did one of the men die?
If so which one?
In what way did he die?
How far will you take your views?

* To avoid confusion I wish to state that Te Ora is the name I am going to be writing under... until I can get a name change

Speak Heaven
With Rap, Comes Blood.

Perhaps if I request feed. . .

That was pretty good eh, It kept me interested the whole way through, you got talent,....... however there was a few points where I lost the flow, but still sounded good. Structure was pretty tight, had the beginning, middle an end, and link em all together pretty well, Nice rhymes complemented it, but overall great story telling, keep it up an I wanna see more.

this was a played topic but yet a nice diffrent unique approach towards the topic man nice emotion and vocab was really feeling this drop. i liked your twist ion the stroy telling and the multie execution of vocab mayne really nice...

stay up and RTF on the links in my sig please!

Feed much appreciated. I'll get to rtf on your links a little later. Up.

Holy shit. This was dopeasfuck. The imagery was profound, yet you kept it fast paced with the rhyming. The first stanza was my favorite because the flow was the smoothest and it drew me into your story a lot more. The only thing I didn't like..or let me say..was 'confusing' was when you transitioned into a 3 line rhyming style. I lost the flow for a little bit, but it picked back up..anyway..this was niiiiice...the story was well developed. nothing was too vague or too profound, so much so that it went over my head. this was good. i'm nominating it. good shit.

Wow thnx a lot. Too bad the HOF nomination thread is closed aha. Uppin for feed.

Up. . .

Gay.

This was good... interestin & structure well for a easy flow
I liked the 2nd & 3rd mains the most... the 1st not so much but still was good
4th was ok but i think the rest of it was much better imo

Weakness… so solemn men are granted meekness
Great minds think alike, they were each others anti-thesis
Each day they ranted – in attempts to leave the other speechless
But each day victory…
Stood barely beyond each of their reaches

That shit right there was nice as... best part by far

One stated, “Jesus was a Jew until the day he died!”
The other, a devoted Christian, cried…
“BLASPHEMY! The words you say are lies!”
Displayed his pride, in his hand lay a cross
He shook it fervently, to get his point across

Like this bit too... dope imagery... felt this

I was keep interested the whole way through... cept maybe the last few lines
Only cos the 4th was decent but it jus didn't stand out to me like the rest

Nice shit though man for real... keep that shit up

this was good, I liked it all.......good flow and structure, good story

good peice...topic was mad different and pretty interesting
flow was nice throughout. good strucutre
imagery and vocab was nice..good rhymes
overall this was a good peice.keep it up.

Thnx...

Up.

this the rawest i heard so far

i aint read the whole thing tho but the first part was nice

Thnx yall. Last up.