Two sides of a Fight

This story is one of the up most importance
So pay attention, and decide who is in the right
As we look at Two sides of a fight

The thin blade silently eased itself through
Glinting in the over head light of the moon
The thunder crashed above, the lightning struck
As we see what happens when you run amuck
The fearful prisoner glanced down in pain
As the sparkling sword penetrated a vain
How could his brain actually stay sane?
His eyes filled with tears, his face grew old
Revealing secrets………previously untold
The cold reality, of what was about to unfold
Stared straight into his face, but he couldn’t see it
As the fire was eventually lit, I watched the crowd sit
And laugh at his torture with satisfaction
This was the time for drastic action

So with a willing heart, he put himself to the test
And attempted to save this man from certain death

I pondered on what to do, for a minute or so
While the fire continued to grow, I had to go
Soon, or his life would be gone, I crept
Across the lawn, behind the growing crowd
The fire was really glowing now, I crept across
The weathered rocks, determined to not have another loss
To my movement, so I gathered up my men, I counted ten
That would not be enough to take on all of them
So I searched the crowd, for gullible souls and minds
I offered them glory, if they help us through this time
They, being stupid and young agreed on the spot
The first shot, echoed in the air, fear filled this place
the father’s of the new recruits, looked at them in disgrace
The perverted minds of this common vulgar people
Thought, that what they were doing was legal

These men charged forward bravely to help a friend
If they lose they will meet the same sticky end


Hordes fight, while swords slice, and four lives
Have already been lost, there will be more tonight
I run up to the fire and quickly untie the captured
man, He is free, now he must help us capture
This evil land, that walks hand in hand
With Satan himself, have these men come from hell?
Well they’re going back now, I inhale the smell
Of the smoke and the ashes, then rush in optimistically
I kill a man, then I pay the ultimate penalty
I look round, a man stands before with his sword raised
He slices half my face, I run at a growing pace
But he just won’t give up, he grabs my throat
Begins to choke, me until blood stains my coat
And my soul is tarnished, the end is here
I look round in reverence and fear, as a tear
Drips woefully down by shattered face
My life is gone, I can not be saved, I search
For men, they all are dead, I realise then
That the man who has me captured, and is killing me
Is one of the stupid young men, he laughs cynically

So the mission was a failure, and the leader died
But let’s have a look at the other side

We were just having fun, a bit of a laugh
Toasting this boy was just something to pass
The time, so why did these idiots take it serious?
I can’t understand, they must be delirious
He walked to me, and offered me fortune and health
Inside I thought ‘I would rather rot in hell’
But I decided to join and proceed with my master plan
The hand of the man, was either tanned,
or dirty, I shook it fervently, and he began to demand
What he wanted off me, so I pretended to agree
Hoping he didn’t notice that I was gritting my teeth
So we ran in, I did not kill, instead I followed him
He untied the man, they ran, both of them covered in sin
For they betrayed this town, ripped it limb from limb
they killed all the women, they thought they were demons
know they will feel the wrath, of this village's people.

Now it’s easy to see that once ago they were friends
But now there will be a bitter fight to the end

I grabbed him hard and proceeded to suffocate him
I don’t think he could understand what I was saying
He was in pain, after I mauled half his face
He looked up from the ground in distaste
He knew know that he had been betrayed

So who is in the right? What is your opinion?
What side should be known as the devil’s minions?

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...39#post4482339

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...44#post4482344

upping

please don't sleep on this

Okay,
You actually arent a bad writer - and seeing as you're only fifthteen, this was very impressive. You have a really descriptive quality to your drops, which will help a lot as you progress in terms of the imagery needed when conveying topical pieces. What you do need to work on though is your rhyme-schemes and multies, because those will improve your pieces ten fold. Seriously. You`re another kid with potential, and another who could potentially make an impact on the board, but whether you choose to do it or not is on you. If you knuckle down, read up on multies and rhyme scheme (There are tutorials up in the Help forum ..), and work at it - you'll become a great writer. Ive no reservations about that. The potential's evident here, I thought you did a great job with this piece man, and love how you rounded this up with a question posed at the reader to decide what they'd do. It was a nice twist, something refreshing. Originality is always welcomed here! Stick around, join the SS league if you havent already.

Mucho props.

thanks for the positive feed,it's appreciated and advice will be used

I don't think I'm ready to join SS yet tho

ooping

Grrr...... upping

word

yep

come on you lazy slut bags