my misTake ...

check


i had you. i loved you like a thief's hands on a diamond
im lost in love. falling to my knees on the sands of an island
the precious glimpse of your face, i wait to hold with a hug
the tears that you cried, when i described a coma of love
but you know what i love
the aroma of blood, shadows creep as walls crack old and stumble
such a world thats humble, we could watch our life unfold and crumble
we could of grew old, but you dont get the sense of a white picket fence
lets grow old... or maybe you're right, its this life you live against
explain why my life is a joke, explain why you decicided to go
i should have a fuckin knife to your throat for writin that note
but fuck it, it fuckin hurt so much!! god... lets just keep in touch
lets sleep and fuck, cuz i promise you wont be breathing much
MAN!! i fucking had you, i fucking loved you! where was my mistake
i was LOST IN LOVE with you!..oh....wait...was that my mistake?

Another emotional piece...I forget whos i read just now...But I hate to critique such a touchy subject...which it seems it is just that...I can tell this was just raw emotion...An you cant critique raw emotion...This is poetic feeling through your eyes...good job...keep writing...I wont give constructive critiscism to a subject like this...Ill just leave you with this...Keep writing...good job...peace...

When you get a chance hit my latest up...thanks...peace...
Fallen Angels
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=292765

^^word, I gotta agree and respect on that...
but just to say: I was feelin' your multies... really gave this piece an edge on lyrical skill aswell as the deep emotion. nice job

ye man word on both of the above. emotional shit man n i luv dat!!! u portrayed diff emotions n it wuz nice man. flow wuz gud aswell. jus keep it up ill watch ou 4 u l8r homie. 1

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