-
In Darnkess' Sphere.
In Darkness' Shpere.
by M.G.
As I entered the room, it screamed foul play
disheveled items strewn on the floor, the wall wore bloody writing, such dismay
a crime scene what does it all mean, questionable display
The stench of cheap cologne tickled my senses, accompanied by burning flesh
Maybe it was me, indiscreetly crumbling under stress...
As fear overcomes me my hand fumbles for my pistol in case something lingers
Cold steel I feel slipping through my sweaty palms and clumsy fingers
My first instict caused me to think, but my mind drew a blank, I blink
When i read the writing on the wall scrawled in blood my heart seemed to fall and sink
Diminishing me to but a speck of the creator's ink
"Death Comes Swift To Those Who I Frame"
under a picture charred around the edges was my name
I am but a simple man how did i get involved in this deadly game
I compose myself to at least give the room a thorough search
Then my eyes wandered to the mantle...where a razor with a bloody handle was perched
blood dripping from the blade, my heart again lurched
I had to escape,but wait first.......
I swab the red liquid slowly trickling sending sensations down my spine
just then I heard a muffled breath....A scuffle step that was not mine
Struggling to cock my gun, I raise the barrel fixated on the door
As i heard the click of the steel, the sound made my cranium pound once more
I was chilled to my very core, what more did evil have in store?
As i colloect myself and attempt to leave with stealt, inconspicously
I walk out the threshold and the window shoots open suspiciously
And I see a menacing sihloutte, I pull the trigger viciously.........
.
.BANG.
.
I heard the shells echo of the pavement
but my eyes wouldn't wander from my yonder engagement
The sihloutte looms closer unaffected by my action
I'm no longer a man, when i stand, I'm only but a fraction
As the shadow approaches I reload and commence to fire
.Nothing.
Just ricochette's, my need is indeed dire
In the final second before the thing was upon me
I demand to know what I'm facing, I scream "Tell Me"
...............Silence for a moment, I just stare......................
Then shadow revelas a face, shedding a layer
The devilish being caused me to utter a prayer.........
I prayed that I was never there.
"It is your time," is the booming voice that I hear
5 seconds of lonely fear..
Then darkness consumes me and to this day I reside inside Darkness' Shpere.
-
I'm Getting the links right now.
-
-
Hmmm.....
Nice peice.
Not really what I expected when I read the title but yeah it give originality.
First off i'd say that the emotion of this peice was astonishing but not as good as the Imagery. I really like the imagery and how you expressed the thoughts into this OM. That good also you might want to check on the spelling. No great work is good with out a spell check. so you do that iight.
overall 7.2/10
Please feedback on
The Conscience Struggle
and/or
Land Of Slavery
-
-
Thanks paramik and i alreday fed your piece fam....
-
This piece was very good. I liked it alot. the imagery was very good in this piece, It felt like I was there. the vocab was also good. had a few mispelled words but who doesn't. your structure was great and I also liked the concept. good work on this one. keep it up.
-
word, i like this shizz mang, original and good imaginary.
im about to go to sleep over here, so ill just give you an avarage for now.
7.5/10
clap,clap
-
Thanks both of yall.........much apreciated
-
yo good piece yo. i was most def feeling the dark and eery scenery/imagery....vocab was used well
all flowed well.. some good content and concepts which had deepness to them. and u sure poured some real emotion into this joint
........structure was nice as well,,,,,,,,,, definitely has its original qualities about it
all in all an interesting read f'sho
stay poppin
1
