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"Promises"
Promises
Some relationships are bad, and there's some relationships i've had
When i relied on promises to bring the relationship back
A promise is something fun, so that something will be done
You make that person promise...so "that" something really comes
A promise is a want, a promise is a change in a desire
But every promise you make, just adds another flame into the fire
Everytime you make a promise...your always prayin and ya hopin
That it'll come true, But promises are just made to be broken
People make promises for the wrong reasons, in the worst cases
If you don't expect it to be broken, don't make a promise in the 1st place then
Couples think a promise is the light, i'll compare it to the dark
Because promises won't bring you together, It will just tear you apart
Friends promise each other that they'll be there when we need em
Bush promised a safe environment, just like he promised us our freedom
God promised no more floods, and he promised that we'd see
But i'm still "blind".....and its flooding as i speak
Mom used to promise no more nightmares, but they fluttered in my dreams
She promised the lightning would go away, when it thundered in my sleep
Even as i grew older, promises still became important
Erika Promised to have my kid, and she wound up having an abortion
A promise is an indication...just another type of hint
To say what you want said, so the arguement can end
It might not work the way you want it...
......You might not get it the way you need it
But you have to accept the result, even if the result aignt worth keepin
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ok.
In this piece i think and everybody else may say as well, that you used the word promise far too many times in this piece. It was repetetive and that made this piece loose out i think a lil. It also damaged the vocab, although your vocab was ok and this was an alright subject.
I would say in future if you want to lay down a verse like this you got to use better vocab and not use a single word so many times in one piece. It makes the piece only sound like a nursery rhyme, but overall this was an average drop. take this and make your next piece dope fam ok, i'll be looking out for your next drop. Remember vocab-
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This piece was aight, it had a lil emotion but the repetivness cut that down quite a bit. The structure needs a lil working as well, you don't have to centre everything. Also try making your lines more shorter or even. Overall, it was a good try, just keep poppin
Check this, Thanks:
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....php?p=4300800
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up, and thanks for the feed.
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Re: "Promises"
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Re: "Promises"
