Take Five and Aim

Erase me, you disgrace me, its over, don’t you chase me.
I’m better than I was before, I’m better now that I walked out that door.
You can't get me, you had me and now you want to understand me?
After you left me here heart broken it was only you that had the token to my mind to my heart, and to my soul. Breaking all of my trust was probably your main goal. So go, have fun with all the boys that'll do you and if they're smart like me, they'll see right through you. You're a liar and a cheater and most of all a deceiver. It’s sad but true, I loved you more then you would have ever known. You ripped through my life like a tornado or a cyclone. And now I'm all alone, back to square one. I should have known this before we had begun. So take my gun and aim. When you're pulling on the trigger scream my name. There's no more chances to rekindle this flame, I’m over the game, I’m over the hurt, I’m over the pain. I'm over the lies, I'm ready to change. My life is rearranged might sound strange but you're no longer in my range. I'll move on, I'll be strong and don’t you ever forget that nothing is life-long.

Well it worked well as storytelling and wordplay. but i just wasnt feeling it man. Maybe you need to do a little bit work on your shit. Still you have the potential tho you just need to practise your craft lol.
Pretty good overall but allways room for improvment. Keep them coming.

Thanks man

cool dawg u seem real g'd out crazy shit

This was kinda short, You need alot of work on flow & structure the whole scheme was over the place, But still someone how I managed to like this story a little bit, Props, Stay up & keep elevating....

u need 16 lines min. man
1stbar was crap only mutis no good wordplay.
and jus elevate sorry fams but u need 2.