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city of sin
i pull up fulled up grippin my still
the tool pulled up siping some armimil
the fool muled up dipping the scean to feel
i cant take it i need the bread
so im ready to shoot and kill
dough is time bloody do loot and deal
so i walk in the store and make some noise
so i talk sin to the whore and take the lifes of the boys
i empty the register the shit is on and crackin
but i didnt measure and speed is what im lackin
so i run and jump in my car and hit the gass
the chrome gets a pumpand the the cops i pass
the drone of this dump the police think there crunk they can kiss my ass
the days have there ways in the city of sin
the plays have there says in the pitty of men
the heart of a cold blooded killa born to the dealer
the part of the bold stealer torn to the killa
the days have there ways in the city of sin
the plays have there says in the pitty of men
the heart of a cold blooded killa born to the dealer
the part of the bold stealer torn to the killa
the boots the court the ride upnorth
the hoot the screaming the hate of sorts
the jail the time for a heathin
sstuck in hell with no chance of breathing
the jumpsuit doesnt fit and the food taste like shit
the lawsuit rubbin shit panned face the spit
iall i have is a memory and a song
but even thats temporary and wont last to long
so this is my song trapped in a cage full of rage
like a slap in the face turning the fule to a new page
the days have there ways in the city of sin
the plays have there says in the pitty of men
the heart of a cold blooded killa born to the dealer
the part of the bold stealer torn to the killa
the days have there ways in the city of sin
the plays have there says in the pitty of men
the heart of a cold blooded killa born to the dealer
the part of the bold stealer torn to the killa
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errr no offense I wasnt feeling it that much....so you need to sorta get your set-ups better thats the only advice I can give you, I liked the speed punch though that was nice
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yeah yeah yeah i agree with my nigga detriot i wasnt really feelin it
vote for this
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...82#post3246682
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I liked your little chorus you had there. But the rest of your stuff I wasn't feeling. Short lines that seemed boring. Although you did have multi's :)
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i pull up fulled up grippin my still
lol you mean steel?
WHAQ get up out of here nigga you aint no G
G Boy$ project niggas southside ave holla
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....hmmmmmmmmmm...
Seemed awfully basic to me. I would say use a broder vocab. The subject matter was alright... but you honestly didnt carry it out very well. You couldve been far more descriptive. Flow was iight, you should use mult's to help it.
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i wasn't feeling this piece that much, the rhymes were pretty weak although they mainly rhymed you have to use good vocab to bring it together and i didn't see that here. There was a few good lines but overall this wasn't really good. You need to up your vocab and work on your rhymes then it will read alot better. piece
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Very Basic......I see your trying inners.....and a few scatterd multies .....but the overall piece wasnt worth the read... try adding more then just rhymes....the structure is the only decent thing about this
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basic wasnt much man but had some good parts
