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Another Year...
Another Year.
wake up from cold sweats, my best bet, stay alive and break dreams
cuz faith seems to have me ready to scream and im only 15
growin from these roots, taking the path that'll lead me to the top
my feeat. always moving, always changing, never in the same spot
been through good times, type of memories that'll never be overwritten
being able to run home.. to my moms, n help her by pitchin in
but ive gone through bad, being ill.. but i thank God for living
cuz sickness only gets better, after every piece you've written
in the hot, cold, and mild times.. all being happy seasons
w/ my family and friends on my side.. never seeing any treason
my soul elevates, mentally and physically growing
positive signs im showing, and immatureness im throwing
the mind of a young man, filled w/ plenty of fascinating thoughts
ready to untie my true power.. and loosen the knot
been waiting patiently.. and now my time of shine is here
ive learned from the past, its time for the future....
AND A WHOLE NOTHER YEAR..
my bday in an hour :yes:..
btw this my first topical.. so if its kinda wack..well yah...still elevating on topicals..
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...lmao...
damn this for a first topical was nice as hell u did what was told to do....yeaya....
but yea ya emotion was definitly felt and ya imagry was ill u had nice multis in there gave ya verse another demesion and ur vocab was at par......
thats whassup fam i think u mite have a knak for topicals ...
and if u aint online in and hour
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
keep on elevatin with dopeness
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pretty nice, u didnt go witht he all-out multie style like so many are trying. This seemed a lil too much like poetry though. U need to use a lil more bigger words and try to make it longer even though u prolly just freed this for fun. Not bad actually though. If u can think stuff out u can be dope man. read some topicals in legends and in SS so u can see how people write their words. Try listening to music too. And maybe try writing a story with it once or twice. But not bad, 6/10, good job-PEACE
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DAMN......and this only ur first.....
I liked this peice....imagery was off the chain....(i felt like i was there witnessing the hold thing)..... nice use of words.........it had complexity.....nice vocab.........and some OM'S are simple and shit but this, this was good .....title matched the peice and ery thing....nice job man i'll be lookin for some more of ur shit in the future......keep up the good work......
if u get time go check out my poem(Don't Tell Me) its in Poetic Scriptures......
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Leave better feedback. 2 lines for feed does not cut it.