Temptations

-Temptations-

"There's only one first love"

When I first met you you were star struck,
we kept our gaurd up for luck cause hearts can get fucked.
I'm bein honest my intentions went beyond sex,
now first impressions are a lil outa context, why the foolish mind checks?
I always took your coat that's my courtesy,
you gave me dirty looks in return but they hurt you more than they hurt me.
I never planed it to do you damage,
I'm a man so I never used my hands for what I couldn't manage.
You took advantage when we was pantless,
my love for granted, I finger fucked you crazy jus so we could manage.
Now befriendin me's condemnin me to memories,
gotta new tendencey to remedy the vemon wit some V.S. Hennessey.
Homely tones disown me, not alone but lonely,
you was more than a bone you was my homie,
then you picked up your bags and left my ass in the past,
no questions asked, jus more trash to wrap in leaf and turn to ashes.

uppin

i liked this... simple but to point and vocab was ok but using stuff like "Lil" isnt really good for topicals try to use the full word but this was good. Keep Droppin.

This wasnt bad at all homie

I never planed it to do you damage,
I'm a man so I never used my hands for what I couldn't manage

Thats a nice line man i feelin this piece

meh. structure wasnt tha bad. so it helps the reader follow along. your flow was choppy a little at points here and there, but nothing bad enough that you cant work on it. imagiry was meh meh, gotta work on that...just think harder. other than that it wasnt that bad, but wasnt that good either.

just work on it man..youll elevate..

good job.

uppin

uppin

uppin

The structure was tight. I mean the verse was tight as hell, a couple of lines didn't flow.. but the point was made, which always in my opinion, Is more important then anything. Good shit

Nice bro, the flow was really nice and easy to read, the multis were nice and i liked the whole of ur rhymin scheme. The wrdplay was nice but culd be elevated.

Part from that nice drop and keep droppin.

Peace :D Hit up my !!! Sick And Tired !!! drop plz homie.