When I'm Not Looking Ft. Foreshadow

Foreshadow:
It was time for me to stray away from my alcohol virginity
The only way would be today. I was planning to drink infinity's
Flustered & frazzled. I'm excited about getting completely trashed
This is going to be the biggest bash. But I have no alcohol stashed
I figure Kumar will hook me up real tight. Enough liquor for the night
I should give him 100 dollars just to make the situation feel right
We go back pretty far. He's a former basketball star turned cashier
Now & then we see how we are & the rest you wouldn't want to hear
I'm slightly buzzing. My chest feels real warm. Jack'll do that to you
In the mood of loving. I need more shots before I head to Ku's
Alcohol easing my inhibitions. I'm in the position for the time of my life
In an instant I've bought the liquor & I'm seat belted in for the ride
Driving around. Bottle of whiskey in hand just doing whatever I plan
Running red lights on demand. Jumping from seat to seat it's not too bad
That very instant life went mad. I tried to hit the break from the back seat
It was difficult. There was so much speed that alcohol just had me beat

Elemental Soul:
Flash, I got hit in a blink of an eye, I think i'ma a die
My memories take control, my soul shrinks to the sky
I had seen the girl that I loved, the reason I make sperm
Butterflies in my stomach? I believe it's a tape worm
I'm lying here bleeding to death, after worken at the deli
Thinking about how I hooked up my younger friend's belly
He was under age, wanting liquor so I'd always be nice
Gave me 100 bucks, even when he didn't owe me the price
But before he bought the liquor, I got a call on my cell
My girl invited me to a party, she told me it's all going well
I wasn't able to go, so she said she would meet me soon
Across the street from the store, right beneath the moon
But before this all happened, I remembered yesterday
My girl sold her car to my young friend, for a better pay
My young friend drank for his first time today, no wonder
This car's familiar, I'm dead, but that's cause of my blunder
I guess I should of stayed a star, playing basketball
The worst happens when I'm not looking, so let my casket fall

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=1#post2868685
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=217519

First off,

I had seen the girl that I loved, the reason I make sperm
Butterflies in my stomach? I believe it's a tape worm

^Dopeness.

Solid verses from both of you.. but I felt Elemental Soul's rhym sheme better fit the topic, Foreshadow.. didn't come as hard as Elemental, but it was a decent intro, improve on flow.. and wittyness, nay mean? I liked this line tho

I'm slightly buzzing. My chest feels real warm. Jack'll do that to you

^the setep was there for a dope line, but.. it never came?

Elemental, your verse was good. It had qotable lines, an real imagry, the ending just felt forced.

Overall, I liked the topic, not original. but well written'.. solid peace, keep this up.
Pz.

ayoo this shit was hot to def....the calab on this was sick...both of yall had some hot punchlines and multi's.....this is the second one i read from u and i like the other one alot too.....story that yall were tell was dope...overall i give u a 9 cause of the lines that yall made up.....sick shit..keep it up

Thankd for the Feedback Up...^

Up again.

Leave feed-back and i'll gladly return the favor.

yoo this song was crazyy !!

sikk how u 2 worked 2gether u both kept it on topic...ur flows were ill 1 or 2 streched lines from foreshadow but it was still tiight.... both ur guys imagry was off the hook....
this would be really dope in audio all u guys need is a hook and thatll be tiight...im lookiin foward to readdin new shyt frum both of you keep it up

fav lines

foreshadow:
I'm slightly buzzing. My chest feels real warm. Jack'll do that to you
In the mood of loving. I need more shots before I head to Ku's


Elemental Soul:
Flash, I got hit in a blink of an eye, I think i'ma a die
My memories take control, my soul shrinks to the sky



9/10~!!

Yo good shit on diz. Shit was crazy. Nice calab. Da multi's flow n structure was good. Yea i agree wit nephew a.k.a kid - diz would b crazy if u made it an audio.

My fav. lines was:

Foreshadow:

I'm slightly buzzing. My chest feels real warm. Jack'll do that to you
In the mood of loving. I need more shots before I head to Ku's

Elemental Soul:

I had seen the girl that I loved, the reason I make sperm
Butterflies in my stomach? I believe it's a tape worm


Good work on diz. Keep em comin. 9/10 :thumbup:

Thanks for the feedback....

GOD DAMN

We need to hit a collab together ne of u should collab wit me
cuz dat shit was hard as hell

check out my open mic
I hate 2.B.A. Problem(stand up) Rapbattle mix