-
what is child hood
what is child hood when you miss it//
your mothers a junkie and your fathers con-victed//
your three lil sisters are hungry and you too//
do you ask god for help or do what you can do//
do you miss whats supposed to be the best time of your life//
so you can hustle crack to buy baby wipes//
pampers and milk, everyday at school you got to skip//
cuz your oldest lil sister is 5 and she cant clean up the two year olds shit//
she cant gix a bottle and can hardly feed herself//
you got to go to the store to steal your families dinnere off of the candy shelf//
child hood shouldnt be that//
how the fuck do you think it feel to have to serve mommy crack//
all ytou have left of your father is memories and his dog tags//
what else can you do but say fuck your childhood and start being a man//
or better yet a soldier//
i call my self sixmilez cuz since age 6 my childhood has been over...
coming back with links
-
-
upp for responses if you like either of the other verses replie here
-
my fav part iz
how the fuck do you think it feel to have to serve mommy crack
all ytou have left of your father is memories and his dog tags
pretty hardcore stuff am feeling it fosho
i like the way you finished it too that was kinder sick
cud ov been a few lines longer..
i can flow wit this
maybe the text can be made to look a bit more appealing somehow for the page...
rhymes was nice
expand, blow up let em loose
stay da fuck up
-
This is pretty good man.Not like some of da rest of da noobs who just fuck up there structure.Good voca.,flow at times were off,and all u need to do is fix da structure and rhymes a lil and good font and make it a lil longer.
-
I thought it was good in the feeling of it...The wordplay was ok...and ur no multies or metas...I thought it was average but nice story if this is all true...Yea I know how it feels to have a dead beat dad and my mom is everything I have...I liked the first line in ur verse the best for some reason...Well good verse and elevate and keep postin
-
I was feelin it, its sum raw shyt not all flashy i like it cause its real im feelin you and i wanna let u kno keep doin ya thang jus expand on ya stories and make them even more vivid study otha peoples flows to learn the art of storytellin cause u have da background suitable to b a good storytella jus keep workin nigga
-
i appreciate all of the positive feed back and this is a true story i couldnt make any of this shit up and put people down who really are not like i make them out to be... I appreciate yalls comments and ill try to stay up as ussual everybody be easy
-
ight not a bad piece to be honest flow'd well you show'd a lil imagrey and emotion which is good structure was ok although i dont like the // it just spoils it so try and leave them out ight but all and all pretty good piece keep droppin and tryin to elevate ight 1
yo can u hit my OM in my sig pz ight 1
-
good lookiing on the replie and i will chill with the backslashes keep the responses coming
-
yo...
yo dawgs i feelin it..good shit homie...but you should try to work on the vocab just a lil bit iight, but it was dope :thumbup:
-
this the most responses ive ever got keep em coming .. i wish yall could have read the other two that the moderator closed
-
nice nice not bad, your flow was kinda choppy at some parts just be carefull with your wording, try to use some multi's too
how the fuck do you think it feel to have to serve mommy crack//
all ytou have left of your father is memories and his dog tags//
^^ I liked this part
keep elevatin homie props
