Tha-Joka Vs. IncineratedRose [B/O Vs. LC.]

Crew Battle:
Blade Oracles Vs. Lost Cause

Rules: Topical
-No Crew Votes
-No Hate Votes
-No D/R Votes
-No Swaying
-No Feeding
-10+ Lines
-Due Monday @ or before Midnight

Topic: TBD Pick a topic and agree on it.


GoodLuck..

Just Checking In.
Ok Rose make a list of atleast 3 topics cause I'm drawing a blank.

Check, and thanks for actually telling me i had a battle? wtf...

Topic - Distance Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

Distance Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

I'd last seen her in her elegant gown on the staircase
I yerned for her re-appearance there & yet I stare away
.....Her loin shook the window & her hair swept the floor
But now that she's gone they're idle like a dead lion's roar
......My goodside is no longer here,so my aura is unkept
Emotions run wild but nothing is as straining as when I wept
For my lovers return someday but no matter what she was gone
With the wind with no sign of return..& my love is still fond
For it's missing piece to come back in place some day soon
We belong together like Night & Stars or the Sun & Moon
I know without her there is no me & yet I cant help but wonder
If when I die too does"Distance Makes The Heart Grow Fonder"

*done* sorry so short

Distance Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

I'd last seen her in her elegant gown on the staircase
I yerned for her re-appearance there & yet I stare away
.....Her loin shook the window & her hair swept the floor
But now that she's gone they're idle like a dead lion's roar
......My goodside is no longer here,so my aura is unkept
Emotions run wild but nothing is as straining as when I wept
For my lovers return someday but no matter what she was gone
With the wind with no sign of return..& my love is still fond
For it's missing piece to come back in place some day soon
We belong together like Night & Stars or the Sun & Moon
I know without her there is no me & yet I cant help but wonder
If when I die if"Distance Makes The Heart Grow Fonder"

*done* sorry so short & that last line was a typo

^Deep man, i like it.

The War Effort.

I stumble and mumble, grumbling as I rest on trees,
Forgotten memories, as I plead with the locals…
…attempting to speak in Japanese.
My expertise is killing the enemies, but I’m nervous,
Wars come and go, but me placed in one, happened on purpose,
Volunteering my service to protect the land of the free,
Thoughts disappearing, reminiscing with Mary…my wife to be,
Dating for 11 months, my heart sunk, at the site of her beauty,
But now, I’m away from my love holding this gun… and serving my duty,
I am disputing, this war, and concluding it’s for…
NOTHING! I’m stuck in a pit, fighting for something!
That I put no belief in, getting frustrated with tongues…
…That I have no idea how to speak in.
Tears seepin’ from my eyes and I wonder how?
Am I killing people, when I want to envision her wedding gown,
The sun’s setting down, as my thoughts are pierced when a shot rings out,
A stream of blood seeps down, I hit the ground, only support I see now,
The question I ask god, how do they talk with smiles?
My heart will grow fonder…But all the distance did…
Was prevent me from seeing my wife… walk the isle…

Up.....#1.........................................

Both had similar takes on the topic, but I felt Incinerated's was a bit more creative...he had more of a story also.....his rhyme scheme and internals and imagry and emotion were better also
Tha-Joka....your verse was kind of plain.....add some twists and upgraded vocab to enhance your verse

Vote=Incinerated

uppin this for both of yall. so yall dont waste ya 5 ups:thumbup:
good luck to both

Both had similar takes on the topic, but I felt Incinerated's was a bit more creative, his concept was better,he had more of a story also,his rhyme scheme and internals and imagry and emotion were better also
Tha-Joka....your verse was kind of plain,add some twists and upgraded vocab to enhance your verse, also a little bit of multies

Vote=Incineratedrose

i v/joka cuz he had better flow his was real deep i liked his both verses were good but joka i think had better flow and structure no beef im out this was a good ass batle though like this one my vote sticks with

v/joka

good flow? as in that decided a topical? stupid ass.

Uppin for these dudes..................