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eyo these drugs got me addicted....its to late 4 me the damage been inflicted,i aint the same no more my whole lifes affected....my parents love 4 me it aint as strong! ive wrecked it.....im tellin you my pain...im tryin to reflect it......i jus hope u check this shit hope that you inspect it.
i know some of you understand the shit im spittin......some of u niggas!! already been bitten.....i used to be soft an gentle like a kitten.....now im evil....my fate its been written!!!
Um...what the hell is this....i'd try again sorry....but attempt was good
This was too short to give a lot of feed but it was pretty basic there could of been a good story rap in there but you didnt write enough on the topic.
The structure needs work you need to up your vocab so you can describe your feelings better and the flow needs to be worked on.
Keep writing and you'll learn more and improve.
Return the favour.
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=182783
last piece didnt have links so this one surely wont, just saving us some time :)