-
"BATTLECRIES"
"BATTLECRIES"
:shoot:
On the front lines grippin my gun, knowing my missions
This aint superstition,legion v.s legion,going full-collision
Holdin' my position until i hear the "BATTLECRIES"
Was all the hardwork and training just to be sacrificed?
.....
Hours have passed,theres still shooting and grenades exploding Blood flyin everywhere and soldias organs exposing I lost all my allies but it seems we got a victory But it aint worth it when they both aint contradictory You look around and all you see is straight armageddon I inspect all the dead bodies and all i kould do is keep regreting You could tell by my expression that I had aggression on my brain taught a lesson of opression, by losin my allies and causin pain
..........need feedback for this.........
If yall like this drop then ill finish it later
-
-
ah come on can i get sum feedback?.......uppin!
-
damn straight sleepin on my stuff huh................need feedback peoples!
uppin!
-
[/CENTER] But it aint worth it when they both aint contradictory [CENTER]You look around and all you see is straight armageddon
Yo it's yo BUDDY EDICIT . That was ILL :shoot:
-
thanx bro finally atleast sum feedback....uppin!
-
damn dude sleepin on my shit.......uppin c'mon show sum luv!
-
fuck dude.....uppin for sum feedback!
-
This could use another verse, so try and add to it. Maybe something like your battle back home. There was some good vocab and the rhyming was nice. Work on it.
-
This was str8, i liked it. Suttin like a Tupac spit, flowed nice n multies was tyte. Make it longer tho, its too short to get into. Is them top 4 lines ur hook? If so, its dope. Add to this then re post it, be nice to c it.
Hit mine up in return plz, "The Team Anthem".
1
-
aight thanx homies...ill make it longer and post it later....uppin!
-
yo uppin.....kan one of yall vote on my battle?....ill appreciate it(one more vote and i sweep this cat)
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...7&page=2&pp=15
-
this was aight....the biggest problem with it was stretched lines...these are very bad for your verse because it messes the flow up horribly, and can make your verse hard to read thus boring your readers and not allowing your thoughts to come through as strong as they would otherwise.
-
shuld've lenthenged ur verse.....nice little Imagery...straight drop....good job stayin on topic.....overall....pretty decent
5/10
-
uppinh for sum feedback...one!
