some shit that was floatin around in my dome....feedback pleez

Yo, i say wit cofindence that 99% of yall will never be known
my case is different the wick is lit and i'm bout to lyrically explode
its like i opened my mouth and spit out words of C4
blowin yall out the water wit my verbal uproar
I spit out aids and i don't give a fuck who i'm infectin
if I hit you your terminal and they'll be no resurrection
I'm bout to let loose a side of Tha Return that yall neva seen
the side that sells ur kidney on ebay while I exract ur spleen
you could call me a serial killa cuz i murder mics on a regular basis
don't step in my path cuz u really have no idea who you facin
I'm the one that can get my point across wit a 10 line verse
from the moment i was born the entire world was cursed
I am a demon that was released by satin himself
to curupt the world and for fill my wishes of fortune and wealth


just some shit that was floatin around in my dome!!!!
links
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=143060
http://rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=142615

I thought that it was a deep. I like the fact you used human nature in you OM some people dont have that...you also seemed to have alot of shit on your chest and that was a good way to get it off.

yo da point has been put out n felt fully if dis iz juz floatin in ya head cant wait to c wut iz comin when u really try 2 lyrically murder niccaz keep flowin 1

LARS

Yo thanks for the feedback lets keep it comin!!!!

pz

this was cool.. i see ur just startin out its good to get thtat shit off ur chest . keep workin at it ..

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=143194

straight feedback yall keep it comin!!!!thanx!!!!!

that shit was on point....pretty dope..keep up the good job and keep practiceing

Yo thankz for the feedback Keep it comin!!!!!!!!!!

murder me ... i nominate myself .. for a endless battle of dissing each other .. this was tighter then any other shit i seen so far ... the skeme an rhyme was nice ... but yea battle me or somethin .. i'm bored

truth, i enjoyed it. easy lyriks were twisted to sumfin else that i didnt expect...but thats rap....
keep that shit up hope to battle your style....how bout tomorrow?? haha

.....peace

i think this is prolly some of the best shit that i have seen from you man..overall this was pretty tight man...real deep cam up real strong on the wordin your imagery was greeat...and this flow was easy to read..i think the ending was alot better than the begginning..but overall great job man

Quote:

---

ORIGINALLY POSTED BY FIRE

I thought that it was a deep. I like the fact you used human nature in you OM some people dont have that...you also seemed to have alot of shit on your chest and that was a good way to get it off.

---

well said...

yo thanx for the feedback yall but no one is telling me what i need to work on keep it comin!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, lyrically it was cool, my favorite lines:


I spit out aids and i don't give a fuck who i'm infectin
if I hit you your terminal and they'll be no resurrection
I'm bout to let loose a side of Tha Return that yall neva seen
the side that sells ur kidney on ebay while I exract ur spleen

keep it up yo, good drop.

wizz

yo thanx for the feedback keep it comin yall!!!!!!

Your flow was your strong point...

All I can say is that you need to be more creative and not just drop stuff like this coz to be honest it's like somethin you could see in the cypher forum. Other than that you were just ventin and did a good job of it.

Keep droppin and elevating